


The Choi Triplets

by ShimmeringMist



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Abuse, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Assassination Attempt(s), Assault, Attempted Kidnapping, Background Relationships, Canon Compliant, Canonical Character Death, Depression, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Explicit Language, Fluff, Gen, Heavy Angst, Hostage Situations, Hurt/Comfort, Kidnapping, Major Character Injury, Major Original Character(s), Masturbation, Mild Blood, No Incest, POV Male Character, POV Original Character, POV Third Person, Past Brainwashing, Past Drug Use, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Self-Doubt, Self-Harm, Sexual Content, Sexual Humor, Sibling Bonding, Slow Build, Spoilers, Suicidal Thoughts, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-18
Updated: 2019-04-27
Packaged: 2019-05-08 18:13:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 59,320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14699589
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShimmeringMist/pseuds/ShimmeringMist
Summary: Trying to protect one brother was hard enough, living in the shadows of a mad politician makes you strong, so does being raised in a cult. So what's it like, then, to be raised "normal" only for your life to be stolen away...literally.A what-if fanfiction on if the Choi twins were actually triplets and their reactions to a third brother they didn't know about, who had been raised in a completely different environment.Warning!:Contains major spoilers and possible triggering themes, read at your own risk. Do not read or comment on this if you are a minor.**This fanfiction takes place a few years after the events of the secret endings**





	1. Three's a Crowd

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks so much for stopping by, I would really appreciate any comments or critiques you may have. They mean the world to me (Don't be too rude, I'm trying to improve). If you're not the best with words a kudos works too. I sincerely hope everyone seems in character and that Saehyun doesn't bug you too much. Anyways, I hope you enjoy!
> 
> Warning!: Contains major spoilers and triggering themes, read at your own risk. Do not read or comment on this if you are a minor.
> 
> **This fanfiction takes place a few years after the events of the secret endings**

“I can't believe I slept in this morning and I'm still tired,” Saehyun mumbled to himself before running a hand through his dishevelled red hair. It must have come undone from the gel he had coated it in this morning. Now it was a mess and covered in dried up flakes of the hair product. He needed to shower when he got back.

He adjusted his glasses slightly before letting out a loud yawn and stretching his arms over his head. He forgot he was holding his messenger bag and it ended up smacking him in the side of the face. He laughed at his clumsiness, chalking it up to being much more tired than he originally thought.

He was currently walking home from his last shift at the clinic he worked at through the summer until the next semester started up again. He had a car mind you, but he felt walking was much healthier and the clinic was not that far a walk from his apartment anyway.

It was dark out and stars twinkled in the sky as the moon peeked out behind the clouds that were now dispersing from a short drizzle that had occurred earlier in the day. He took some of the fresh air into his lungs before letting it out slowly. Walking by shops and restaurants as he made his way home. The warm light that the passing cars and street lamps emitted, calmed him.

He stopped when he noticed a woman looking around herself, seemingly quite distressed. It was as if she lost something important to her or maybe she was lost herself. Their eyes met and she instantly began to calm, which confused him. Maybe she was desperate to find someone to give her directions? He decided he'd wait for her to cross the street and ask. He didn't want a woman to be wandering around at night by herself. Maybe he would also offer to walk her back. Or was that creepy? Nevermind, don't ask to walk her back.

“Saeyoung!” She called, he turned and looked around him but no one else was there. Maybe she was mistaking him for someone else? Or maybe they were not in his line of sight? Well, either way, she found the person she was looking for and it was not him, so he turned and continued walking. Why did she look as if she wanted to talk to him then?

“Wait, Saeyoung where are you going? Don't just walk away!” He continued walking, it was none of his business. “Or Saeran? Saeran is that you? What are you doing out here?” For some reason, he stopped and turned to look at her. She was running to catch up to him and she let out a breath when she finally did, gripping his arm to steady herself. He immediately ripped his arm away, confused. Why was this stranger touching him? She must be drunk. “Saeran?” Her voice seemed laced with concern. Man, she must really be out of it. “I'm sorry I mixed you up with your brother, are you upset?”

“Do you need me to call you a cab?” He asked, unsure of what to do in this situation.

“Call me a cab? We live together. Saeran, did you and Saeyoung fight again or something?”

“Not that I know of, because I don't know any Saeyoungs and my name is not Saeran.”

“What are you talking about?”

“You're mistaking me for somebody else, my name is Saehyun.” He replied, crossing his arms over his chest as his tone of voice became slightly irritated. He didn't really want to deal with a drunk woman right now, his day was stressful enough.

“Saehyun? Are you joking around right now? Haha,” her voice seemed unsure. “Oh and I like your new glasses, you look good without your contacts. Are you out here buying new clothes?” She scanned his form quickly before smiling at him reassuringly.

“No, and I'm not the person you're looking for. Let me call you a cab and get you home. I don't want you wandering around drunk in the middle of the night.”

“Drunk? I'm not drunk. What's going on with you?”

“Nothing, I don't know you,” he drew each word out slowly as if speaking to a child.

“What?” Panic crossed her eyes as she stepped back, away from him. “Did you hit your head? Do you have amnesia?” Her phone suddenly went off, the catchy ringtone filling the silence that surrounded them. She pulled out her phone from the purse slung over her shoulder and tapped a spot on the screen before bringing it to her ear.

“Sorry babe, I got distracted and lost track of you. I'm with Saeran right now, I'm coming to get you. Stay where you are, okay?” Could be heard from her phone’s speaker.

“Wait, Saeran is with you? Then who's…” she was giving him a look like she had just seen a ghost. Almost as if she was about to be the next victim in a horror movie; just now noticing the monster standing behind her as she looked in the mirror. “Who's standing in front of me?” Her voice shook, and Saehyun could feel himself become nervous at her strange response. What was her problem?

“I told you who I am,” he replied, glancing to his side for a second before focusing back on her. This was such a strange encounter.

“What do you mean, who's in front of you?! I'm almost there, I'm coming as fast as I can. Don't you dare go anywhere!” a very expensive looking car suddenly came to a screeching halt next to the woman causing him to jump and adrenaline to pump through his veins. The call had ended but the woman in front of him still stood there, phone next to her ear while she gaped at him. He had a feeling he shouldn't stand around there any longer, as he turned to leave. What if this woman was about to be attacked or mugged? He hesitated as he turned to look at her, someone exiting the vehicle. Shit, if he was going to get her out of here, he needed to get her out of here now! He grabbed her arm and started running as he pulled her along with him.

“Hey, what are you-!” Her phone could be heard dropping onto the ground with a clack. He would replace that for her later; it was better than walking away when she could very well be hurt by someone, even if she was weird.

“Come on, stop struggling! They're going to attack us!” He yelled as he continued to drag her along, but she wouldn't let up and kept dragging her feet across the ground as if he was the one she was trying to avoid.

“Attack us? You're the one attacking me!” She yelled, trying to rip herself from his grip.

“Stop that! I won't let you be an idiot and get hurt!” He was out of breath, it wasn't like he ran very often. He would exercise enough to stay healthy and that was it. He was gulping in air now as they ran. It seemed she had calmed down somewhat after he explained himself more and she began to follow him.

“What do you mean?” She asked between breaths as they ducked down into an alleyway.

“They're trying to mug us, I don't know.” He slowed down, now unsure of his motives. Maybe they were the people she had called? Great, now he looked like a kidnapper.

“Mug us?” She laughed, he could feel his cheeks warm up in embarrassment.

“You knew them?” He stopped completely, feeling utterly embarrassed now as he tried to catch his breath. “Sorry, I just thought you were in danger…” he trailed off as he quickly let go of her.

“It's fi-” she was cut off as the world seemed to flip on its axis. He could see the walls of the buildings flying by him as the back of his head hit concrete. His arms were pinned to the ground and he could feel someone hold his body down with their own. He paid that no mind though as his ears began ringing and his vision blurred. He let out a wheeze as all the oxygen he had been trying to get into his lungs, left them.

“Saeyoung, stop! It was a misunderstanding!” He could just barely make out the woman's voice as his mind tried to get the world back into focus. It was like he was underwater and everything around him was happening above the surface.

“Like hell it was!” The man yelled, drawing his fist back to launch a punch directly in his face. His eyes focused just in time to see it flying forward, straight towards his nose when it suddenly stopped. The man seemed stunned by something as a street light that had once been off seemed to flicker on in that moment, lighting up the whole alleyway. Like a light shining down from the heavens.

At first, Saehyun was confused, was he looking into a mirror? Maybe he had died and was now looking back on himself. Perhaps all his memories would fly by, one by one and he could regret never achieving his dreams of becoming a doctor. Dying in an alleyway for some girl who mistook him for her lover or sibling. But then his look-alike moved away; almost as if he had been burned. In that moment he knew he was still alive, as he slowly sat up.

“What the fuck?” his look-alike mumbled.

“I thought you said Saeran was your only brother?”

“H-he is…” he sputtered, their identical pairs of golden eyes staring back at each other in horror. Neither of them seemed sure of what to do as the street light suddenly went out again, covering their surroundings in darkness once more.

The voice of another man makes its way towards his ears from behind the petite woman, “What the fuck?” His gaze shifted towards the figure, another look-alike. Had he been cloned? What was going on? He could feel his heart rate pick up as he began to back away from the three of them. Please tell me this is a nightmare, he thought as he could feel a layer of sweat begin to coat his skin. Maybe he would wake up from this dream soon and realize he had just fallen asleep at work. That was just hopeful thinking, however, as reality hit him harder than a ton of bricks. This was very much real.

“What the fuck…” he whispered, he could feel tears well up at the corners of his eyes. He wasn’t above crying and right now he wanted nothing more than to hold onto something and do just that. “Who are you, people? Why do you look like me?” His voice cracked as he tried to hold back his tears.

“I could ask the same of you!” Saeyoung replied, clenching his fists at his sides. “That's a pretty good disguise. Who do you work for?” His voice was filled with anger and spite. “I'm surprised they didn't send someone a little better at this job. They must really be low on agents.” He took a step forward and Saehyun let out a shaky breath. What the hell was this guy talking about? A spy movie? Because he wasn't in the mood. He was now standing above Saehyun as he moved his hand forward to grab a fistful of his hair before tugging extremely hard. He swore he could feel some strands get ripped straight out of his scalp as his head moved with Saeyoung’s hand.

“Ah!” He let out a pain filled noise as tears began to roll down his cheeks involuntarily.

“Saeyoung, stop! You're hurting him!” The woman suddenly pushed her companion away, before bending down in front of Saehyun to inspect the damage.

“MC, get away from him!” Saeyoung and the other man, who had previously been standing behind her, said in unison. Though the woman ignored them as she ran a hand soothingly through his unkempt red hair and traced a finger across his cheeks to wipe away the tears. Removing her hand from the back of his head she noticed it was now covered in blood and she gasped before quickly helping him up.

The world spun the moment he was back on his feet and he felt he would either retch or pass out. He did neither as he steadied himself on a nearby garbage can. He gazed into it just in case anything came out. He could hear the three of them arguing now, but he paid it no mind as he tried his hardest not to collapse into the trash receptacle. His breathing was ragged as he placed a hand on his chest to try to calm it down. He would definitely throw up at this rate.

“We'll take him back with us and figure out what to do with him there,” Saeyoung's voice suddenly came back into focus for him as he calmed himself down somewhat.

“We can't kidnap him!” Was the woman the only voice of reason those two men had?

“We don't know who he's working for, we don't know why he's here. Everything is too risky to just let him go and you're trusting him way too much.” Was that jealousy? Seriously? “Come on!” A hand suddenly gripped one of his arms, pulling him to the side. He stumbled and fell forward before just barely catching himself.

“Wait-wait!” Saehyun exclaimed as he was pulled along to the car the two men had stepped out of not even a few minutes prior. He let his feet drag against the ground; maybe if he made enough noise someone would find them and catch these criminals. They didn't answer him as they continued dragging him along. “Please-”

“Make any more noise and I won't hesitate to kill you,” Saeyoung turned his head slightly to give him a piercing look. It was as if he's done this multiple times before.

“I'm going to throw up,” Saehyun whispered. When they ignored him he made sure he waited until they were at the front of this guys car before retching all over his passenger door. For some reason this caused the other man to start trying his hardest to hold in a laugh as Saeyoung came extremely close to punching Saehyun straight in the face. Luckily the woman of reason, MC, stood between them to prevent that exact thing from happening.

“Are you okay? I have some bags in case you get sick along the way,” MC’s voice was laced with concern and kindness. He didn’t know what to say in response to that. Thanks for being a considerate kidnapper? You’re still kidnapping me.

He realized he had dropped his bag at some point as he looked around frantically for it; his eyes landing upon the other man who he guessed was Saeran. He was holding both his bag and MC’s phone, the screen of which was now cracked. He was not paying for that anymore, not after this.

They all entered the vehicle, MC binding his hands with a rope while the other two got in the front. Saehyun watched as Saeyoung turned the keys in the ignition before driving off. Any shred of hope he had of escaping, diminished in that moment.

Before they had gotten in he had witnessed Saeyoung and MC fight about who got to sit with him, with Saeran occasionally piping in. MC eventually won the argument, however, with a smile of victory plastered on her face.

Now tugging slightly at his bindings, he realized he could probably easily get them undone and it’s not like he was a professional at escaping these situations. He glanced over at MC who smiled at him. Was she crazy? You just kidnapped someone who you considered dangerous. If Saeyoung was so concerned, maybe he should have been the one to bind his hands. Though then again, MC probably put more slack on them so he wouldn’t hurt his wrists; maybe he shouldn’t complain too much about who did it.

He began to run the back of his head across the headrest of the car seat, making sure to smear as much blood as he could on it. Hopefully, when the police find his body in a ditch somewhere they’ll eventually be able to trace it here. This didn’t seem like a car someone would want to get rid of and replacing things looked expensive. Blood wasn’t easy to get out of any fabric. He also secretly wanted to get back at the asshole driving this damn thing.

“Oh my god, Saeyoung do we have a first aid kit? He’s bleeding everywhere!” Her voice seemed distressed as she started searching around her for something to cover his wound. Saeran quickly pulled one out of the glove compartment before handing it to her. She snatched it from his hands like a person dying from starvation, being offered food.

He watched warily as she unzipped it before rummaging through its contents. With a click she undid her seatbelt, crawling towards him and gently tapping on his shoulder as a signal to lower his head so she could examine it. He didn’t protest as he complied to her silent request, tilting his head towards her. It’s not like he could do it himself since his hands were ‘bound’.

She began to clean the wound, gently running her hands through his hair to spread it apart like he was a delicate, porcelain doll. Well at least someone in this car felt that way about him; unlike the person who was currently glaring daggers at him through the rear-view mirror. He was going to go on a whim here and guess they were lovers.

“We shouldn’t be treating him this way, he’s obviously related to you guys,” MC said loud enough for everyone in the vehicle to hear as she covered his wound with gauze.

“I doubt that,” Saeyoung replied, his voice stern as his grip on the wheel became harsher. “There is no way he could be,” Saeran, who was sitting next to him, didn’t have a very pleased look on his face; in fact, he had quite the opposite. “You know what the nature of my past job was like and he tried to kidnap you.”

“No, he didn’t, it was a misunderstanding!” MC suddenly raised her voice as she backed away from Saehyun’s form. He took that as a cue to be able to raise his head once more. “He thought someone was trying to hurt me!”

“MC, You’re too trusting! Not everyone is like Saeyoung!” Saeran suddenly worked up the courage to speak.

“Well, what should we do? A blood test?” MC spat, sarcastically. For some reason, this caused Saeyoung’s eyes to light up as if he had just conjured a brilliant idea.

“Yeah, we’ll swab his mouth and send it to a lab,” Saeyoung explained. Saehyun could suddenly feel his mouth go dry. That would at least take up to a couple days, where the hell were they going to keep him until then? Hopefully, they wouldn’t lock him in a shed, never to see the light of day again until his impending doom when the tests came back negative.

“Wait...” A look of horror crossed MC’s face. “What are you going to do if it comes back negative?” both him and MC waited for a response. Silence spread around them. The tension between the two lovebirds was so thick he could cut through it like butter. Saeran glanced to his side at his twin when his only response was gulping audibly.

“I’d let Vanderwood deal with it, he’s better at this kind of stuff than I am,” he replied after what felt like an eternity of silence; chuckling awkwardly like this was some kind of joke. MC leaned back in her seat, a look of defeat on her face. She did not seem happy with his response at all. “MC, I-”

“I don’t want to hear it,” her voice was stern and subtly laced with anger. He was sleeping in the doghouse tonight, that much was certain. “We're keeping him on the couch,” she suddenly stated when he was finally beginning to think that was as far as the conversation would go.

“What? we can't-”

“I'm not going to let you throw him in some dark room to sleep on the floor!” She yelled. Oh boy, she seemed furious now. “I'll at least set up some pillows and blankets on the couch for him.” Saehyun glanced over at her, prying his gaze away from the window. He had been memorizing the entire route here in case he needed to escape; but now he was memorizing the expression on MC’s face, as it softened the moment they made eye contact. He only looked for a few seconds though, before quickly turning back. He didn't want to lose track of where he was.

Honestly, by the end of all this, if they were confirmed to be siblings, then they would be the first family members he has ever bothered to hate.

 

He was now laying on the couch like MC had requested. He had to witness a lot of yelling between the couple before she got her way and he wasn't put wherever Saeyoung first wanted to put him. He didn't want to know where that was. Though now his legs were also bound; those ones were done by Saeyoung himself so they were tight and uncomfortable. It seemed now his only means of escape was to squirm across the ground like a worm.

He turned himself away as they all ate dinner without their new 'guest’. Facing the backrest of the couch, he buried his face in it before letting the first few tears escape. When everyone had left, MC reassuring him it would be okay and Saeyoung getting the DNA he needed for the test they all went their separate ways and the lights were shut off.

Now alone and shrouded in darkness, he began to cry his heart out. He covered the place his head rested against in snot and tears as they ran down down his face. He gulped in air as his body shook with each sob. A few times he went to move his hands to wipe them away only for his current predicament to come crashing back into his mind and cause him to sob harder. He tried to keep it down, however, as he was scared that without MC around he was sure to be killed whether the test came back positive or not.

He could feel a sharp pain travel across his head from the wound on the back of it; now that the adrenaline had left his body. It was almost excruciating and the only thing his mind was left to focus on. Maybe it was so painful because of that reason.

He knew for sure that there was no way in hell he was getting a lick of sleep tonight. Maybe he could beg MC for painkillers the next time he saw her. He hoped that wasn't until morning. The seconds alone felt like hours. Perhaps she would get up to grab a glass of water or go to the bathroom and he could call after her; or mistake her for her boyfriend and get beaten to a bloody pulp. A shiver raced down his spine at the thought and he sniffled loudly.

“Hey…” He jumped, letting out a yelp in fear as he turned slowly to set his gaze on whoever just spoke. He was dead, this was the end. His body began shivering on its own accord and he tried moving in his bonds. It was Saeran, he was shaking slightly as well. “I don't want you to be in pain, here,” He whispered, gulping audibly. He was handing him a glass of water and some pills. Saehyun stared at them helplessly. How was he supposed to take them? Was he just trying to torture him? He probably didn't think this through. “Oh, right…” he lowered the hand that had the pills close to Saehyun’s mouth. If he was anyone else he would have bitten the others hand, but he simply opened his mouth as the medicine was dropped in and he happily drank the water when the glass was brought to his lips.

“Thanks,” his voice came out hoarse as it struggled to make its way through the back of his throat and past his lips. He didn't really know what else to say.

“If you're my brother, I'm sorry,” Saeran’s gaze was casted downwards and although he couldn't really see his expression well through the darkness, he could tell he felt guilty.

“Do you have any tissues?” He didn't feel like replying to that. Had he watched him cry?

“Oh, yeah sure!” He replied, louder than necessary. Saehyun winced, becoming hyper-aware of his surroundings and glancing around himself frantically; before sighing in relief when he didn’t hear anyone else in the building stir. Suddenly the lights in the room were flicked on as Saeran began searching around for some tissues to give to him. No, what are you doing?! He was now internally screaming.

“Saeran?” it was Saeyoung’s voice and it was dripping with worry.

Saehyun listened as the sound of footsteps drew nearer. The hairs on the back of his neck stood up as he began holding his breath. His eyes focused on Saeran, almost pleading for him to do something; when his kidnapper came around from behind the couch, seemingly concerned.

“What are you doing up, Saeran?” His voice took on a soft and gentle tone; almost fatherly.

“I was just getting some tissues,” Saeran explained. He pulled a few from the flimsy, colourful box nearby to demonstrate.

“Well, let's get to bed. We have a party we're going to, tomorrow, remember? You'll be tired if you stay up too late.” Saehyun watched as Saeyoung coerced his brother to bed. He paid him zero mind like he didn't even exist. For some reason that hurt; even though that's what he should prefer over being beaten for even being in the same vicinity of Saeyoung's sibling. Whether it was by choice or not.

Saehyun turned away as they left and he was once again draped in darkness. He didn't get to wipe the tears and snot off his face but at least the medication would help put him to sleep so he could ignore it. Closing his eyes, he fell into a restless slumber.


	2. Injured and Confused

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heyo, sorry this update took a while but I finally got the motivation to write chapter two. Woo! Thanks, everyone, for your amazing comments last chapter. It really helped motivate me even more. Sorry if there a few errors here and there this chapter. I got kind of excited and maybe posted it prematurely lolol. Anyways, I hope you enjoy and please feel free to leave any thoughts you might have in the comment section below. I would much appreciate it (or a kudos if you're not good with words). Thanks for stopping by!
> 
> Warning!: Contains major spoilers and possible triggering themes, read at your own risk.

“Shh, stop crying,” a soothing voice echoed throughout a blurry, white room. Saehyun could see furniture littered about sloppily; but they looked merely like black silhouettes, lacking any detail. “I need you to put this on for me. No one will want you otherwise.” Where was that voice coming from? It was almost as if he couldn’t fully open his eyes. His world, blurry and covered in a white haze. It almost felt as if time itself had slowed down as he moved his head about. Why did it feel so heavy?

His gaze landed on a tall figure standing before him. For some reason, he could tell it was a woman, even though she looked akin to a ghost. She was holding a gray blur in her hand, he couldn’t make out what it was. “Are you always going to be this stubborn? Little brat.” Her voice got harsher as a face seemed to appear on her form. Dark menacing eyes and jagged teeth, downturned into a frown. “I’ve always hated you the most; you’re so small compared to the other two.” The room was filled with the deafening sound of a heartbeat as the figure before him, extended her arm towards him. Her hands turned to sharp claws as her expression became more fierce. “I should kill you. No one will know!” Her voice pierced his ears and he could hear himself take a sharp, deep breath in. Suddenly the doorbell rang and the room went silent. The woman snapped her head to the side as if panicked before slowly fading away. He awoke with a start, looking around frantically.

His eyes scanned the foreign room. At first, he was confused on where the hell he was. Until he went to move his right hand to rub his tired eyes, realizing it was bound behind his back. Right, he was kidnapped. He slowly rolled over to face away from the backrest as he was starting to feel uncomfortable when he was suddenly met face to face with MC.

“Ah! Holy fuck!” He screamed, trying to calm his racing heartbeat. Did she just sit there quietly, waiting for him to wake up? “What is wrong with you?!”

“Oh uh, sorry. You looked so peaceful I was contemplating whether I should wake you up or not.” She explained, glancing away in embarrassment as her cheeks lit up with a blush. “You know you look so much like my husband and his brother. If it's a disguise, it's really impressive.” He was going to ignore the comment about watching him sleep at first until she mentioned more bullshit about his appearance being a disguise. Where the hell did these people think they lived to believe some random person on the street was out to get them?

“Disguises, agents, dangerous enemies. Is your husband living a spy movie or are you all just insane?!” For some reason, he felt himself explode at her stupid responses to things. Everything was confusing and it felt like this was becoming some elaborate, fucked up prank. “If you assholes think this is some joke, I swear to god I will call the police and get you all put in prison!” He could feel tears make its way to his eyes, his voice becoming shaky. “And if you cared half as much as you pretend to, I wouldn't be here!”

A hand suddenly reached towards his neck, as panic crossed MC’s features. She turned her head to the side quickly; moving to stop the arm from advancing any further. He was pulled up by the collar of his shirt before she could do anything. He could feel the fabric bite into his esophagus almost cutting off his air supply as he choked and sputtered; hanging limply above the couch.

“Saeyoung, stop!” It was Saeyoung’s wife’s shrill scream. Fear shot through his veins while he tried to desperately move in his bonds to fight back or get away, anything. His brain kept repeating he was going to die now, over and over. This was the end. Though he wouldn’t go out without a fight as he slammed his head straight into his look-alike’s nose.

“Fuck!” he yelled, dropping from Saeyoung’s grip and hitting the couch. He quickly did away with the bonds on his hands, that had been tied poorly by MC. Proceeding to undo the ones on his feet and completely freeing himself. His heart was racing while adrenaline put every nerve in his body on edge. He jumped over the couch looking for the nearest weapon to completely take this guy out. His legs wobbled slightly at first, from laying down for so long; before he swiftly turned around to face his attacker. Glancing around the room he noticed Saeran wasn’t around; good, so he wouldn’t be outnumbered.

Saeyoung was covering his nose while MC was looking at him through worried eyes. He could see a small trickle of blood make its way down his look-alike’s face. Saehyun could tell that he was in pain. For some reason that caused his heart to clench and his breathing to hitch for a split second. He almost regretted it, almost. He was a human being after all and he didn’t particularly take joy in hurting others; even if they did kidnap him.

The moment Saeyoung moved his hand, even slightly, he was back on the move again. He rushed towards the nearest exit, keeping an eye on the other two in the room very closely as he went. But for the life of him, he couldn’t figure out how to open the complicated mess that was his kidnappers front door. He slammed his fist against it angrily as he was beginning to feel all hope was lost; now noticing his attacker advancing towards him out of the corner of his eye. That was until he realized, if he got his hands on a phone he could call for help.

Spinning around with a new plan, he narrowly ducked out of the way of a move to grab him by Saeyoung. Pushing himself away from the door, he barely made it a few steps before he was slammed into the ground. His head hit the hardwood flooring but he ignored the pain as he desperately clawed his way out from underneath the other person’s body. He scratched, clawed, bit. It really didn’t matter, as long as he escaped. He got a few blows to the head for his trouble; but his brain felt like it was in a different world completely, as it ignored every injury he acquired.

Now back on his feet, his breathing ragged. He reached for a nearby chair, turning and slamming it into his look-alike’s face with as much ferocity as he could muster. He clenched his teeth together as if baring them like a wild animal. A leg from the flimsy wooden chair snapped off, flying across the room. MC screamed as it almost hit her in the head.

Saeyoung instinctively brought a hand towards the side of his face; letting out a loud, pain filled noise. Saehyun winced slightly at the sound; this whole ordeal was making him miserable. Holding the chair above him, he went to strike Saeyoung straight over the head with it.

“Stop!” He heard MC scream at the top of her lungs like her life depended on it. His movement halted. The chair stopping just above the other’s head. He heard footsteps approaching before feeling a weak grip on his arm. He glanced to his side to see a crying woman. Her expression was that of utter agony as tears streamed down her face. Her brown eyes met his golden ones and he could feel guilt rocket down his spine. He hesitated, as he slowly lowered his improvised weapon. Crack!

He was back on the ground again. Slamming into the cold hard surface once more as he was suddenly punched directly in the face. The chair hit the ground with a crash as he hurried to get onto his hands and knees. He immediately reached up to cup his left cheek, noticing it had already swollen up like a balloon. He watched as blood dripped from his mouth, down his chin and onto the floor in a nice little puddle. Though he only stared for a few seconds before pushing himself up onto his feet. He wobbled slightly, accidentally letting out a sob he didn't know he was holding in. Ping!

His salvation just made a noise to let him know where it was as he followed it. Limping over to a kitchen counter, he could suddenly feel the world start spinning. He could hear MC, Saeyoung and a voice he couldn't recognize talking in the background but he ignored it. “So close,” he was crying as his body suddenly caved in on itself. “No!” He screamed at himself as he suddenly hit the floor. “I don't want to die!” His voice was hoarse as he willed every muscle in his body to move. Crawling across the ground, clawing his way towards the kitchen counter. He reached his hand up to the phone laying on it, watching helplessly as it hit the tips of his fingers. “Please,” he begged as his fingers continued to hit it towards him. It finally slid off the counter, hitting the floor in front of him with a thud. His vision started going in and out as his bloodied hands covered the screen in his bodily fluids. Fumbling with the phone hopelessly for a couple seconds; his head suddenly moved towards the ground, involuntarily as he lost consciousness.

 

If he had to describe what he was feeling right now; it would be like laying in the midst of a crashing shore. Storm clouds rolling overhead as wind harshly whipped his face. Chilling every bit of his body down to his bones. It was as if he was slowly drifting out to sea. Waiting for the ocean to engulf him in its depths and rip every last breath from his lungs. He was rising above and below the surface. Gasping every time the cold air hit his face once more. Crying out in agony, he hoped someone would come save him. Then he noticed a boat.

“Good, you’re awake.” Saehyun had no clue whose voice that was as he scrunched up his nose, turning his head to the side. Pain was shooting through every single nerve in his body and he let out a strangled sob in response to it. Honestly, death would have been more merciful. “I thought that Saeyoung had punched you into a coma. Fucking idiot.” He didn’t bother to reply. Clenching his eyes shut tighter, he hoped he could just disappear from existence altogether.

A silence spread between the two as neither spoke. Saehyun could hear the stranger shifting about the room but didn't bother to check what he was doing. “How are you feeling, by the way?” There was the clack of a bowl. “What am I asking? Probably like shit, huh?” He laughed to himself awkwardly. Saehyun finally cracked open his eyes as he felt the other person tap his shoulder. “Hey, come on. I'm actually starting to get kind of worried about you,” though his voice didn't sound concerned.

Saehyun's gaze shifted to the stranger's arm; not bothering to look at his face. For some reason, one that he couldn't explain. He reached out to weakly grip the other's sleeve, before hugging it close to him. He buried his face in the soft fabric, taking in the other's scent. He smelt like sweat with the subtle hint of cheap shampoo. Perfect. It comforted him, as the pain he was feeling disappeared for a split second.

The stranger stiffened in response but didn't pull away. Though he shifted around a little awkwardly. “I brought you some food. You should probably eat. You've been asleep for a day and a half.” Saehyun stayed silent as he focused up at the other's face. For some reason, his breath hitched once his mind started to process the unknown man's features. He had soft, brown hair cascading down the sides of his head. Hazel eyes and smooth pale pink lips. Trailing his gaze down his neck; Saehyun noticed he was wearing a black shirt with a purple collar. He was cut off from admiring the rest as a bowl of soup was promptly shoved in his face. “Stop looking at me like that,” his voice laced with irritation.

“Sorry,” he whispered, cringing at how sore his throat felt. He slowly sat up; resting against the headboard of the bed. Glancing around the room he noticed he wasn't in a hospital but an ordinary bedroom. Great, just wonderful! Any hope that he had been saved was dashed in that moment. He almost felt the need to throw a tantrum in frustration but decided against it. Taking the soup from the other's hand; he began to glare at it as if it was the source of all his problems.

“Uh, it's fine,” he sounded as if he didn't expect an apology. Like getting one was a surprise. Saehyun ignored him, slowly bringing a spoonful of soup to his mouth before blowing the steam away gently. His hands were shaky and he felt weak. “You're not as talkative as I thought you'd be.” What did he expect? A full blown conversation from the person they held captive and almost beat to death a day prior? Then he was living in a fantasy world.

“What's your name?” Saehyun whispered after swallowing his second spoonful of soup. The stranger went to open his mouth when the door suddenly slammed open. His gaze suddenly shifted towards it. His expression turned to that of anger and irritation.

“Saeyoung I told you to-! Oh, MC, it's you,” his expression softened.

“Sorry, I hadn't meant to open it so roughly. I just heard you two talking so I got excited. I was so afraid Saehyun wouldn't be okay.” He could hear her approach the bed but he made no effort to look up at her. Instead, he opted to shove another spoonful of soup into his mouth. “How are you feeling?”

It took a great amount of effort to prevent himself from screaming, 'how do you think I'm feeling?!’ in her face. But he was able to resist the urge.

When he didn't respond she let out a sigh, which only further irritated him. She had no right to feel upset with him in any way. “Listen,” no thanks. “I'm really sorry,”

His grip on his spoon tightened as she went to open her mouth to continue. “Does it look like I give a fuck?” Her mouth instantly closed and she looked down dejectedly. He hadn't meant for that to slip out as he quickly turned away. The wavy pattern of the bed sheets, seemingly becoming a lot more interesting. An uncomfortable silence spread throughout the room as the man sitting next to him cleared his throat.

“My name is Vanderwood, by the way,” it sounded fake but Saehyun didn't press him any further. Instead, he brought the bowl to his lips and started to gulp down its contents. He hoped he could maybe disgust the other two people in the room enough for them to leave. That or he was fucking starving. His reasonings for his actions were starting to feel blurred.

“Oh! you must have been really hungry,” MC suddenly piped up. He had begun to feel awkward when they had both watched him wolf down his food like an animal and said nothing. He almost sighed in relief when she spoke again. She suddenly grabbed the bowl from his hands. “I’ll get you some more okay? Please don’t stay mad at me forever. I know that’s probably a selfish request, coming from me. But I want to believe - no, I know - you’re a good person.” She then turned and briskly walked out of the room before he could reply.

“I hadn’t meant to snap like that,” He whispered to no one in particular. Though Vanderwood’s gaze shifted to him when he spoke.

“She’ll be fine. She was pretty worried about you, while you were out. She’s the one who called me to patch you up actually,” Vanderwood explained. Saehyun didn’t really know how to respond to that. He didn’t really feel grateful in any way to her; but at the same time, he was thankful she was fending Saeyoung off of him. Vanderwood then turned and started putting various medical equipment into a large first aid kit. Silence engulfed the room as the only sound that could be heard was the shifting of various objects and the tick of a clock.

Saehyun’s head downturned towards his hands, facing to where they rested on his lap. He clenched and unclenched them slowly. At that moment he wondered if anyone had even noticed he had gone missing. Did anyone really care about him enough to notice? He could feel doubt creep into his mind and worm its way through his every conscious thought. No, they would. Even though he didn’t live with his parents, he called his mother pretty well every day. His sister was also very close to him. They weren’t related by blood but they may as well be twins. They were always together since the day they met each other. A smile graced his lips as his mind seemed to calm. Remembering these things gave him hope. He let out a long drawn out breath. It calmed his racing mind and heartbeat as he glanced around the room. He really had to pee.

Moving his hands, he went to push himself off the bed. Pain immediately rocketed up his spine as he grit his teeth, falling back onto the mattress with a soft creak. “You shouldn’t try and get up by yourself. Your wounds are still healing and I don’t feel like patching you up again.” Vanderwood continued to look away from him as he spoke.

Saehyun let out a groan as his full bladder almost released all over the bed. He winced, moving his legs around uncomfortably as if that would give him some sort of relief. “Could you help me get to a washroom? I really don’t feel like pissing myself.”

“I could help,” He almost jumped when MC had somehow quietly made her way into the room. The complete opposite of how she entered the first time. She put down the steaming bowl of soup she had brought for him as she walked over to offer him a hand. Vanderwood ignored them both as he continued putting his stuff away.

He stared at her outstretched hand, tempted to slap it away. She was looking at him with such bright eyes it almost made him furious. It almost felt like she was trying to tame a stray and he was just some wild animal she picked up on the street. Bringing him in out of her own ‘kindness’ and ‘generosity’. However, the uncomfortable feeling around his stomach brought him back to reality as his gaze shifted to anywhere but her face. He willed himself up onto his own two feet despite the pain. He began to repeat the word ‘fuck’ over and over in his head like a mantra.

“Wait! Hold on, you’re in pain. You shouldn’t just walk around like that!” MC quickly went and steadied him just as he almost fell forward onto his face. She sighed in relief that she had caught him in time. Vanderwood was giving him a look out of the corner of his eye but he couldn’t discern the emotion behind it. “You have to be careful. Gosh, you’re as stubborn as my husband.” She let out a breathy laugh. He didn’t respond, he simply looked away. She frowned slightly but didn’t press him. It was almost as if she had gotten used to this sort of treatment from somebody else. “I’ll lead you to the bathroom. I guess once you’re there you can handle everything else on your own right?” Her voice was playful as she winked at him.

He could feel his cheeks instantly light up the moment his brain registered what she was suggesting. There was no way in hell he wanted help going to the bathroom. “What?! Of course, I can!” He exclaimed, his golden eyes racing up to meet hers. She suddenly began to laugh upon hearing his response. It radiated through her body as she began to struggle to hold him upright. His whole face felt like it was on fire. “Stop laughing! You’re going to drop me!” The embarrassment he felt practically dripped through his tone of voice causing her to laugh even harder. “Come on, I really have to go,” he whined, tugging her arm gently.

“Okay, okay,” she replied, giving him a bright smile. She had tears pricking the corner of her eyes but this time for a good reason. He couldn’t help the smile that made its way onto his own lips in turn.

He was eventually lead to the nearest bathroom where he was finally given some privacy. MC mentioned getting him some new clothes and showing him how to use the shower before leaving. He quickly did away with his filthy, blood covered attire before flopping down onto the toilet. He was in too much pain to stand. Now alone, he took this time to glance tiredly around the room. Running his eyes over every detail, nook and cranny. They eventually landed on a mirror where he could see himself reflected upon its surface. He couldn't quite make out every detail without his glasses, but he could see enough to notice he had large purple bruises and welts peppering his face. His body was also covered in injuries. On the bright side, he didn't look half as bad as he felt though. If there even was a bright side to this whole mess.

Getting up slowly and on shaking legs; he turned to flush the toilet before limping towards the shower. He fiddled around with the knobs for a few seconds before finally getting the temperature he wanted and stepping in. He watched as the water ran down his form, creating a pool of brown at his feet. Running a hand through his amber hair, he could feel clumps of blood mixed with dried up hair gel. For some reason, he almost wanted to vomit. He swallowed back the feeling, as he reached for the nearest bottle of shampoo. He stopped just before his hand made contact with it. It was the exact same shampoo he used. Even though that wasn't that creepy in and of itself, it still sent a chill down his spine. So in response, he quickly moved his hand to the bottle next to it. He grabbed a pink bottle covered in what appeared to be flowers. It was most likely MC’s shampoo or maybe Saeran's. Who was he to judge?

Saehyun squirted some of the pink and white swirled liquid onto his hands before lathering it into his hair. He sighed contently as the gunk that was clumped in between each strand was washed out. After cleaning the rest of his body, he shut the running water off. Stepping out of the shower, he froze mid-step when he noticed he wasn't alone in the bathroom. MC was staring at him like a deer caught in headlights. In her arms were some clean clothes, neatly folded up. Though he paid that no mind as he immediately threw the nearest object at her. A bar of soap. “What the hell do you think you're doing?!” He yelled, his face as red as his hair. The bar of soap flew by her head, landing on the expensive marble flooring with a clack. He never meant to hit her with it, just scare her. She jumped, quickly turning away as she put the clothes down on the counter.

“Sorry I was just taking out your old clothes and putting in some new ones. I wasn't trying to peek or anything. I just thought you'd be in the shower longer,” she sputtered. She was obviously flustered and embarrassed as she explained herself. He immediately stepped back in the shower, slamming the frosted glass door. “I'll leave them here. I'll wait for you outside the bathroom. I'm really sorry,” she called after him. He heard the door open and close a few seconds later.

He grumbled irritatedly, opening the shower door ajar to be a hundred percent sure she wasn't still there. When he was satisfied the room was empty he quickly moved to put on the new clothes. A black tank top, baggy blue jeans and a black belt. He shuffled through the various items looking for a new pair of boxers. He paused when he finally found them. His right eye twitched as he looked over the pattern printed across the garment. It was covered in little cartoonish cats with the word 'meow’ haphazardly placed all over it. He almost felt the urge to burn it. He resisted that urge, however. It was not like anyone was going to see it under his pants anyways.

Finally dressed, he opened the bathroom door slightly before peeking out. Just down the hallway, he could make out three familiar figures. Vanderwood, MC and Saeran. They were all sitting around a large dining table covered in multiple plates of food. They were exchanging small talk. MC doing most of the chatting. He sighed in relief that Saeyoung wasn’t there. He really didn’t feel like being in the same room as him, especially not after what just happened. Though escape didn’t look likely with both Saeran and Vanderwood in the room. Maybe if he could sneak out of the bathroom, he could quietly search through the other rooms for a phone. Though being quiet wasn’t really an option when he could barely walk. If they found him getting into places he probably shouldn’t be, he suspected he would get another beating. So he opted to make his presence known; stepping out of the bathroom with an audible creak of the door, before leaning against the nearest wall for support. Maybe if he gained their trust he would be given more slack to do what he needed. At least he wasn’t tied up anymore. Though his injuries weren’t making much of a difference.

MC’s eyes flicked up towards Saehyun before she placed the plate she was holding down on the table. She rushed over towards him, quickly helping him steady himself. “Sorry, I said I would wait for you but I got distracted. I know it’s hard to walk right now. How much pain are you in? I can get you some pain meds,” She asked. Her eyes scanned his face but he didn’t know for what, as the other two men in the room turned to look at him. “Gosh you feel so thin…” she was gripping his arm, running a hand up and down it. Guilt was now plastered across her features. He really wasn’t that much thinner then he remembered being but he didn’t bother commenting. He didn’t really care to. “Well, I’ll just make you extra!” She exclaimed cheerfully, giving him a bright smile. He simply nodded in response to her declaration. Her smile faded somewhat but didn’t disappear completely. Maybe she thought she was making some sort of progress.

Helping him sit down at the table with the others, she rushed off to get him a plate. Now seated, he didn’t have the courage to look up from the table. He began to feel incredibly awkward as the silence that rapidly spread around him felt like it was eating him whole. An uncomfortable sort of anxious feeling spread in his stomach. He almost lost his appetite completely because of it.

“There’s no way he’s not,” Vanderwood suddenly piped up. Saehyun almost fainted he was so relieved the silence had been broken. “No one could pull off a disguise that well. Even his face shape is identical.” Looking up, Saehyun noticed Vanderwood’s eyes were glancing back and forth between him and Saeran. Saeran looked very uncomfortable; like he knew what the answer was but he didn’t want to say it out loud. Like unless it was confirmed on paper, he didn’t want to accept it. Honestly, he was right there with Saeran. He didn’t want either of these criminals to turn out being his blood relatives.

“I-I don’t know,” Saeran finally stuttered out; fiddling with his chopsticks before popping a piece of meat in his mouth. The silence was back again as he turned his gaze away from the other two, looking around the room. Everything in here seemed extremely expensive. He honestly expected the home of a bunch of criminals to be filthy and covered in garbage. But this place was the complete opposite of his expectations. Maybe they were drug lords and they believed he had access to the drugs they wanted? What was he even thinking? None of this made sense.

“Do you guys peddle drugs? Because I’m not a licensed doctor yet so don’t expect me to make any prescriptions,” Saehyun blurted out, causing the other two men to look at him. They were both now giving him an incredulous look.

“What?” Saeran asked, confusion laced in his voice.

“Uh, nevermind…” He could feel a warmth rush to his cheeks as he buried his face into the palms of his hands. Okay, so maybe they weren’t drug dealers of any kind. He could practically feel the looks they were giving him before the sound of eating resumed.

“I’m back,” MC said in a singsong voice. She stopped and glanced around when she realized how oddly silent it was. “Is everything okay in here?” She asked unsure, as she set the plate down in front of Saehyun.

“Yeah, everything’s fine,” Vanderwood replied. “How was the party, by the way? I heard that was yesterday. Anything happen?” He asked, finishing up the last of his food.

“It went well actually. We raised two times the amount of money for charity than last time!” MC announced rather proudly. Saeran clapped quietly in response, causing her to laugh and blush slightly. “I’m sorry you couldn’t come by the way. I’m sure Saeyoung made it up to you since it was his fault after all.”

Vanderwood rolled his eyes, “this wouldn’t be the first time. But yes, he paid me.”

“That’s good, thanks so much by the way. I know you were busy, but I was so worried.”

“I know. You sounded hysterical over the phone. I thought you found Saeran dying in his room.” Saeran let out a sort of half laugh in response.

“Oh, no. I think Saeyoung would be much more upset then he was if that were the case,” she replied. Her gaze shifted over to Saehyun who was staring at his empty plate, not making a sound. “Please help yourself, Saehyun. There’s no need to be afraid. I didn’t poison anything,” She joked, passing him a bowl filled with salad to start.

He stared at it for a couple seconds before taking it out of her hands, whispering a thanks. He began to slowly pile his plate with food before quietly eating. He kept his gaze focused downwards away from everybody else in the room. Focusing all his senses on chewing and swallowing, and trying his hardest to suppress how uncomfortable and out of place he felt. For some reason, the family-like atmosphere that surrounded the three of them made him depressed. He almost wanted to start crying again. The next time he swallowed, his throat felt thick and heavy as he suppressed himself from letting out a choked sob. He normally wasn’t this emotional, but his situation wasn’t normal.

The front door was suddenly opened. The faint sound of a robotic voice making its way to his ears. Why was the door talking? What the hell.

“Hey babe, I’m done!” Every nerve in Saehyun’s body was put on edge in that moment. His breathing quickened as he froze in place. His stomach started to turn as he almost felt the need to fling the food across the room. Like having it in front of him was a sin. To say he was scared was an understatement. There was no way he could defend himself in his current state. “It took forever to get my baby cleaned,” Saeyoung whined as he stepped into the dining area. Saehyun didn’t dare to look over his shoulder as MC practically ran over to her husband. He sat there hoping he could turn invisible as he waited for Saeyoung to become aggressive towards him once more. Every signal in his brain was going off; expecting the other to lash out after he was finished paying attention to his lover.

He heard them talk for a bit before there was the sound of a kiss and then approaching footsteps. He hoped to the gods above it was MC. But he highly doubted any god would care about his silent prayer.

A hand was swiftly slapped down onto his shoulder. He let out a yelp in fear of the sudden contact. Turning slowly to look up behind him as if that would somehow prevent the inevitable. Two pairs of identical golden eyes met and his body began to shiver on its own accord. “I'm glad you're okay. I didn't mean to rough you up like that, I just…” Saeyoung trailed off, his gaze roaming Saehyun's form. “You look a lot better.” Saehyun's only response was to stare at his look-alike like he had just seen a ghost. His mouth went dry as he tried to utter something. Nothing would get past his throat which felt like it had closed completely. He weakly nodded before turning away slowly. As if any sudden movements would get him killed. “Listen, I-we started out on the wrong foot. And-” Saeyoung was cut off as a chair was loudly scrapped across the floor.

“Saehyun probably needs some rest. I'll get him to bed,” Vanderwood spoke up. Saehyun hadn't realized he had been hyperventilating until now as he was gripped by the arm and pulled up out of his seat. Vanderwood began leading him back to the bedroom he had first come out of, ignoring any protests from Saeyoung. He gripped onto the other man like some sort of lifeline. He could already feel himself calming just by being outside of that room.

Walking back into the familiar bedroom once more; he noticed the bowl of soup MC had put down before helping him get to the bathroom, was gone. His bed sheets also looked new and fresh. He guessed his old ones were covered in blood or some other bodily fluid. He was slowly placed down onto the bed. He let out a silent “thanks”, before flopping down onto his side. The mattress was surprisingly plush and comfortable. Maybe he could ask what type it was and get a similar one installed in his own home.

Saehyun jumped when he felt a pair of hands on his left arm. It was moved more closely to the light and Vanderwood's face as he inspected the wounds there. From what Saehyun could tell the stitching looked fine, professional actually. He assumed that he had double checked everything while he was asleep. There was no point in waiting until he woke up and everything was put away. So why check again?

Looking up at Vanderwood’s face with a slightly confused expression. He watched as the other man’s eyes trailed up his arm until they met his own. They stared at each other for what felt like an eternity before Vanderwood quickly looked away, mumbling something incoherent.

“I was just making sure I didn't open any wounds pulling you up by your arm back there,” He explained rather sheepishly.

Saehyun nodded that made sense. “You did a really good job on it, by the way. I've seen a few trained professionals who are much sloppier than you are,” Saehyun complimented.

Vanderwood put a hand behind his head. He scratched the back of it as he tried to hide his face with his hair. Saehyun could still make out the faint blush behind his brown strands. “I didn't expect a compliment, but thanks.” Saehyun smiled slightly before letting out a yawn. Hiding his face in the nearest pillow while he did it before turning back. Vanderwood looked more composed now. His face was back in view and he cleared his throat as if he was ready to change the subject. Or maybe he felt uncomfortable. “You mentioned something about being a doctor. So I guess I should refer to you as, Dr. Choi,” he joked. Saehyun began to blush profusely, getting extremely flustered.

“I-uh-I, wow-um-no, I’m not a doctor yet. I’m still in medical school,” Saehyun explained. A large grin making its way onto his face, “but that felt really nice to hear.” Vanderwood was staring at him now. He appeared to have something on his mind but he looked uncertain whether he should voice it. Instead, he opted to let out a cough before turning his head to look over at the bedroom door. His expression quickly changed to anger when his eyes seemed to focus on something. Saehyun’s eyes followed his gaze. Peeking in through a crack in the door was his look-alike. Saeyoung had been listening in on their conversation and he suspected MC was with him. He didn’t know how much they had heard, or if they had been there all along. Either option made him extremely uncomfortable. He shifted around under the blankets, trying to shield himself fully from everyone else in the room.

“Saeyoung! Get the hell out!” Vanderwood yelled, marching over to the door with his fist raised.

“But Vandy, it's not fair. I want to apologize and it's my house,” Saeyoung whined, jutting out his bottom lip childishly as he began to pout. Vanderwood grit his teeth in response but said nothing more as Saeyoung pushed his way in. The mood suddenly switched to something more serious, as Saehyun's eyes landed on Saeyoung's face. His breath hitched as he could feel fear creep up through his body once more.

“Listen, Saehyun,” Saeyoung seemed uncertain when saying his name. Like it was part of some foreign language. Or maybe he was just weirded out by their names similarities. “This was all a huge misunderstanding on my end and I truly, sincerely want to apologize. I should've listened to MC,” he laughed, but it didn't sound cheerful or happy in the slightest. For some reason, he looked about ready to bawl his eyes out. “You're not a bad person, at least from what I could dig up. Unless you're really good at covering your tracks.” Saeyoung's eyes scanned his form. “I don't know why we look so similar and maybe it should be obvious to me. But it's like-” he paused. “Uh, nevermind.”

Saehyun stared at him, waiting for him to continue. He began to grow irritated when he didn't. Did he honestly expect an apology to just fix this? Like sorry, guess you weren't a bad guy after all. Didn't mean to bust your face into the ground, drag you into my car and tie you up on my couch. Whoops. “So, I can go home now?” He spat. His words dripping with anger and spite.

Saeyoung began to fiddle nervously, looking anywhere but at him; which only helped to make Saehyun's mood drop to even lower depths. “No, not exactly.” What was up with this guy? Why did it feel like his personality shifted on a dime? Just a couple days ago he had no qualms about punching his face in.

“Not exactly? So what, are you going to kill me and send my body home instead?” He asked sarcastically.

“What?! No, of course not! I can't believe you would think I would. I would never, especially if you're my-” he cut himself off, gulping audibly.

“I wasn't being serious,” Saehyun whispered. Though his voice sounded somewhat unsure. Maybe in a way, he did feel that might be the truth. “Also, so what if we're brothers? What happens then?” There was a long drawn out pause. He could almost hear the gears in Saeyoung's head turning as he tried to come up with some sort of response. Saehyun had all day to wait. Not like he could go anywhere else. Saeyoung began to fidget with his sleeves. Chewing his bottom lip as he tried to process what words to say.

“We'll uh, cross that bridge when we get there,” he finally spoke. Although he seemed somewhat confident with his response, it did nothing to quell the questions swirling around in Saehyun's head. Then what? That answered nothing. It's not like they had some special childhood memories together. Them being blood relatives meant nothing in the grand scheme of things. Especially since they met on such poor terms. He probably was just trying to cover his tracks, Saehyun thought. For some reason that made him depressed as he found it hard to keep looking over at Saeyoung. He opted to cast his gaze downwards instead.

“I don't accept your apology,” Saehyun blurted out. Gripping the blankets underneath him as he tried to hold back tears.

“We can work on that,” Saeyoung replied. For some reason, his mind went blank as his eyes met Saeyoung's. He was a lot closer to him now. He almost felt the urge to reach out but refrained from acting upon it. He instead backed away.

“No thanks,” he could feel the words pierce through his throat like knives on their way out. He backed up as far away as he could from the other man, turning away completely. His heart clenched when Saeyoung's lip quivered in response to his actions. But he pushed any thoughts to take his words back from his mind. He needed to remember what situation he was put in because of a supposed 'misunderstanding’. He didn't even know if he was just toying with him or not. Like he would go from treating him decently to treating him like shit again, with the flip of a switch. He couldn't trust him.

“Saeyoung,” MC was standing at the door. She was most likely signalling for him to end the conversation. He hesitated but eventually left the room with her. Vanderwood stood there; an emotion on his face he couldn’t quite decipher before turning to leave as well.

“I’ll come check on your wounds tomorrow,” Vanderwood said, closing the bedroom door behind him. With a click, the door successfully blocked him from Saehyun’s view before he had a chance to reply. Now left alone with his thoughts, he turned and screamed into the nearest pillow with all his might.


	3. Your Words Mean Nothing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everybody, another update woo! This one is full of dialogue and emotions. But I try to not have it be angsty for too long. Anyways, as always I would really appreciate any comments or feedback you have (try not to be too rude, I'm trying to improve). If you're not the best with words a kudos works too (but comments feed my soul and keep the chapters coming ;P). Thanks for stopping by and I hope you enjoy!
> 
> Warning!: Contains major spoilers and possible triggering themes, read at your own risk.

“Hmmnnn…” Saehyun groaned, stretching his limbs out over the bed below him. He blinked the tiredness from his eyes as he sat up. He must've fallen asleep by accident. Running a hand through his auburn hair sleepily, he moved to walk towards the bathroom. ‘Creak…’

Peeking out into the hallway, he could hear the sounds of a TV blaring in the living room; along with what sounded like MC and Saeyoung having a conversation. He didn’t know whether Saeran was with them or where Vanderwood had gone. Though he assumed neither of them was in the same vicinity as the happy couple.

Stepping out, he moved to make his way down to the bathroom when extremely lewd noises forced their way into his ears. The sounds of what was most certainly passionate lovemaking. So they weren’t having a conversation then. He stopped dead in his tracks, his face darkening to a deep shade of red. If he went to the bathroom he would most certainly catch them in the act. The room was in view of the open living area. But he also really needed to use it. He groaned in annoyance as he turned back around, walking in the opposite direction. Maybe he could find another washroom.

“Saeyoung, not so rough. Ahh~” He began to speed walk now, well, more like speed limp.

He let out a breath when he reached a part of the building he hadn’t been in before. Turning his head to the side, he noticed lights dimly blinking behind a door left ajar. It looked dark, so he guessed no one was in there. It wasn’t a washroom but curiosity got the best of him as he peeked inside. “Woah…” He whispered to no one in particular, glancing around the room at the monitors strewn about it. Letters and numbers ran across them. They looked akin to the credits of a movie but he couldn’t understand anything they said. He moved closer to get a better look. The strings of code enticing him further into a place he shouldn’t be. Wait, maybe this could be his chance to call for help.

“What are you doing?” Or maybe his chance to meet an early grave. Turning around, his golden eyes met a pair of mint green ones. Saeran was giving him a look that clearly read he wasn’t in a good mood. His lips were downturned and his gaze, harsh. There was something different about him, but Saehyun couldn’t put his finger on it. It was like the very air that surrounded him had shifted to something much more dark and menacing.

“I was looking for a washroom and I got lost. I didn’t touch anything, I swear.” He waved his hands out in front of himself. Saeran glanced around the room as if checking to make sure he wasn’t lying. When he was satisfied everything was still in order; he quickly reached forward, snatching Saehyun's arm. Saehyun let out a startled yelp in response, as he was forcefully pulled from the room. His body began to shiver on its own accord while the door was slammed shut behind him. Saeran was giving him a look like he was ready to kill him.

But instead of taking any action, he silently turned and began walking down the hallway. When Saehyun stood there, rooted to the ground. He was given an impatient look, which prompted him to follow.

“What was all that stuff back there?” Saehyun asked. His voice cracked on its way out. He was still shaken up by the sudden roughness Saeran had shown him. This fear seemed to make Saeran pleased as a subtle smirk graced the other's lips. He had come to believe he was the more gentle one of the two brothers. Maybe he was wrong.

“You don’t know?”

“I barely ever touch my computer. What does all that mean? Are they words? What do they do?” He stopped, almost bumping straight into Saeran’s back. “Why did you stop?” He asked, glancing around. He didn’t notice any bathrooms. Moving his eyes back towards Saeran, he noticed the other was giving him a look filled with malice. Had he said something wrong? Maybe he was still mad at him for trespassing? He gulped audibly, fear creeping up his spine. But Saeran turned away, opting to do nothing.

They continued their trek to find a bathroom, silence hanging heavy in the air. It only took a few seconds before Saehyun couldn't stand it. He looked around for anything to start a conversation. His eyes landed on a bouquet of white lilies resting in an expensive looking vase. Perfect.

“Those flowers are pretty. They're called lilies right? I heard certain flowers have certain meanings.” For some reason, Saeran's expression shifted to an emotion he couldn't discern. But at least it wasn't negative. “I think white lilies mean youth? I can't remember.”

“No, purity and innocence,” he replied. His tone of voice became soft and calm. “But they're not lilies.”

“Really? That's impressive how you know information like that,” he laughed. “Do you know much about flowers? I always have such a hard time keeping plants alive. Maybe you can teach me.”

“I-impressive?” Saeran sputtered, a soft blush staining his cheeks. “I've barely even said anything.”

“Then say more. I want to hear it. I can pay you to be my tutor if you want. I'm sure your expertise doesn't come for free.” He winked at him, a bright smile making its way to his lips. Saeran seemed to become flustered, beginning to spout random facts about the plant in front of them like a fan being asked why they enjoyed their favourite movie. Saehyun listened intently, complimenting him every now and then which only caused him to become more flustered in turn. This seemed more like the Saeran he first met. Maybe he just caught him while he was in a bad mood?

Saehyun couldn't pry his eyes from Saeran’s face. He honestly looked kind of cute talking so passionately about the thing he loves. For a reason, he could not explain, a kind of warmth began to surge throughout him. The thought that he was making Saeran happy, caused an involuntary smile to make its way to his lips.

“Wh-what? Stop smiling at me like that.” Saeran looked away, feeling somewhat embarrassed.

“Oh, sorry. Just really liked what we were talking about. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable.” Saehyun's expression shifted to worry. Shit, had he ruined the moment?

“No, it's fine. Just no one's ever this interested in plants.” What if he was going overboard? He didn't want to come off as insincere. So he began repeating everything that Saeran had said, making sure the other knew he was listening and that he was indeed interested.

“I think I got everything. If I ever get the chance to raise one, maybe we can raise it together.”

“I can get you one tomorrow!” Saeran exclaimed, his face a bright red. It was clearly said out of uncontrolled excitement. “Uh, I mean…” he turned his gaze away.

“It's okay, I-” he cut himself off when he noticed Saeran's expression contort with pain. He instinctively reached his hands towards Saeran. “What’s wrong?!” His hands were slapped away, however.

“Stay back! I don’t want you to come any closer!” His voice was shrill and laced with pain.

“I just want to help.”

“No, I don’t need it...Ah, my head!” Saeran threaded his digits through his hair as he gripped and pulled at it. It looked like he would tear it from his own scalp. His mouth was downturned into a frown and he looked about ready to cry.

Saehyun was immediately on him despite his past requests to stay away. He began examining his head and trying to keep him from hurting himself any further. “Stop, don't tug at your hair. How does it hurt? Are there any other symptoms? Are you dizzy? Loss of feeling? Difficulty breathing?” Saeran's only response was to groan loudly in pain. “I know it hurts but please try and talk to me. Are you having difficulty speaking? Nod if you are!” Saehyun's didn't realize he was gradually raising his voice until now. Usually, he was calm in situations like these. He could usually think through them and find a solution. But the more Saeran groaned in pain, the more his mind became jumbled with fear. It was getting to a point where he couldn't think straight.

“Get away from me!” Saehyun was forcefully pushed into the nearest wall. His head banged loudly against it with a thud. Everything that was hung on it rattled and threatened to fall from their positions. “No, don't hurt him. Shut up marshmallow boy!” Saehyun had confusion practically etched into his face as he pushed himself away from the wall. He must be suffering mentally. Maybe he was looking at it wrong from the start. Either way, he probably needed to see a professional stat and he wasn't a therapist.

“I'll go get your brother. He can take you to the hospital or wherever you need to go.” He turned to rush back to the living area but was gripped by his arm and slammed onto the ground. He coughed and sputtered as the air left his lungs. He tried to push himself back up again; but he was slammed back down before he could, by a hand at his throat.

“I don't need his help! I don't need your help! You both abandoned me! You both left me to die!” He was yelling, his voice filled with pain and hatred. Despite the other's hand being at his throat, he didn't squeeze. It was almost as if he was struggling with himself on whether or not he should. Saeran suddenly raised his free hand, forming it into a fist. “I hate you!” Saehyun shut his eyes tight, waiting for the blow to come. But it never did. Instead, he felt a warm liquid roll down his cheeks, dropping onto him from above. Opening his eyes once more, he noticed Saeran was crying. His fist still held in midair, shaking slightly.

He turned and crawled off of Saehyun, curling up into a ball. He hid his face against his legs, as he pressed his back to the nearest wall. He could hear him sobbing now as Saehyun sat up. “S-Saeran?” He called, unsure.

“Go away!” If Saehyun was in his right mind, he would. This was his kidnapper. He should be trying to get as far away from him as possible. But instead, against his better judgment. He wrapped his arms around the other man. Pulling his head to rest upon his chest. “I said go away!” He gripped Saehyun's shirt weakly but didn't do much else. “You think I'm weak. You think you can look down at me like I'm a pathetic bug, don't you?” His voice was hoarse.

“Weak? If you wanted to, you probably could've punched my head in,” he joked. “I haven't known you for very long but don't sell yourself short. You seem incredibly smart, not just with what you know but with how you use that knowledge. Besides, don't let what I might think or do control you. You'll never get anywhere that way.” The moment he finished saying that his head was filled with memories of trying to meet the expectations his parents had of him. He was the most unhappy he had ever been during that time. A constant uphill struggle of never being good enough. “Do the things you do, for you and for your ideals of what makes a good life something worth living. But if my opinion really matters all that much...I think you're a lot stronger than you give yourself credit for.” The words kept tumbling out of his mouth. He couldn't seem to stop them. Maybe they would come off as just that, words. But the slim chance they might give Saeran some sliver of confidence, kept him talking. “I'm sorry if that comes off as meaningless to you. I'm not sure what else I can give you right now or I would give you more.” There was a long drawn out pause as Saeran composed himself. He then pushed himself away from Saehyun and back onto his feet. Stepping away, he crossed his arms over his chest, putting a distance between them.

“Thanks,” he whispered. Saehyun smiled at him which only caused him to quickly look away. His smile faded at Saeran's response.

“Sorry, I'm just making you uncomfortable.” He got up and turned to walk away, a rock forming in his stomach. “I'll see you later.” Saeran opened his mouth as if he wanted to say something but immediately shut it. He instead watched in silence as Saehyun left.

 

'Knock, knock’, Saehyun jumped as he looked up from the book he had found, towards the door. “Saehyun, are you in there? It's dinner and I'd like for you to eat something,” It was MC. Dinner? That meant having to go out there and sit with his look-alikes. Both of which he had made things awkward with. But he was also starving. He put his book down on the end table next to him, weighing the odds. “Saehyun?” MC's voice was somewhat laced with concern, as she knocked again.

“Yeah, sorry. I'm coming.” He moved to get up, his muscles aching in protest.

“No, no, wait, hold on!” MC replied, panicked. The door was swiftly opened as she stepped in. Saehyun froze, watching as she walked over towards him and helped him up. “There,” she smiled. “I don't want you to strain yourself.” Saehyun gave her a look but didn't say anything. He simply followed her lead as she lead him to the dining area.

MC sat him down across the table from two familiar figures. He could hear Saeyoung asking what was wrong to Saeran, who wanted nothing to do with his brother. Saeran definitely looked worse than when he had left him. His eyes were swollen pink and he looked even more exhausted than usual.

Saehyun could feel his heart drop into his stomach. It was all his fault. It had to be. Well, they technically brought him here, but he didn't have to interact with Saeran and ruin everything. He could feel a cold sweat break out on his skin as his gaze followed Saeran, watching him take a plate and promptly leave. Which also left Saeyoung in shambles.

“What's going on?” MC asked, her voice laced with concern. Saehyun gulped audibly as Saeyoung turned around. Tears pricked the corners of his eyes, his hair dishevelled.

“I don't know, he won't tell me.”

“I thought things were finally getting better between you two.” MC's expression looked grim for a split second before switching back to her usual smile. “But I'm sure he'll cool off and we can figure out what's wrong. Maybe he's just having a bad night.” Her optimism felt fake to Saehyun.

“Yeah, I'll talk with him later.” They both sat down, as the table was shrouded in silence. MC tried to make conversation with her husband, but he was too distracted with his thoughts to really continue it.

Saehyun sat there, staring at his plate like he had seen a ghost. Guilt was eating him alive the longer they sat there without speaking. This is all his fault, was repeated over and over again in his head. He eventually couldn't handle it anymore. After chugging down his drink, he slammed the glass on the table, catching their attention.

“Saehyun, what's-” MC started, but was promptly cut off.

“I'm sorry! I didn't know talking to him would make him so distressed. I hadn't meant to make him upset like that, I just wanted to help!” He didn't mean to raise his voice but for some reason, he was extremely emotional right now. Tears brimmed his eyes and threatened to fall. His voice came out shaky. Why was he so upset about this? Everything was so confusing.

They both stared at him, stunned. Oh no, they weren't taking this well. He really did ruin everything for them. Then MC's face lit up with a bright smile before she started laughing.

“You didn't ruin anything,” she said, her voice amused. Shit, he said that out loud. His face lit up with a blush as he almost felt like he would melt on the spot. Saeyoung also had a small smile on his face.

“I'm glad you're worried about him,” Saeyoung said.

“Of course I am. I can't stand watching people suffer. I just wanted to help but I think I made things worse.” Saehyun looked away, wedging his hands between his legs. He bobbed one of his legs up and down nervously. “I'm sorry, I'm a stranger. I should've known my place but I'm going to step out of line again and say you should make an appointment with a therapist. Or I suppose he's an adult, you should convince him to see someone.”

“Saeran has been seeing a therapist-” Saeyoung started.

“Don't explain any medical history to me. I'm sure he'd rather keep it private.” Saehyun quickly interjected. Saeyoung nodded, giving him a surprised look. Why did they look so surprised that he cared? What did they take him for? A criminal? That was their job. Or maybe they believed he would act like a caged animal and lash out every chance he got. Well, he would not live up to whatever low expectations they had of him. Sorry to disappoint.

“What happened between you two, exactly?” Saeyoung asked. His face went pale. ‘I was snooping around and he found me in a place I wasn't supposed to be in.’ He couldn't say that it would probably get him killed. How was he supposed to explain himself? Maybe just leave that part out? But what if Saeran snitched on him later? He didn't know what to do.

“I had to use the washroom and I accidentally ran into him in the hall. We had a chat that went south pretty fast,” he explained. It was half of the truth but he'd tell him the full story later when he was sure he wouldn't kill him over it. Or unless Saeran said something on his behalf. He gulped audibly at the thought.

“Wait, was that the loud bang we heard?” MC piped up, her face contorting with worry.  
Saehyun nodded, “Yeah, Saeran got a little rough with me but I'm fine. Nothing I'm not used to by this point, I guess.” Saeyoung immediately started frowning. He cast his gaze towards the table as Saehyun finished the last of his food. “Anyways, I guess I’ll head back to my room. Not like I can go anywhere else.” He moved to get up, turning away from the table.

“Wait!” A chair scraped behind him, as Saeyoung got up and grabbed his arm. The moment Saeyoung’s hand made contact with his arm, he immediately went into fight or flight mode. He ripped it from the other's grip and almost fell over in the process, but was able to successfully get away. Saeyoung gave him a look but one that seemed to hold hope. For some reason, he felt the urge to shatter it. If he thought in any way that he was warming up to him, then he was delusional. Saehyun wanted to become a doctor because he cared about other people’s well-being. They weren’t special, he reasoned with himself. “I wanted to thank you for telling me.”

“Don’t. I didn’t do it for you or him, I did it for me. Because these are the ideals I hold. Don’t think for a second I will ever warm up to you or your brother. I might have if we had met on better terms, but that time is long past.” His voice came out harsh and cold. Saeyoung’s eyes became dark and glazed over as he stared at him almost lifelessly. Somehow it was like he could feel the other’s sorrow that his every word caused to grow stronger. But he ignored it as he slowly left the room. He didn’t look back.

 

Saehyun plunged his spoon into his bowl full of cereal. He watched as the small, colourful, sugar-filled bits tried to escape their fate as they evaded the metallic object in his hand. Though, a spoonful was unable to get away as he brought them to his mouth. Crunch!

His eyes flicked up to the TV in front of him as it played some random soap opera he had found. It wasn't very good but it was something he could focus on to drive his attention away from his current situation.

The couch suddenly shifted slightly as he glanced over to his side. Saeran sat there, playing with his pancakes absentmindedly. He had a sort of distant look but he otherwise seemed a lot better than he did last night.

“Did you talk to your brother yet?” He asked. He waited for the other to reply but when he didn't, he coughed loudly. Saeran jumped, glancing around.

“Huh, what? Did you say something?”

“Yeah, have you spoken to your brother yet?” He repeated.

“Uh, yeah.”

“That's good.” He didn't know why but he felt a sort of relief from that response as he shovelled more food into his mouth. He wanted to ask if Saeran had any plans to see a therapist soon but maybe that would be too nosy. He didn't want to upset him again.

“Did you mean those things you said about me, last night?” Saeran suddenly piped up, his voice unsure.

“I have no reason to lie. If I wanted to, I could've just walked away from the situation; but I wasn't just going to leave you in that state.” He paused to eat more of his food. “Don't think I merely did it out of pity either, since that's probably what's going through your head now.” Saeran gave him a surprised look like he had read his mind. “I picked my career because I like helping people and I care about their well-being. So I care about yours too.” He placed his empty bowl down on the coffee table. “But yes, I did mean everything I said.” He offered him a small smile before turning back to the TV.

“Why?”

“Why what?”

“Why bother helping people? Why bother helping the people that ripped you from the life you used to live? Why bother caring about people at all? So they can betray you? Leave you behind? Turn their back on you and leave you for death? Left to some unknown fate, so that they can be happier without you. Because you’re nothing but a weak-” He cut himself off. Saehyun turned his attention back to Saeran. His teeth and fists were clenched tightly together as he turned his head away from Saehyun.

“Because every life matters. Regardless of my feelings and what they have done to me. To be a truly good person is to leave your emotions at the door. To put on a smile even in your darkest times and reach a helping hand out to those who need it.” Saehyun gave him a reassuring smile.

“Would you really go that far for someone?” Saeran’s voice held doubt as he turned to look back at him.

“Always.” Saeran scoffed. “Maybe one day, I can prove it to you.” This seemed to get him to pause as his eyes drifted over Saehyun’s form. They flashed with hope for what appeared to be a split second. But it was gone as quickly as it had come.

“Saehyun,” MC called. Saehyun turned to face her form. She was smiling down at him, some fresh clothes held neatly in her arms. “I bought some clothes for you. I tried to find something that matched your style. Or, well, that looked like the outfit you were wearing before.” She paused, hastily picking up a pair of glasses from the top of the folded pile. “I almost forgot, here!” They were thin, black-rimmed glasses. Almost identical to the ones he was wearing before the kidnapping. “Yours broke so I got you a new pair,” she said shyly as a blush stained her cheeks. Saehyun gave her a confused look at her strange behaviour but didn't question her about it.

Saeran began staring at him with a sort of odd fascination as he placed them on his face. Once they were on, the world became a lot less blurry.

“Thanks,” Saehyun said. His gaze roamed over MC, taking in her appearance now that he could see it better. She was definitely a beautiful woman. He could tell why his look-alike adored her so much. Though, he was still unsure of her personality and whether or not he liked it.

His gaze then shifted focus to Saeran. Mint green eyes stared back at him as he scanned his outfit. A brown sweater with a diamond-like pattern in the center. Brown pants and socks with a similar pattern to his sweater. Poking out underneath, he could just barely see a red tank top. The outfit suited him.

“What? Why are you staring at me?” Saeran asked, his voice irritated.

“I really like your sweater. Maybe I'll buy one too~” He teased.

“Oh shut up, what's wrong with it?” Saeran asked as he turned to look down at it. He pulled it out slightly to get a better view. Saehyun almost let out a soft laugh as a warmth filled his core to the brim. He didn't know why but this made him happy. It shouldn't. But it did.

“Nothing, I really like it~”

“Don't lie!”

“Why would I lie? Please, Saeran, teach me how to look as good as you~” Saeran picked up a decorative pillow as if ready to launch it at his face but he stopped himself. It was as if he remembered something as he frowned and put it back down. Saehyun also frowned, the atmosphere surrounding them suddenly becoming a lot grimmer. He honestly thought the mood had been improving. Maybe he was wrong. He watched as Saeran turned away from him, moving to get up off the couch.

Saeyoung stepped into the room right at that moment, his hair dishevelled and wet, most likely from just taking a shower. He was distracted for a few seconds with his belt before looking towards everyone with a bright smile. “What are we all up to?”

“Nothing,” Saeran replied, walking past his brother with a plate still piled high with food. He heard a clack as Saeran set it down on the kitchen counter before walking out of sight completely. A dark aura followed him as he left the room. Saehyun immediately felt a sort of guilt creep into his stomach in response while he nervously fiddled with his thumbs. Was it his fault Saeran was upset again? Maybe he should just stop talking to Saeran altogether. The thought made his mood drop even lower, his gaze shifting to the floor.

“Saeran, please come back and eat. You can’t just go all day without food.” MC quickly gave Saehyun the rest of his new clothes. “Here, I need to go talk to Saeran.” She then grabbed the plate he had left in the kitchen before chasing after him. Saehyun watched her, giving her a look of disbelief. Chasing after a grown man to eat his food like he was a child? Maybe that’s why Saeran was so moody. He shook his head slightly to rid himself of any other thoughts. It was none of his business anyways and he didn’t really care.

“So how are you feeling today?” He jumped. He had almost forgotten Saeyoung was still there, though he spoke again before he could answer. “You know, I made the pancakes this morning,” he said that as if it were some sort of accomplishment. “Did you like them?”

“I didn’t have any but they looked fine. So sure.” Saeyoung began to pout like a child upon his lackluster response.

“What? Didn’t you have any? But I worked so hard on them,” he whined.

“Okay, maybe I’ll have some next time.”

“Really?”

“No.” Though he accidentally let out a laugh when Saeyoung began frowning, completely ridding his retort of any seriousness. He immediately went to cover his mouth as if he had uttered a sin to god himself. The moment it hit Saeyoung’s ears, he immediately began smiling like an idiot again. God damn it, why did Saeyoung have such over the top reactions to things? There was a silence between them for a few seconds as Saeyoung tried to find something else to talk about. His eyes seemed to light up upon realizing something.

“You have your new glasses on! Are they okay? I figured you had the same prescription as me since we’re…” he paused, clearing his throat. Yeah, probably too soon to continue that sentence. “I wanted to pick out a different pair but MC insisted we get those ones.”

“I’m honestly glad she did. What the hell is that hooded sweater you’re wearing?” He now took the time to scan Saeyoung’s outfit. Everything else he was wearing seemed relatively normal apart from the lack of colour coordination. But his hoodie was by far the worst. It was a dark black covered in bright yellow circles. He would most likely personally pay a store to throw that in the trash.

“Hey, there is nothing wrong with it. It’s fashion!” He exclaimed, making a stupid pose as he tried to show it off. “A neutralizing black coupled with a cheerful yellow. The essence of perfection! Like honey buddha chips and Ph.D. Pepper soup!” Saehyun immediately gave him a look of disgust upon the conclusion of his explanation. What?

“I’m not even going to ask what that last thing you said was but whatever it is, don’t.”

“Aw, but it’s so good, seriously. You got to try it.”

“Saeyoung,” he tried to make his voice sound dead serious.

“Yeah?”

“When’s the last time you’ve been to a dentist? If you don’t say sometime within the past year, I will hit you.” Saeyoung’s expression became akin to a dog who just got caught chewing on the couch. “Do you know how bad chips and soda are, not only to your teeth but your body as well?” he scolded.

“I-I don’t eat them that often,” he sputtered.

“That’s a lie. You smell like junk food.”

“I do not, I just showered!”

“You don’t wash your clothes.”

“Yes, I do!” There was a pause. “Except my underwear,” he joked. Saehyun couldn’t help the laugh that made its way past his lips or the one that followed it. Until he was laughing like a madman. He slapped a hand over his mouth but all it succeeded in doing was muffling it.

“That’s-That’s disgusting,” he said between snorts and intakes of breath.

“That’s one of his many charms,” said an extremely sarcastic, but familiar voice. Saeyoung spun around to meet them. For a second he looked like he was ready to attack which sent a chill up Saehyun’s spine. He had almost forgotten he had been talking to his kidnapper, but in that small moment it came back and fear gripped him once more. Even though Saeyoung was quick to cover his misstep up. It did nothing to quell the new flurry of emotions building within him.

“Gah! Vanderwood, don’t just sneak up on me like that,” Saeyoung drawled. This only seemed to further irritate the other man as his eye twitched.

“I thought you said you would be out of the house by now,” his voice was laced with irritation. “You said you had an important last minute appointment.”

“You really didn’t want to see me that much?” A dopey smile spread on his face before his expression suddenly changed like he had some kind of realization. “Oh, shoot! The appointment. Saeran, we’re late, we gotta go!” He suddenly stormed out of the room, grabbing his wallet on his way. Saehyun heard a bit of thumping and talking before the twins and MC rushed back into sight.

Saeran looked like whatever mood he was in before had dissipated. He most likely had talked, whatever his problem was, out with MC; and also seemed like he took some time to freshen up. That calmed him down somewhat as he watched the twins leave through the front door. Saeyoung made sure he said a goodbye as he left while all Saeran did was glower at him. He made sure he memorized exactly how they opened and closed it.

“Thanks so much for coming by to check on his wounds again. I really appreciate it,” MC said, giving Vanderwood a quick hug. She sounded like a mom thanking a family friend for having the time to babysit her child. No, maybe even her dog. He clenched his fists tightly together as these thoughts swirled around in his head.

“It’s not a problem. I was free today anyways,” Vanderwood replied, giving her a half-hearted smile.

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, yeah. It’s no big deal.”

“Okay, I’m glad.” She turned to leave along with the other two but turned back again as if she had forgotten something. “I almost forgot. Would you like to stay for dinner? I’m making your favourite tonight. It’s the least I can do for all your help.”

“That sounds better than the takeout I had planned originally. So why not?” Though he sounded a bit unsure of himself.

“Alright, great. I’ll see you later!” She leaned forward and gave him a quick peck on the cheek before running out the door. For some reason that final action towards Vanderwood pissed him the fuck off, completely erasing any other emotion. He knew he was being irrational and it was just a friendly peck on the cheek. But it deeply irked him. He didn’t know why it’s not like they were close or that he should care. His mind was probably just frazzled. It’s been like that ever since he arrived here. He honestly wished he could just shut it up.

The door finally closed for the last time as the room was engulfed in silence. The only noise being a distant tick of a clock and the drip of a leaky faucet. Vanderwood turned to him and their eyes met.

“Still not happy here, huh? Though I’d be concerned if you were.” Saehyun hadn’t even realized he’d been scowling until now. He immediately forced his expression to become more neutral.

“Sorry, just tired. Feels like my body’s awake but my mind is half asleep,” he explained.

Vanderwood nodded as if completely understanding what he meant. “Man, do I ever know what that feels like.” Vanderwood walked towards him, throwing the first aid kit onto the coffee table before taking a seat. “Take off your shirt, let me check them.” A blush instantly stained his cheeks as he crossed his arms over his chest like he had a pair of breasts he didn’t want to expose.

“I’m not taking it off here,” he hissed.

“Why not?” His voice was filled with disbelief.

“What if they come back in because they forgot their keys or something? I’m not comfortable.”

“Last I checked you’re not a woman. Who cares if they see your chest. What do you do at the beach? Wear a bikini?” Vanderwood was giving him an incredulous look. But he opted to stare at a wall, not giving into anything being told to him. Vanderwood let out a long drawn out sigh when he didn’t budge. “Fine, let’s go to the bedroom.” His blush grew even darker upon hearing Vanderwood’s suggestion. “What’s your problem now?”

“N-nothing! Forget it, let's go.” Vanderwood gave him a look but didn’t press the issue any further. They both then got up and headed towards the guest bedroom, almost forgetting the first aid kit along the way.

Bounce. The bed springs creaked as he slowly removed his shirt from his body. He folded it up before placing it next to him. He felt shy, something he normally didn’t feel as butterflies fluttered about in his stomach; yelping when Vanderwood suddenly placed his hands on his chest without warning. “Did I hurt you?” he asked, halting his movements.

“No, you just startled me. Sorry.” Vanderwood hummed in response. He then began removing and changing his bandages.

“Are you in any pain? I brought some strong pain medication. I figured you could use it.” Saehyun blinked, he had thought about him before he got here? He had assumed the other man was doing this reluctantly and didn’t much care for his well-being. Or maybe he was just a practical person who thought ahead. What was he thinking? No one here cared about him. These thoughts made the butterflies disappear. Only to be replaced by a heavy rock. He needed to remind himself he was only still here so they could cover their tracks. Nothing more.

“A little. It mostly went away this morning when I woke up. But I could use them just in case.” His voice sounded grim.

“What’s wrong now?”

“What isn’t?” Vanderwood let out a sigh. An emotion flashing in his eyes that looked like sympathy before it disappeared as quickly as it came.

“Listen, they’re not bad people. We’re not bad people. This was all a misunderstanding and definitely stupid on Saeyoung’s part. But It’s not like we do this every day.”

“The way Saeyoung handled it tells me otherwise. It also tells me you’re lying. He was ready to kill me if he had to. My life at that moment meant nothing. What did the other two do besides stand and watch? Yeah sure, MC was reluctant but that’s as far as her caring went.” He shook his head, he didn’t feel like arguing. “So they’re definitely not good people either.”

“Nobody is.”

“I consider myself a good person. I try my damnedest every day to prove to myself I am. I will not be told that by somebody who is so low on that spectrum that they might as well be in jail.”

“Listen here. I’ve seen bad and I know what it looks like. You’ve only ever lived in your own little, naive and sheltered world. One many would be envious of. So what you think or consider right now, doesn’t matter.” Saehyun flinched when Vanderwood suddenly turned and slammed his first aid kit shut. He felt like a child being scolded for throwing a tantrum, but he should have every right to feel the way he does right now. HE has no right to tell him what he should and shouldn’t be thinking. This man’s past has nothing to do with his present actions. He is still held accountable no matter how much of a sob story it was.

“I don’t know what any of you want from me.” He could feel his frustration building. “Why I’m still here. Why I can’t just go home.”

“I don’t know, okay? I’m not exactly the one who brought you here.”

“Then why can’t you let me go!”

“Because I won’t let you ruin their lives!”

“They ruined it the moment they brought me here!”

“Would you shut up!” Vanderwood yelled, slamming his fist down on end table next to the bed. Both of them were panting as silence filled the void between them. They stayed like that for a while, both trying to calm down and reel back their minds which had gone astray. Saehyun eventually broke the silence as sobs wracked his body. Tears practically poured from his eyes, dripping down onto his chest. “I-I never meant to come here to make you feel worse or to be a dick. I’m sorry.” When the sobbing continued Vanderwood stepped towards Saehyun. He got down on his knees so that they were now at eye level and he stared at him for a moment, hesitating as he planned his next move. “Saehyun…” there was still no response, so he wrapped his arms around Saehyun. It was an awkward hug, but a hug nonetheless. “I’m sorry, please stop crying. I know this is stressful for you. I just wanted to help. I thought I was being a good person. For both you and my friends. You have to understand my position. But I-” he paused, gulping audibly. “N-nevermind.”

Saehyun didn’t badger him for what he meant to say next. Instead, he opted to bury his face into the other’s shirt while gripping it weakly. He then went stone still as he let the tears fall. All the pain, anger, frustration and confusion he had felt these past couple days all came out onto Vanderwood’s clothing. Despite how awkward the situation must have been for the already awkward man, he didn’t move an inch. In fact, they stayed like that for what felt like an eternity, until his tear ducts dried out and his throat couldn’t produce any more noise. By the end of it, he felt like a weight had been lifted from his chest. Or maybe he was just lightheaded. He couldn’t tell. But what he could tell was that he was grateful that Vanderwood had even bothered to comfort him at all. Maybe all hope wasn’t lost.


	4. Birds of a Feather Flock Together

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone, I finally finished chapter 4 at long last. Hopefully, you guys are still enjoying this story because for some reason I'm losing confidence in it. Anyways, please feel free to leave a comment or a kudos (I would really appreciate it, it keeps me motivated and the chapters coming~) or any critique you might have (don't be rude, I'm trying to improve). I also would like to give a big thanks to Karin for helping me stay on task and get this out there. Without her, I probably wouldn't have posted this. Thanks so much! Without further ado, I hope you enjoy!
> 
> Warning!: Contains major spoilers and possible triggering themes, read at your own risk.

“How are you feeling now?” Vanderwood asked as he put away the items he had taken out of his first aid kit.

“Like I just cried my eyes out,” he laughed. His voice came out hoarse as he licked his chapped lips. Vanderwood turned to him the moment he finished saying that. “But I feel better. For now.”

“That's good,” he sounded relieved. There was a long drawn out pause before Vanderwood spoke up again. “I noticed you had messed around with your stitches,” he accused.

Saehyun blushed, he would have almost forgotten about that if Vanderwood didn't bring it up. He had awoken early in the morning, covered in blood because his stitching opened. He was too scared to go get Saeyoung who had been the only one awake, so he tried to close it with whatever he had around. Probably not the best idea but he wasn't exactly in his right mind. “Yeah, it opened up this morning. So I tried to close it,” he explained, averting his eyes away from Vanderwood.

“Are you an idiot?! With what?!” He suddenly yelled, pulling Saehyun over to him as he reexamined his stitching. “This could get infected, I probably need to redo it!” Saehyun stared at Vanderwood as he fussed over him.

He hissed in pain as Vanderwood worked on his stitching while he was awake and without intravenous anesthesia to numb it. Every time it looked like he was going to whine about it, Vanderwood was quick to scold him for doing it in the first place. He eventually shut his mouth until it was done. Biting on his bottom lip when it got too unbearably painful. He always figured he had a decent pain threshold, but after this whole experience, he was starting to doubt that.

“There,” he said after what felt like an eternity. He wrapped it up in bandages after triple checking his work. “Should I put one of those cones dogs wear after surgery on your head so you don't bite or chew on it?” He joked.

“I think Saeyoung could use it more than me.” He replied which caused Vanderwood to chuckle softly.

“I'd rather put a gag on him so he shuts up for once in his life,” Vanderwood grumbled, finally completely putting away his first aid kit now that there were no more distractions.

“I didn't know you were into that sort of thing.” Saehyun let out a laugh when Vanderwood proceeded to glare daggers at him in mock anger.

“You're going to regret saying that,” Vanderwood warned as he jabbed Saehyun playfully in his side. Saehyun let out a mix between a laugh and a wheeze as he tried to instinctively move away from the other’s hand.

“Ow, that hurt!” He lied, rolling over to the other side of the bed.

“Oh please, I barely touched you.” Vanderwood slowly made his way around the bed like a predator about to pounce on its prey. He immediately chucked a pillow at him before he got any closer. Smiling triumphantly when it hit the other man's head.

“Ha! Take that!” He was immediately slammed in the face with the same pillow a second after saying that.

“You can have it back.” He removed the pillow off of himself right as he got another jab in his side. He pushed the pillow up into Vanderwood's face as a shield from any more oncoming attacks. Laughing like a maniac. “Stop that, you're being a child,” Vanderwood’s voice was muffled as he pushed the pillow away from him.

“You started it, don't even give me that. Here I thought you were the mature one. Guess you're exactly like Saeyoung,” He taunted. Rolling over again as he was almost jabbed once more for his antics.

“Alright,” Vanderwood started, crossing his arms. “Let's stop goofing around. You should go shower and put your new clothes on. You smell.”

“That's rude,” Saehyun replied as he adjusted his glasses before picking up the new clothes MC had gotten him. He blinked when he noticed the closet in ‘his’ room was slightly ajar when he remembered it always being closed. He flung the wooden doors open to see a bunch of new clothing that wasn't there the last time he snooped around. Stuck to the inside of the closet door was a note that said, “I got you some new clothes - love MC” it had a poorly drawn heart after her name. His bag was also there. “My bag!” He exclaimed, moving to quickly open it. His phone was in there, as well as his wallet, ID, everything. They most likely touched his stuff but nothing was gone. Wait, his phone wasn't working.

He began to panic as he tried pulling up the emergency call tab but nothing was opening. What the hell did they do? Unlocking his phone he realized he couldn't make any calls or text anybody. The last messages he got were from his sister and mother who were asking where he was. He read them, feeling his throat go dry when they progressively got more frantic and fearful.

“Please, please tell me you're still alive. I can't lose you.” He could feel tears well up in his eyes for the second time that day. Just when he had thought they packed up their bags and left too. He didn't even want to know the fear she was feeling right now. He hoped they were doing okay.

“Hey, what's wrong?” Vanderwood walked over when he noticed Saehyun had gone dead silent for too long.

“Nothing.” He tossed his useless phone onto the bed before trudging out of the room. His heart felt heavy in his chest as he tried not to cry again. He needed a cold shower.

 

Saehyun cringed as he stood in front of a mirror. His hair was messy and all over the place. He normally would use some hair gel to keep it neat but he couldn’t find any. He almost felt the urge to pluck some of the red strands standing up like antenna. “Ugh, I hate my stupid hair,” he mumbled to himself. Combing it back with his hands again for the fifteenth time in a row, only for it to slowly go back to the way it was before. He growled angrily, moving to adjust his new top instead.

Honestly, MC had figured out his taste in clothing pretty well. While he wouldn’t personally pick these items himself. He found they actually looked pretty good on him. At least something about him looked nice. He was wearing black jeans kept around his waist by a belt. Above that was a pinstripe button-down shirt under a brown denim jacket. On his feet were a pair of brown dress shoes and plain white socks.

“I really like your hair though,” MC suddenly said; appearing in the mirror like some sort of horror movie jump scare. He slapped a hand over his heart to calm its rapid beating before turning towards her.

“MC, do you know how to teleport?” His question obviously wasn't serious. Though MC put a finger on her chin as if thinking. Removing it from the basket of laundry she was holding and balancing it with the other. She then rested her chin against the palm of her free hand, smiling brightly.

“Maybe I do, but I've decided I don't want to reveal any secrets on how,” was her playful reply. She winked at him which caused him to smile slightly. “Oh, there it is~ I knew something was missing. But now that I've seen that handsome smile, I think I’ve finally found it.” H-handsome? A dark crimson stained his cheeks as he turned his head away from her. “Now you look even cuter,” She teased, letting out a laugh when he glared at her. He wasn't 'cute’.

Saeyoung turned the corner just as she started laughing. He began walking down the hallway, an opened package in his hand. His expression seemed grim like he had just heard the news that his dog died. MC turned to him the moment he neared the bathroom. Her eyes instantly lit up upon landing on his form. Saehyun gave him a confused look, what was his problem?

“Hey sweetie, I-” She cut herself off when she realized he wasn’t in a good mood. “Why the long face?”

“Not now, MC,” he replied; giving her a quick peck on the lips to reassure her he was okay but needed space, before walking off. Saehyun frowned when he didn’t even acknowledge him. In fact, he almost felt like he was the cause of the problem. A problem Saeyoung most likely wished didn’t exist. His heart dropped into his stomach as he glanced back towards the mirror.

MC’s eyes followed Saeyoung as he walked back out of sight. Her free hand was now at her mouth as her digits rested on her lips. She was clearly worried but didn’t press the issue any further. Instead, she let out a sigh, seeming to come to terms with something in her head. “He probably needs space and I have chores to do anyway,” she reassured herself more than him. “Anyways…” she trailed off, looking towards the direction she was about to head to. “I guess I’ll talk to you later.”

“Wait, let me help,” he said before she got the chance to move. He reached his arms out to take the heavy basket from her. She let out a small noise in relief when she didn’t have to carry it anymore. “I have nothing better to do anyway,” he explained. She smiled happily at him in response which caused him to smile back.

“Well, how about helping me cook, too? Four hands are better than two,” she offered.

“Um, I-I’m not the best at cooking,” he stammered. He could feel his body heat up in embarrassment as he swallowed thickly. “But I’m sure I could try. I can probably grasp the basics in a few minutes,” he reassured.

“You don’t know how to cook?” She asked, giving him a look of disbelief. “How have you been getting by on your own? What do you eat then?” She continued, placing her hands on her hips.

“Oh, I usually have a chef cook for me,” he replied. She began to practically choke on her own spit. She coughed and sputtered as she tried to catch her breath.

“Wait, what?!” She exclaimed incredulously. Saehyun raised his eyebrow at her reaction. Why was it so stunning? Yeah, it was more of a rich person thing to have but it shouldn’t elicit a response like that.

“It's not a big deal. My family is just wealthy,” he explained.

“F-family? I thought you were completely on your own.”

“I was when I was a kid. Well not alone, I was with the people who purchased me-” he cut himself off, frowning as memories he had pushed away came spiralling back. He rubbed his forehead as if he had a headache to clear his mind. No, he's lived a good life. Don't think of that, don't think of that! “Anyways, I was rehomed and adopted by my current family,” Saehyun explained. Gulping audibly, maybe he shouldn't have said the first part. He was beginning to regret it, even more, when MC began frowning at him.

“I can't believe your mother would- so that's how you got separated from-” Tears were pricking the corners of her eyes. He began to panic as one escaped only to roll down her cheek. Though before he got a chance to speak she opened her mouth again. “What did they do to you?” She asked, her voice cracking. Saehyun blinked in confusion. Why was she getting so worked up all of a sudden? “Saehyun, answer me!” She exclaimed, grabbing his arm. “Did they...did they hurt you?” Saehyun glanced to his side. He could feel nausea beginning to cloud his stomach. He didn't want to dig for those memories. Not now. Not when therapy finally got him the fuck over it. Though MC took his silence as a yes. She wrapped her arms around him tightly in a hug after putting the laundry on the floor.

“You don't have to hug me, it's fine.”

“Shut up, I want to,” She said; and so he wrapped his arms around her in turn. They stood there for a while as MC buried her face in his shirt. He hoped to god Saeyoung wouldn't walk back this way.

 

Saehyun took another plate from MC before washing off the juices from the raw meat that had been resting on it not long before. All the food was currently cooking and he was washing whatever MC didn’t need anymore. He stopped and stared, as the rushing water from the tap ran across the back of his hand. Biting his lip he could feel fear grip his nerves as Saeyoung entered the room. It’s not like he had kissed MC but everything they did up until this point felt too intimate for his comfort. It wasn’t until he saw his look-alike again that everything they did came back to his mind as something more than what there was supposed to be, between the two of them.

After he had stupidly let her hug him, she was practically stuck to him like glue. Coercing him to do more chores or just watch TV with her. It almost got to a point where he swore they were on a date and it made him uneasy when Saeran would come in and glare at him. As if he was stealing away his precious time with her. Now it felt like it was Saeyoung’s turn to give him that treatment.

Saeyoung stopped dead in his tracks for a split second. In that short time, it felt like he was boring holes into the back of his head. Saehyun let out a shaky breath, going stone still. Like if he didn’t move, he could blend into his surroundings and Saeyoung would go along his merry way. His body began shaking somewhat on its own accord before he almost let out a sigh of relief when Saeyoung continued to his destination.

“Saehyun, I got another dish for you~” MC singsonged. She handed him the dish only for a foreign hand to come in and take it from her. MC looked startled as she turned to her husband before smiling.

“It’s fine, I got it. You can go Saehyun, I can take it from here.” His voice tapered off into something menacing and Saehyun didn’t bother to argue. He didn’t care anyway. So pulling his hands out of the sink, he moved to wipe them on a dish towel to dry them.

“I’ll see you later, MC,” Saehyun said as he walked past her to head back to his room.

“Yeah, sure! We can continue the rest of that cheesy soap opera we were watching,” she laughed. Giving him a bright smile. He could see Saeyoung become tense behind her like their conversation was making him uncomfortable. Or maybe even angry. He hoped it was just the former. “Wait, did you see the new clothes I got you?” She asked excitedly as she completely ignored Saeyoung who was trying to talk to her.“I got you a gold top because I think you’ll look really good in gold.” She gripped his shirt, examining it closer as if imagining it was the other top she had apparently gotten him.

Though Saehyun paid no attention to anything she was saying as he tried to make excuse after excuse to leave. Saeyoung now looked extremely unhappy. If looks could kill, he would be disintegrated and removed from existence completely by this point.

Saehyun glanced to his side away from MC, “You know, I think your husband wants to talk to you,” he informed her. Letting out a small noise of relief when she turned to look at Saeyoung. “I don’t want to get hit again so I’m going to walk away. The last thing I need right now is to piss him off. So, yeah,” he said awkwardly, as he pulled away from her before walking out of sight. He wasn’t sure if he dodged a bullet or not, but he hoped just trying to be nice to her wouldn’t come to bite him in the ass later. What was he saying? The whole reason he’s even here is because he tried to be nice to her.

 

'Knock knock,’ Saehyun didn't even have a chance to reply before they stepped in. Moving his gaze up from the book in his hand, he gulped audibly when he realized it wasn't MC. Saeyoung stood there leaning against the closed door. His arms were crossed and he was giving him a look like he wanted to kill him. He began to shiver. Why did it feel like they were backtracking, rather than moving forward?

“So, how was your day?” He asked after what felt like an eternity of silence. He obviously didn't give a shit about how his day went. He came in here to taunt and torture him again. To slam his fist straight into his face. Saehyun dropped the book in his hand as Saeyoung studied him, his head tilting to the side as if trying to figure out a puzzle. “You and MC seem to be pretty chummy now.”

Saehyun swallowed hard, berating himself for even unintentionally goading his captor into the interrogation he was obviously about to be subjected to. “I-I guess,” he stammered, terrified of saying the wrong thing. “She asked me to help with some chores, and it’s not like I had anything else to do.”

Saeyoung pushed away from the door and Saehyun instinctively scrambled backward, though the wooden headboard prevented him from getting far. “Here’s something you can do,” Saeyoung said calmly, though Saehyun could see the anger building in the eyes that mirrored his own. “You can stay away from my wife.” He halted at the side of the bed, not touching Saehyun but still giving off an air of menace.

“Get away!” Saehyun screeched in panic, memories of the larger man’s fist hitting him repeatedly playing in a loop in his head. Panic overcame his senses and his body began to tremble with fear.

Saeyoung loomed over his look-alike, hands clenched into tight fists. Saehyun flinched when he formed them. Looking up at Saeyoung through watery eyes. “MC is kind and sometimes doesn’t know how to respect boundaries. Just because she’s nice to you doesn’t mean she wants you.” Saehyun didn't answer. He was being ridiculous. He never thought that.

“Glad you're so regretful of your actions and sincere in your apology to me,” he spat sarcastically as tears began streaming down his face. He felt all kinds of betrayed right now. “I wanted to trust you, I really di-” he was cut off when Saeyoung made a sudden movement with his hand. He began to hyperventilate. Instinctively going to attack the other man before he attacked him.

Saeyoung sidestepped out of the way of his poorly aimed fist before pinning him to the bed. He immediately began to thrash underneath him. Biting, kicking and scratching. “Get off me!” He screamed as his body tried everything within its power to flee.

“Stop! Calm down!” Saeyoung exclaimed as he tried to stop the smaller of the two of them from hurting him or himself.

MC burst into the room at that moment, her eyes landing on the scene before her. She let out a scream as she tried to pry Saeyoung away from him. “Saeyoung, stop!” he didn't. In fact, if anything, his grip grew tighter. “Saeyoung!” MC sounded distressed like she was the one being attacked.

Suddenly, Saeyoung's body convulsed as he let go of Saehyun and collapsed to the floor. “Fuck!” He screamed on his way down, letting go of him. Standing right behind him was Vanderwood who had an unreadable expression on his face. In his hand was a taser.

“What the fuck were you thinking?!” Vanderwood pinned Saeyoung to the ground just as he tried to get up again. “I highly doubt the person you beat the shit out of and kidnapped wants your fucking wife! Did it ever occur to you, maybe it's because you beat him up and kidnapped him that he hates your fucking guts?!”

“Shut up, Saehyun was freaking out. It's not what it looks like,” he explained, his expression changing to that of hurt. It was almost as if the realization that Saehyun might hate him, caused his mood to dip even lower.

Saehyun fled from the room the moment he regained his composure. Clambering down the hall, he ducked past a stunned Saeran before heading to the front door. He heard MC call after him but he didn't turn back. He didn't want to waste any time.

Opening the door by mimicking the way the others had exited. He immediately bolted straight outside. His breath coming out in short puffs as he tried to recall the route back. Fuck it, he didn't care right now. He needed to get away. So choosing a random direction, he began sprinting.

 

He had been walking for hours and was nowhere close to any kind of civilization. Yeah, he was going the right way. He knew he was but he imagined the distance wasn't this long on foot. Maybe Saeyoung's expensive car made the trip seem shorter than it was. His heart clenched at the thought of Saeyoung. The last memory he was going to have of him was how much he hated his guts. Maybe it was better this way. Maybe it was better Saeyoung didn't give him false hope.

He dropped onto his knees, balling his fists in the dirt. “Fuck you, Saeyoung! Why do you have to make me feel so fucking conflicted? I don't know if I should hate you or…” he paused. “Or..” he let out a sob. “Or whether I should really wish I had always been there...with you.” He slammed his face into the ground. “I shouldn't feel this way, I shouldn't care!” he yelled at no one in particular.

He sat there on the side of the road, his breathing ragged as he tried to calm down enough to keep walking. His legs were on fire now as he moved to get up again. Maybe Saeyoung had shown him the scenic route on purpose. He cursed himself having not thought of that before. Is that why he hasn't seen his car? Is that why he felt they hadn't even left to look for him yet? Because they knew he wouldn't go far? He shook his head to clear it from the questions swirling around within. If that was the case then he needed to hurry up. Not sit here contemplating what his look-alike had planned for him.

He began moving again, this time running. What if he wandered off the beaten path down some random stretch of road? Would he just get lost or lose them once and for all? He didn't have time to choose, however, when a black pick-up truck suddenly drove by him. The road had been empty up until this point and he practically jumped for joy as he ran in front of the vehicle to wave it down.

“Hey, help, please. I've been kidnapped! I need the police!” He exclaimed, smiling as the car stopped. Though that smile was quickly wiped off his face when a familiar man stepped out of it.

“Oh, look who it is. Honestly, from what I read on the news, I thought you were dead. But here you are,” The man said, gesturing to his person. “All alone, no less. What? Did you figure it would be more fun shitting in the bush than your posh penthouse?” He taunted, stepping forward. He was one of the prime minister's men, bodyguards, employees? He didn't remember. Ever since he met the man he had tried to harass him on multiple occasions. Though if it wasn't him, it was the running prime minister himself. It's like they both held some sort of grudge. Saehyun gulped loudly as he stepped back.

“You know, he never said I had to bring you alive.”

“What are you talking about? Bring me alive? Who sent you?”

“You don't know? Well no matter,” he replied, moving his hand to his pocket as if preparing himself to whip out a weapon. “He offered me a lot of money for your head.” His tone turned to something sinister as Saehyun realized what was about to happen. His eyes widened as he turned to run back down the road. “Uh, uh, uh~” the man pointed a gun at him. “Move an inch and I'll blow your head off.” Saehyun halted his every movement, going stone still as the prime minister's lacky walked up to him. He stood in front of him for a moment before letting out a harsh laugh at the fear prominent on Saehyun's features. “Not so confident anymore, huh, pretty boy?” He mocked. In the blink of an eye, he had grabbed Saehyun's head and slammed it into the hood of his car. His glasses flew off in the process, landing onto the road. The impact his face made caused the vehicle's alarm to go off. He swore he could feel his nose break as blood gushed across the other man's windshield. “Look what you fucking did you idiot!” he yelled, laughing as he picked up him up and slammed him right back down. When Saehyun tried to move, fight back, anything. The gun was pressed to the side of his head and he was given a final warning.

“Pl-please…” he pleaded as he was tossed to the ground like a ragdoll. His body scraped across the gravel-covered road, cutting his skin and causing him to whine pathetically.

“Shut up, another word and I'll shoot you regardless,” Saehyun screamed in agony when he stomped on his hand. Blood gushed out of his nose like a faucet. It spread across his face, almost making its way into his eyes. Though he paid that no mind as he instinctively moved to grab his now very swollen appendage. “I told you not to move, you little bitch!” He screamed, kicking his stomach. Saehyun let out a wheeze, closing his eyes tight and praying to the gods someone would come save him.

The shrill shriek of tires could be heard as the prime minister's lacky took his attention off of Saehyun to face the intruder. The moment he didn't feel any eyes on him, he curled up into a small ball. He tried his best to focus on his breathing as he heard two people step out of their car.

“Drop the gun,” was said by a familiar voice. For once he almost felt giddy to hear it.

“Saeyoung,” he called weakly as he tried to turn over to face him. Though he was kicked again for moving.

“What did I just fucking tell you!” The prime minister's lacky screamed as a warning shot was fired. Saehyun's breath hitched at the noise.

“Kick him again, touch him again and the next one won't just be a warning.” Saeyoung's voice came out calm but menacing. It almost sent chills down his spine at the icy atmosphere that surrounded him.

“Drop the gun,” Vanderwood suddenly spoke. Now realizing he was outmatched and outnumbered, he did just that. Saehyun's stomach felt like it dropped straight out his ass when the weapon landed right in front of his face. He became rigid as if doing anything besides breathing would cause it to explode.

Within what felt like a second, both Vanderwood and Saeyoung were on the guy, beating him into the ground. It was over as fast as it started. Vanderwood holding the man by his collar while Saeyoung crouched next to Saehyun.

“Fuck…” he cursed under his breath when he went to lift Saehyun's head up, only to get coated in blood. He elevated it to prevent any blood from going backwards. Sighing in relief when he realized no more was coming out. So it wasn't as serious as he first thought.

“If I ever see your face here again-!” Vanderwood was cut off as Saeyoung spoke over him.

“No, if I ever see his face here. I won't hesitate to personally kill him myself.” He let out a dry laugh. “Oh and if you ever lay a fucking finger on my brother again...” There was a pause. “I'm sure you can guess what will happen.” He smiled but it was anything but happy. In fact, it felt almost menacing.

His brother? Was he talking about Saeran? Did he also assault him? For some reason, the thought pissed him off despite his current predicament. “I-I, uh-” Saeyoung ruffled his hair, slightly as if telling him this wasn't the time to talk. He didn't argue. His voice was failing him anyway.

“Don't speak a word of this to anybody. I will know if you do and I will personally find you and blow your head off. Capiche?” Saeyoung added, the 'smile’ never leaving his face. Saehyun shivered at the dark aura surrounding him.

“Yes I won't, please, please let me go. I promise!” He begged pathetically.

Vanderwood threw him roughly against his vehicle after whispering something in his ear that had the man practically shaking in his boots. He immediately scrambled into his pickup truck before turning around and driving back the way he came.

The moment he was out of sight Vanderwood quickly made his way towards Saeyoung. “How is he?” He asked, kneeling down next to them.

“He's fine. It looks worse than it is, luckily.” He became confused at how truly relieved Saeyoung sounded. Twitching slightly when Saeyoung moved to wipe away some blood that was very close to seeping into his eyes.

Saehyun sputtered when a wet cloth was practically slapped into his face. He tried to move away from it, only to be scolded by Vanderwood. “If you don't stay still I'll tase you like I did to your brother,” he warned.

Brother? Wait, he was talking about him? Saeyoung was his brother? For some reason, he could feel happiness clench down around his heart. Saeyoung was his brother. He repeated that over and over again in his head as his lips slowly formed into a smile. He then suddenly turned and hugged him. Not caring that it was awkward because he was still lying on the ground. “I'm sorry-sorry-” he coughed violently which caused the two men surrounding him to flinch. “I'm sorry for making you upset and-and trying to punch you-I-”

“Stop talking, you're making it worse!” Vanderwood exclaimed as he pulled him away from his one-sided hug with Saeyoung to continue treating his wounds.

Saeyoung looked down at him, clearly surprised. He hadn't expected him to do that. Though he recovered from the initial shock quickly before smiling genuinely at him. Unlike the smile, he had given the prime minister's lacky before. “I forgive you, now hold still.”

“Okay,” Vanderwood said after a few more minutes of trying to patch him up. “He should be good for now but I'll finish working on him when we get back.” He then picked up Saehyun's discarded glasses before placing them back where they belonged. “Are you able to stand?”

“I think so,” Saehyun replied as he moved to get up. The world spun for a couple seconds as his vision went completely black. He stumbled but was immediately gripped by two sets of hands, keeping him upright. His surroundings came back into focus once more.

“You could've just said no,” Saeyoung chastised as he helped him to his car alongside Vanderwood.

“Sorry, I felt better when I laying on the ground,” he explained; getting in the back of the car as Vanderwood moved to sit next to him. Saeyoung took the wheel, starting the engine up again before doing a U-turn back the way they had come. “Ack!” He exclaimed as Vanderwood lightly smacked him in the back of the head.

“I was worried sick about you, dumbass,” he admitted.

“What? You never worry about me Vandy,” Saeyoung drawled the moment Vanderwood had finished speaking.

“Shut up, this isn't about you right now,” Vanderwood scolded as Saeyoung started laughing. He could tell when Saeyoung spoke like that, in a more playful manner that it irritated the older man. He probably did it so often for that reason.

Saehyun turned to look out the window. A frown ever present on his features. “I can't believe that someone would hire somebody to kill me. I never believed to be somebody who made many ene-” he cut himself off as he went into a coughing fit. Saeyoung eyes trailed up to the rear view mirror to give him a worried look as Vanderwood handed him a bottle of water. He gulped it down, continuing to cough for a bit longer.

“Stop talking, we'll figure out who's really after you when we get back,” Vanderwood reassured him, patting him gently on the back. Saehyun's hand was at his throat as he nodded. Wheezing slightly like his esophagus had begun to close.

“God Saehyun, your face.” Saehyun gave Vanderwood a confused look, wondering what was wrong with it. “It's so bruised and swollen now.” He pinched the bridge of his nose, sitting back. “I knew we should've left sooner.”

“There's no way we could've known that would happen,” Saeyoung reasoned more with himself than Vanderwood. “Saehyun, do you know anything about that man?” Saeyoung asked as he turned down a road Saehyun wasn't familiar with. He wanted to say he was going the wrong way when realization dawned on his face. He felt the urge to slam his hand into it. He fucking did take the scenic route. “Saehyun?”

“Yes, I've met him before but he’s tried to harass and assault me on multiple occasions. He works with the running prime minister, I don't remember his exact position though.” He paused to rest his chin on the palm of his hand. “Both of those assholes have had it out for me. I think they have some sort of grudge but I've always been surrounded by some kind of protection so they were never able to really do anything.” He ran his tongue along his bottom lip before biting down as he tried not to cough again. Saeyoung became dead silent in response. Almost worryingly so. His grip suddenly tightening on the wheel as he began to focus purely on the road. “S-Saeyoung?” He called. Causing him to snap out of whatever trance he was in.

“Yeah-yeah? Are you okay? Do you need anything?” Saehyun raised his eyebrow at him but didn't push the issue further.

“Yeah, a hug,” he joked.

“I can give you one when we get out,” he replied distractedly.

“I'm good, I was just kidding,” he blushed as he turned away. He honestly expected Saeyoung to make a snide comment, not just accept his request. What was wrong with him all of a sudden? He wasn't going to turn around and scold him about the MC thing again? Though when he didn't say anything else, he sighed in relief.

Vanderwood helped Saehyun inside. The moment they got back, he noticed both MC and Saeran. MC was standing at the door while Saeran was lounging on the couch like he didn't give a shit about what was going on.

Their eyes met and he noted the worry plastered on her face that only grew increasingly worse when she noticed his state. Her gaze immediately flew to her husband who was covered in his blood from earlier. He gulped audibly as her expression shifted to something grim, borderline furious. Oh no, was she blaming Saeyoung for his injuries right now? He asked himself as Saeran's head suddenly peeked up from the back of the couch.

He saw worry dancing around behind his cold stare. Something he didn't expect to see from him at all. His teeth clenched together as he stood up from the couch; just as Vanderwood took Saehyun down the hall to the guest bedroom and out of his sight.

He groaned in pain as he was placed onto the familiar mattress. Gasping when the cold air struck his body as Vanderwood removed his shirt. Vanderwood cursed as if affirming something he wished weren't true. Looking down at himself he realized his torso was covered in huge blue bruises. They stained the ones Saeyoung had given him only a few days ago which had begun to disappear.

“They're not too bad,” Saehyun said, moving to place his hand on one when Vanderwood gripped it like his life depended on it.

“Don't.” His voice shook slightly as Saehyun focused his gaze on his face. He was gritting his teeth together and clenching his free hand tightly into a fist.

“It's not a big deal-” he was about to awkwardly reassure.

“It is!” Vanderwood suddenly exclaimed, startling them both. They stared at each other for a second, neither talking before Vanderwood ran a hand across his face. “It is a lot more serious than you think,” he corrected himself, clearing his throat. Saehyun frowned slightly as he rested his hand back down on the bed. He jumped when he hadn't even noticed MC standing in the corner of the room.

“What are you doing? Get out!” He shrieked. A blush stained his cheeks as he covered himself with a nearby blanket. MC gave him a confused look. He still had his pants on so it's not like his entire body was exposed. But this was still an extremely uncomfortable situation for him nonetheless.

Vanderwood let out a sigh but Saehyun could easily make out the amused smirk on his face. What was so funny?! Get her out! “He's a little shy when it comes to his body,” Vanderwood explained; accidentally letting out a laugh which caused Saehyun to become ticked off. MC also started laughing, a warm smile making its way to her lips.

“You’re so cute~” she teased.

“No, I'm not!” He exclaimed, fumbling for his shirt.

“I just wanted to make sure you were okay,” she said, her smile slowly fading. She made her way over to the side of the bed, preventing from putting on his clothes. She then placed an ice pack over some of his swollen skin. “It's all so bad, you're so-you’re so injured…” She placed her digits on her lips.

He immediately ripped himself away from her as he quickly put his shirt back on. The ice pack was practically flung off of himself in the process and MC's frown grew deeper at his reaction. His body felt warm like it was on fire. He was so embarrassed right now. “Stop being such a drama queen,” Vanderwood said, laying him back down as he placed the ice pack back on his wounds.

“Saeyoung isn't the one who did this to you, right?” there was a dark part of him that wanted to say yes. Wanted MC to get mad at Saeyoung and push him away. But he shoved that feeling to the back of his mind as he held his tongue. The thought of Saeyoung being upset afterwards made his heart drop. He wouldn't get anything out of it anyway.

“No, it was some guy driving a black pickup truck,” he explained.

“That sounds like a lie!” She accused, stomping her foot down angrily. “He didn't tell you to lie to me, did he? Just like how he lied that he was just going to have a chat with you earlier…” tears welled in her eyes as she sniffled.

“What are you talking about? Saeyoung just wanted to play a quick game of hide and seek. He just tagged me really hard so I tripped down some stairs.” Vanderwood burst out laughing, as he tried to cover the noise with his hand. He moved to turn his head away as MC glared at him, her cheeks puffed up angrily.

“What are we laughing about?” Saeyoung was leaning against a wall, a smile on his face. Had he gotten over whatever was bugging him in the car? Saehyun's eyes scanned his form. No, he still looked tense.

“You…” Vanderwood took in a breath, before letting out another laugh. “You tripped him down some stairs…” he struggled to say. Saeyoung raised an eyebrow at Vanderwood’s response.

“It's not funny!” MC exclaimed her hands at her hips. “What really happened, I want to know!” She demanded.

“Okay, sorry. Vanderwood pushed me down some stairs.” Vanderwood started laughing harder despite the fact that the joke had probably gotten old by this point. Though the look on MC's face never did.

“You never laugh that hard at my jokes Vandy, so cruel,” Saeyoung whined. Vanderwood immediately stopped laughing. Almost eerily so, to give Saeyoung an unamused look.

“Because your jokes aren't funny. The only one who laughs at them is MC and that is only out of pity.” Saehyun let out a half snort in response to Vanderwood.

“Ouch, my poor heart. MC, fix it~” He then walked over to her to give her a kiss when she suddenly pulled away. His playful attitude shifted on a dime as his expression became worried. “MC?” He called, unsure.

“You did it, didn't you?”

“Did what?”

“Don't act stupid! You walked in covered in his blood looking like you were ready to kill someone. Don't turn to me and pretend everything is okay now!”

“MC, it's not what it looks like, please-”

“Saeyoung's right,” Saehyun suddenly piped up. A determined look on his face. Both of them turned to look at him. “I was almost kidnapped again by somebody who has had a grudge on me for a while. If anything, Saeyoung saved me even when he didn't have to. Even when letting that guy take me, would take me completely off your hands.” He paused, realizing something. “Why didn't you just let him take me? You wouldn't have had to deal with me anymore. It would have made the most sense.”

“I wouldn't just let him take my brother. Who do you take me for?” Saeyoung's voice shook.

“Brother? We barely even know each other. Saeran is your brother. I'm just a stranger who happens to look like you.” Saehyun let out a shaky breath when Saeyoung suddenly made his way over to him. He must've pissed him off. He must've gotten him upset that he didn't realize the obvious. Saehyun closed his eyes tight preparing for the blow when Saeyoung reached towards him. He let out a gasp when he suddenly felt the other’s fingers tangle in his hair. He waited for him to pull, yell, anything. Though when he didn't, he slowly opened his eyes up once more.

“Don't ever say that again.” He was stunned into silence as he noted the tears pricking the corners of Saeyoung's eyes. His heart clenched tightly in his chest. The hand on his head was suddenly shifted down to his back where he was swiftly pulled into a hug. He blinked, tears rolling down his cheeks that he didn't even realize had formed in the first place. He moved to wrap his arms around Saeyoung in turn.

 

Saehyun was startled awake when he felt a hand gently tap his shoulder. He blinked, as his eyes adjusted to the dark before focusing on a familiar face. “S-Saeran?” He called unsurely. There was no way Saeran was here, especially in the middle of the night. He must be seeing things.

“Come with me.” Did his illusion just talk?

“Huh? Huh?” He groaned, still disoriented.

“Shhh, come, hurry!” He whisper yelled as he tugged on Saehyun's sleeve to get him to move. Saehyun blinked in confusion but slowly got up to follow Saeran. His arm was gripped as he was dragged along through the hall and out the front door; after hastily putting on his pants, shoes and glasses. All the lights were off so he guessed that everyone else was still asleep. Where was he taking him?

Now standing outside, wind blowing through their hair, he was continuously pulled along. Down a winding dirt path, through trees and shrubs. He accidentally hit a few branches along the way, cursing under his breath until they arrived at a clearing.

“Saeran?” His voice sounded unsure when they stopped. His eyes wandering to the ground before him when he didn't receive a response. His breath was taken away as he took in his surroundings. He was in a field of what appeared to be flowers, shrouded by an ethereal glow from the full moon. Fireflies danced among their petals as pollen swirled through the air. “Wow…” he whispered. He was taken aback as he watched Saeran walk through the flowers to sit on a large boulder in the middle. When he didn't follow, Saeran gave him an impatient look which prompted his legs to start moving towards him.

He fumbled to get on the boulder next to his brother. With his injuries, it was either too painful or he wasn't able to get a good enough grip. Saeran suddenly turned and pulled him up when he realized he was struggling. He said a quick thanks as he sat at the top next to him. His eyes scanned his surroundings once more. The view was even more breathtaking here.

“Do you come here often?” Saehyun asked. He absentmindedly traced the cracks in the rock underneath him with his pointer finger. A smile lit up his face as his eyes darted about.

Saeran didn't answer as he fiddled with a plastic wrapper in his hand. Saehyun decided not to bug him, so he kept his mouth shut as Saeran opened up a popsicle. Placing the garbage next to him, he snapped the popsicle in half. So that’s why he wanted him to hurry. It would’ve melted everywhere if he took his time. Saehyun gave him a stunned look as one half was promptly shoved in his face.

“Um, for me?” He asked, but received no answer once more. Instead, the stick was carefully stuffed into his hand as he quickly grasped it, to not drop it onto the ground.

Saehyun stared at Saeran as he brought his own ice cream to his lips. He had so many questions swirling around in his head. Why did Saeran bring him here? If he just wanted someone to hang out with, why him? Why? Why? Why? Though instead of voicing any of them, he brought the raspberry flavoured treat to his lips before giving it a tentative lick. Chills rocketed down his spine as he could feel himself instantly calming.

They sat like that for a while. Simply enjoying the moment and the food in their hands before Saeran suddenly spoke up. Breaking the silence he had built. “You were hurt, and I-and I- did nothing. I felt bad about it and so I thought maybe…” He stared down at the popsicle in his hand. A bit of the melted treat rolled down the stick and onto his fingers. “I thought maybe this would make you feel better.” His voice was shy and timid as he turned his head away slightly. Despite it being dark out, Saehyun could just make out the blush on his face.

“Thanks, I really appreciate it,” was his short reply as he turned back to the blossoms that were swaying softly to a silent song just below their feet. Saeran pulled up his legs to rest his chin against his knees.

They stayed that way until their popsicles were long gone and the sun was slowly peeking over the horizon. They didn’t say much except for the small odd comment here and there. But Saehyun didn’t feel like they needed to. Just sitting there seemed to be enough for the both of them. Just sitting here, occasionally making Saeran smile with a stupid joke. His body spread with a welcome warmth and he couldn’t wipe the smile from his face. Even when it started to ache. Was it weird he almost didn’t want the night to end?


	5. Stories That Bind Us

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, it is here! Sorry if there are a bunch of errors no one really beta read this chapter and I kinda got excited and posted it anyway. I hope you enjoy this as much as I enjoyed writing it. As always please, please leave your thoughts in the comment section below, I love to hear what you guys think of my work. If you're not good with words than a kudos works too. Anyways, thanks so much for stopping by and I hope you enjoy!
> 
> Warning!: Contains major spoilers and possible triggering themes, read at your own risk.

Running, running through an endless darkened void. Saehyun’s eyes frantically searched for a door. For an escape. He felt like he was out of breath as he fled down this never-ending hell. Every time it felt like he was about to step into the light. Like he was finally at the end of the tunnel, it would be just beyond his reach. Why was he so short?

Looking around himself he realized he had hit a dead end. What was he escaping from again? He could tell he was in a room. Weird looking, misshapen blobs scattered about the place. Were they furniture? Everything in this room was black and covered in shadows. Just above him, he could see the light. A window. But no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t reach its high up ledge. He was desperate, clawing like a caged animal, but he couldn’t break free.

“There you are~” A voice pierced his ears as his heartbeat became rapid and erratic. Turning around he saw a shadowy monster. Huge, with piercing eyes and razor-sharp teeth. It towered over him. Making him feel like an ant in comparison to its stature. “We paid a lot of money for you. We wouldn’t want you leaving,” it added.

“No, no, go away.” Why was his voice so high pitched? Its huge hand reached towards him. It felt like it would crush him if it got any closer. He tried to run, but his legs felt like they had turned to stone. “No, don’t touch me!” He yelled but it ignored his pleas. He watched as its hands circled his small frame. It made him want to throw up. It’s very touch sickening him to the core. In desperation, he opened his mouth and screamed.

“Leave me alone!” He sat up, his breathing ragged. He looked about fearfully to his surroundings as if the creature in his nightmare would suddenly appear. When it didn’t, he let out the air in his lungs that he didn’t realize he was holding in. Another weird dream. He sighed, moving to get up. There was no point in trying to fall back asleep. He was wide awake now. He also felt like complete and utter shit.

Sitting on the edge of the bed, he groaned when he realized he was soaked in his own sweat. His bed sheets weren’t any better off. Great, now he needed to ask MC for some new ones. Or maybe he could just get them himself. He knew where she put them anyways since he had done the laundry with her the other day.

‘Smack!’ he jumped when the door was suddenly slammed open. The wall rattled as it made contact with its surface. Turning his head, his eyes widened when he saw Saeyoung and MC standing there, comically holding random household appliances as makeshift weapons. Saeyoung was wielding a vacuum while MC was holding a lamp. What the fuck?

“What are you doing?” His voice shook. He couldn't help it. Saeyoung looking like he was about to attack something, regardless of whether or not it was him; caused fear to grip his every nerve.

“Are you okay?” They said practically in unison. Saehyun gave them a look, what a weird couple.

“Uh, yeah, why wouldn't I be?” MC sighed in relief as they both put down their 'weapons’ at his response.

“What were you screaming about then?” Saeyoung asked, giving him a worried look as he stepped closer. Saehyun immediately backed away from the other man. It didn't even feel like a choice by this point. It felt almost akin to an immediate response. Like blinking or breathing. Saeyoung frowned at his actions, stopping in his tracks. They stared at each other for a few seconds before he seemed to realize something. He spread his fingers out so his palms were exposed while keeping them in plain view. He slowly began moving again towards his newfound brother. Saehyun let out a breath, as he could feel himself calming.

Saeyoung’s concerned expression seemed to intensify when he noticed something. Saehyun gave him a look of confusion in return. What was his problem? “Wha-” he was cut off when a hand was quickly placed against his forehead. He practically jumped out of his skin at the sudden fast movements his brother made. He instantly backed away. Almost falling off the edge of the bed when he was quickly steadied from behind by MC.

“Hold still,” Saeyoung scolded as he placed his hand back on his forehead. His breathing picked up significantly. Watching Saeyoung move some damp, loose red strands aside to place his whole palm against his skin without any obstructions. “You’re running a really high fever.” He cursed under his breath, MC quickly making her way out of the room as if reading her husband’s mind. Most likely to retrieve something.

“I am? I didn’t notice. I thought I just felt bad because of that nightmare,” he explained more to himself than Saeyoung.

“Nightmare?” Saeyoung frowned, thinking for a second. “He won’t get you, I promise. I won’t let him.” That wasn’t what his nightmare was about but he didn’t bother saying anything. Just the fact that he cared enough to say that, to reassure him, made him happy. “Or was it about me?” He could hear the hurt ebbing away at his normally more cheerful tone of voice. Though he was very meticulous in covering it.

Saehyun shook his head, “No, something that happened a long time ago. I can barely remember it. But it still haunts me.” He could barely form words now. Everything was beginning to feel too hard to do.

“Your past?” He could tell Saeyoung was now very intrigued but he didn’t continue. He didn’t feel like explaining it to him of all people. He didn’t need to know.

Shifting slightly, to get up, he watched as his vision swam. His feet landed on the carpet below and he dug his toes into it to steady himself. It wasn't unusual for him to get terrible fevers in times of stress. It happened often, so he shouldn't be surprised. But this fever felt worse than any previous one he's ever experienced. Though his circumstances right now weren't exactly normal.

For some reason, panic filled him as he realized his sister wouldn't be here to help. She was always by his side every time he fell ill. The fact that he'd be in a place where no one would care about him, while he's most vulnerable. Caused his hands to clam up and his throat to inadvertently close in on itself. He gasped for air, falling to his knees.

His name was called out of worry and he was quickly helped up off the ground. He gripped onto his saviour like a lifeline. Like if he didn't, he would fall into a pit of despair. He buried his face into their shirt or hoodie? Oh, he was clinging onto his brother. Panic ran rampant through his veins as his mind played the blame game. It's all Saeyoung's fault this was happening. It was all Saeyoung's fault he was on the brink of a mental breakdown.

He ripped himself away from the other man like he had been burned. Losing his footing in the process, causing himself to fall backwards and slam his head on the black end table next to the bed. It rattled as the lamp on top threatened to topple over. He draped his arm over it to prevent himself from hitting the ground. The small, flimsy table shook under the added weight while he went stone still as he caught his breath. He reigned in nerves to stop the involuntary shaking that wracked his body.

He could feel a lump blooming on the back of his head, but he didn't care. He was already so injured. May as well add another to the growing numbers. At least this one was self-inflicted. Why did he get some sort of misplaced relief at that knowledge? Maybe it was because everything these past few days had felt completely out of his control. He always had some sort of reign over his life. Something he could do to change his current predicament. But right now he was helpless and useless.

His brother began to tug on his arm, spouting out pointless comforting words to him. They went in one ear and out the other. He merely hugged the nightstand in response. Like maybe if he didn't move he could blend into his surroundings and Saeyoung could forget he existed. Of course, that didn't end up happening, as he could now tell his brother was becoming more frustrated by the second. Would he eventually snap and strike him?

MC stepped back into the room, saying something about how she set up the couch so she can fix his bed. Saeyoung replies with nonsense he didn't care to listen to. Probably complaining about his lack of responsiveness. He doesn't respond to MC either. He didn't want to give either the impression that he thought of her as something more precious or special than Saeyoung by responding to her.

“Please Saehyun, you need to get off the floor. I'm worried about you. You have to eat and rest or else you'll get worse.” MC's words finally reached him, but he turned his head away. Like a child that was being force fed a food, they didn't enjoy. Then a different voice reached out to him. It was soft and timid. Almost barely heard over Saeyoung whining about how he was going to carrying him if he didn't move.

Their heads snapped in the direction of the doorway where Saeran stood, fiddling with his sleeves nervously. “Saehyun…” last night flashed through his mind as he stared at his brother’s familiar mint eyes. He didn't know why but hearing his voice forced his legs to move on their own accord. He slowly got up and shambled over to the doorway. Both MC and Saeyoung giving him incredulous looks as he followed Saeran to the living room.

 

Saehyun didn't remember changing out of his sweat-drenched clothes. But he must've, judging by the feeling of the warm, dry sweater clinging to his skin. His eyes shifted to the other end of the couch where Saeran sat, staring blankly at the TV in front of them. He was wearing only a red tank top, which confused Saehyun. Where had his sweater gone? Wasn't he wearing one earlier? Maybe it had gotten too hot.

He blinked as he shifted under the blankets MC had set up for him. His jaw hurt from trying desperately to prevent his teeth from chattering but failing miserably. On top of that, he felt as if his body was about to combust into flames, his clogged nose only making matters worse. He sniffled loudly, Saeran's gaze flicking towards him in reaction to the noise.

His brother reached towards the coffee table where he grabbed a pitcher of cold water before pouring it into a nearby glass. He curled his fingers around it, handing it to Saehyun who wordlessly took it from his grip. With shaking hands, he carefully sat up and placed it to his lips. Sighing as the cool liquid slipped past and travelled down his throat. When he was done, Saeran immediately poured him another one.

“You-you don't need to do this for me,” he sputtered. Saeran gave him a look, staring at him for a few seconds before promptly getting up. He then walked out of sight causing Saehyun to frown. That's not what he meant. Great, he just got rid of his only company by opening his big mouth.

Realizing he was alone caused panic to course through his very being. As the only sounds that reached his ears were the dull droning of the TV and a running faucet that was most likely being used by MC. He didn't want to be alone. He was never alone when he became sick. This was scary, this was suffocating, this was…

He sighed when he noticed Saeyoung sitting at the dining table in plain view. He was reading a book about operating systems, absentmindedly running his fingers along the crease as he read.

He stared at him as if he was a mirage that would disappear the moment he pulled his eyes away. He couldn't handle being by himself right now. “What's wrong?” He hadn't even noticed he had been caught staring until his brother spoke.

“I'm-um-I’m scared…” he whispered, almost hoping the other didn't hear.

“Scared? Of what?” Saeyoung's voice was gentle and almost, comforting? Gosh, what was he thinking…

“I'm scared of-” he paused. What was he even scared of? Being alone? He probably sounded like such a child right now. “Can you sit next to me...please?” he practically begged.

Saeyoung gave him a stunned look but obliged nonetheless. He jammed his thumb between the pages of his book, most likely so he wouldn't lose his place before walking over to the couch. He plopped himself down on it, sitting closer to him than Saeran had been. Though he didn't feel uncomfortable at the sudden closeness. In fact, he welcomed it.

Saeyoung crossed his legs before opening his book up again. Saehyun continued to stare at him, but now through half-lidded eyes. There was a soothing silence that spread between them as neither spoke. He could feel sleep begin to tug gently at the corners of his mind.

“Do you know how to hack?” His brother suddenly piped up.

“N-No? Do you plan to teach me or something?”

“No. Never.” Then why bring it up? Saehyun tilted his head to the side like a confused dog. “I'm glad, in a way, that your life has been so normal.” How was he able to concentrate on reading and speaking at the same time? “Do you-do you like medical school?”

“What do you mean? What has your life been like?” Saeyoung immediately went silent as he raised his gaze from his book and over at Saehyun’s face, which was flushed a bright red.

“How’s your fever? MC gave you something for it, right?” He was avoiding the question. Though that only seemed fair since he had avoided the same question when Saeyoung had asked it. Clearly, neither of them were ready to get too personal quite yet.

“Um, I feel like I’m on fire. I can’t really sleep,” he mumbled, pulling the blankets draped over him up a bit more until they covered his chin. “Can you read out loud?” The hell kind of question was that? He would never say something like that in his right mind, but apparently, he wasn’t in it right now. He sounded like he was a prepubescent teen again with how the mucus in his throat clouded and distorted his voice. He wondered if Saeyoung would give him a disgusted look and leave, now that the words had left him. He opened his mouth to apologize when he was promptly cut off.

“You want me to read to you?” For some reason an emotion he couldn’t discern flashed behind Saeyoung’s eyes. Like he was remembering something from a long time ago. Something buried away, almost long forgotten but never truly lost.

“I’m-I’m sorry, I’m just sick and saying stupid things…”

“No, it’s fine. I’ll be right back,” He replied, placing the book down before getting up and stepping out of sight. Saehyun began to panic when he didn’t immediately return. His eyes glancing frantically around him like he was afraid something would jump out and grab him. He let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding in when Saeyoung came back into view, a children’s fairytale novel in hand. It looked old and worn like it had been used many times. Saehyun wondered if it held some sort of sentimental value as Saeyoung sat back down on the couch next to him. This time even closer than before.

Saeran decided to make his entrance right at that moment. In his hands was a vase filled to the brim with lavender. Saehyun sniffed the air, noting that the scent from the flowers had now wafted throughout the room. It was oddly calming and put his mind at ease.

“Saeran! You’re just in time, I was about to read Saehyun a story~” Saeyoung announced. He blinked when he noticed what his brother was carrying around. “What are you doing with those flowers?” He added, pointing to them. Saeran didn’t respond at first as he placed them on the coffee table. He adjusted it around for a good minute and a half. When he felt the position was just right, he finally spoke.

“Lavender can help you fall asleep. It relieves stress and pain.” Was his quick, to the point, explanation. Saehyun yawned in response.

“Hey, don’t fall asleep yet. I haven’t even started reading,” Saeyoung whined. It was almost as if he was looking forward to it. “Come on, Saeran, sit down with us,” He suggested, patting the cushion next to him cheerfully. He had the biggest smile on his face that Saehyun had ever seen.

Saeran hesitated for a second. His eyes glancing between the two of them as he frowned slightly. He seemed to be thinking intensely about whether or not he truly wanted to stay. Though he eventually gave in when Saeyoung encouraged him once more. Moving to sit next to him and causing Saeyoung to be sandwiched between his two brothers. Both Saeran and Saehyun focused on the browning pages of the book while Saeyoung adjusted himself so they both had a good view of it. He cleared his throat before licking his chapped lips.

“So, where did we leave off?” Saeyoung asked playfully which only caused Saeran to give him an unamused look.

“Like hell, I’d remember, that was years ago. Just start at the beginning, Saehyun wasn’t even there,” Saeran replied, his voice laced with irritation.

“I’m just kidding-I’m just kidding~” Saeyoung singsonged, turning his gaze to Saehyun who had accidentally closed his eyes. “Are you listening, Saehyun?” Saehyun jumped slightly at the utterance of his name before nodding sleepily. “Good~” Saehyun almost barely registered the hand affectionately ruffling his crimson locks.

“Stop stalling.”

“Alright, Alright, there once was a prince who had everything he ever wanted…” Saehyun barely heard the rest as he fell in and out of consciousness. This sweater was warm, the room smelled nice and his brother's voice was like a gentle lullaby ushering him to sleep. So he gave into it. The last thing he saw before passing out completely was MC joining them on the couch with a smile. The atmosphere was peaceful and filled with joy which seeped into his dreams, keeping them bright and free of nightmares.

 

“Mmmm…” Saehyun groaned as he shifted slightly. The first thing he noted was that the side of his face felt numb like his nerves had fallen asleep. He must’ve been resting against something hard for a while, he thought, cracking his eyes open. He opened and closed his mouth a few times, realizing it was drier than a desert. His tongue felt like sandpaper as he ran it along the roof of his mouth.

“Oh good, you’re awake. Lunch will be ready soon,” It was Saeyoung’s cheerful voice. But where was it coming from? Directly above him? That couldn’t be right. His gaze shifted upwards as he was met face to face with his brother, who had an arm draped casually over the back of the couch like he hadn’t fallen asleep on his lap. His eyes widened as he ripped himself away and moved to the other end of the sofa, panting slightly. “Hey, come back, now my lap is cold,” he teased, which caused Saehyun to sputter embarrassedly.

“I’m sorry-I didn’t mean to-you should’ve just moved me-or-or-or pushed me off-I-I-” he stuttered frantically.

“Yeah, you should be sorry. You drooled all over me and MC took pictures.”

“Huh-Wha?” He asked, disoriented. That was not the response he was expecting.

“I did not! Okay, maybe just a few~” MC said as she stepped into the room. She was carrying a tray covered in various plates and bowls of food. He could spot some sliced up fruit, cut into cute little shapes that looked tantalizing. He could also make out some soup and toast adjacent to a variety of spreads. Hopefully, that wasn’t all for him, there was no way he could finish that. “There you go, Saehyun.” She placed the tray in his lap, kicking up some stands on either side so it wasn’t resting directly on his legs.

“Th-thanks,” he whispered, flicking his eyes over everything.

“MC, where’s mine?” Saeyoung whined next to him as he got up and stretched before showering his wife in kisses. Saehyun ignored the happy couple as he spread some jam on his toast. Barely listening to the rest of their conversation as they stepped out of view. Were they not eating with him?

“W-Wait!” Though they were already gone. He frowned slightly, shoving some food into his mouth. Alone again.

He was halfway through his meal when he heard a loud crash. Like glass shattering. Had MC dropped a plate? He quickly turned his head towards the direction of the noise. His entire body becoming alert. “Saeran, calm down, please!”

“Don’t call me that!”

“Call you what? Your name?”

“It’s not my name!”

“Saeran, please…” Saeyoung’s voice sounded desperate. It made Saehyun’s heart feel like an unknown force was clenching down around it. The hell was going on?

“What did I just fucking say!” Another crash, more broken glass. “How long have you known and didn’t tell me?!”

“I just found out the other day. I didn’t think you were ready to hear it then.”

“Bullshit!”

“Saeran, I-” Saehyun quickly put his tray aside and was on his feet in seconds when the sound of skin hitting skin could be heard. He rushed over to the source of the noise without a second thought; his heart pumping rapidly and adrenaline coursing through his veins. When he arrived, the scene before him caused his breath to hitch. Saeyoung was pinning Saeran against the nearest wall. A large red welt on his right cheek like he had been struck with a great amount of force. MC was standing off to the side, covering her mouth like she was trying to prevent herself from screaming. Saeran’s eyes met his.

“You!” He began to struggle intensely now, seeming to have been calming down before Saehyun showed up. The look Saeran was giving him, he could swear caused his heart to shatter along with the glass his brother had thrown to the floor not long before. It was a look of utter hatred and resentment. What had he done wrong?

“Saehyun, get out!” Saeyoung screamed as Saeran began to trash around even more violently. Slamming his face into the wall as Saeyoung pushed back against him. Saehyun stared at them like a deer caught in headlights as Saeyoung was forcefully thrown onto a kitchen counter, Saeran overpowering him. Everything that was on it crashing to the floor as he let out a yelp, his back hitting a sharp corner. The sight alone causing Saehyun to cringe at the pain he wasn’t even experiencing.

Saehyun rushed over to his side to make sure he was okay. Kneeling down next to him as he gripped a spot on his back, opening his mouth in a silent scream. “Let me see, it could’ve caused serious damage to your spine and-!” Saehyun was cut off as he was gripped roughly by the collar of his shirt and dragged across the ground before being pinned down by his throat.

“No, don’t do it Saeran!” was MC’s shrill scream as she ran over to grab one of his arms and pull it away from Saehyun.

“Shut up!” He yelled, shoving her away from him. Though she was back on him the moment Saehyun started to cough and sputter at the hand closing in on his esophagus.

“He can’t breathe, Saeran, please!” Tears were streaming down her face as he could see Saeyoung struggling frantically to get up.

He gripped Saeran’s wrists, pushing as hard as he could. His hands going white, he was putting so much pressure on them. Though his attempts were in vain as this only fueled his brother's anger even more. He kicked his legs in fear, darkness beginning to ebb away at the corners of his vision. He could hear his heartbeat deafeningly against his eardrums as he flailed around. He was going to die here. This was the end.

Though all hope wasn’t lost as Saeran suddenly collapsed next to him, his body convulsing. “Why the fuck am I always walking in on this shit?” It was Vanderwood. “The hell is wrong with you idiots?” He added, Saeyoung finally getting up.

“Saeran got upset about something to do with Saehyun and-” Saeyoung tried to explain but was cut off.

“This is more than just getting upset!” He exclaimed, pointing to Saehyun who was laying on the ground gasping for air. His hands at his throat as he sucked it in. “He almost killed your brother! Well…your other brother. Look at him, he looks like shit!” Vanderwood added before grabbing Saehyun's arm. “That's it, I'm taking him with me.”

“Wait, what? You can't!”

“And why not? Every time I fix him up, I come back and he's worse than before. I can't take it!” Vanderwood sounded furious now which caused Saehyun to flinch.

“Because of the prime minister,” he explained.

“What about him?”

“You saw how close they had gotten to here. Who Saehyun was attacked by just the other day, that can’t be a coincidence! He’s looking for him and I need him in my sight so I know he’s safe. So I can protect him. Unlike me and Saeran, he is in plain view of the public’s eye so it would make sense they would target him, especially now,” he replied.

“Why would the prime minister be after you or your brothers?” Vanderwood asked incredulously.

“Because he’s-” He cut himself off, his eyes dropping to the floor. He had a look on his face like he was thinking about whether or not he wanted to finish his sentence.

“Fine, while you’re thinking up an excuse, I’ll be leaving. Come on, Saehyun.” Saehyun stumbled as he was pulled towards the front door.

“Because he’s our father!” This caused Vanderwood to stop in his tracks as Saehyun slammed into his back at the sudden change of pace. “He had illegitimate sons with another woman and you know what that would do to his reputation,” Saeyoung continued, following them. Vanderwood shifted his gaze to a wall as if he wanted to drill holes into it with his stare alone. Saehyun could practically hear the gears in his head turning.

MC and Saeran had all but disappeared. He hoped MC was alright and that they were just talking it out. Saeran seemed a lot more gentle with her, he wondered why. Though his focus shifted to his brother when he noticed he had a slight limp in his step. He was trying to conceal it but Saehyun was fortunately too observant for his own good.

“How’s your back? Let me check it, you’re injured,” he blurted out, worry laced in his voice. Though Vanderwood prevented him from stepping towards Saeyoung. “Let me go, I have to make sure he’s okay,” Saehyun ordered.

“If he’s okay? Have you looked in the mirror? You need to get your priorities straight,” Vanderwood scolded, scowling at him.

“I'm fine, Saehyun, don't worry about it,” Saeyoung reassured, giving him a soft smile. But that meant nothing to him. He needed to know for sure. He needed to see the wound with his own two eyes. He didn't know why he was being so persistent about it. But it was like this nagging feeling at the back of his mind, pushing him to worry. Pushing him to make sure he was okay.

Though before Saehyun could shed light on the issue, his body caved in on itself. His legs buckled and his arms went limp. He could feel the adrenaline leave his system, his fever taking its place. This time worse than before.

“Saehyun!” Saeyoung called in alarm as he suddenly tilted forward. He could hear footsteps quickly approaching him but he was caught instead by Vanderwood. Who growled irritatedly at the situation.

“I've got him, go check up on your wife and other brother. Hopefully, he hasn't killed her,” Vanderwood spat, shifting Saehyun so he was being carried bridal style. He then turned to walk away, only to be stopped by Saeyoung.

“Where are you taking him?”

“Where do you think? To his room to get him patched up for the fiftieth time in a row!” Vanderwood yelled, ripping himself away from his former colleague to continue making his way to Saehyun's room.

Saehyun let out a sigh upon feeling his back hit a familiar mattress. He was shivering uncontrollably as Vanderwood began to work tirelessly to get his fever down. He felt like he was in an oven, roasting alive. He was disoriented, his mind was practically on another planet completely. All he could do was gasp like a fish out of water while barely registering the tears streaming down his face. He must've passed out at some point because when he opened his eyes, his room was draped in darkness and Vanderwood was nowhere in sight.

Rolling onto his side, he reached for a glass that was resting atop the end table he had hit his head on that very morning. He cursed his luck when it was empty, smacking his lips together while his mind screamed at him to find something to drink.

“S-Saeyoung!” He called, trying to push himself up into a sitting position but failing miserably. He was a shaking mess.

He barely had a chance to even take in another breath, when the door was slammed open and the light was flicked on. He winced at the sudden increase in brightness. “What's wrong? What is it?” He didn't have time to think up a response before a hand was placed against his forehead. “His fever is going back up.” He suddenly felt a more feminine hand grip his arm to steady him as something was crammed in his ear. A thermometer.

“No, it’s okay, it’s going down,” MC said, her voice filled with relief.

“You guys would make good parents,” Saehyun randomly blurted out, causing them both to sputter embarrassedly in response.

“Please don’t start complimenting them on their baby making skills,” Vanderwood joked as he walked in.

“V-Vanderwood, you're still here,” Saehyun said way more excitedly than he meant to, pushing himself up into a sitting position.

“Of course I'm still here, how are you feeling?” Vanderwood asked as he pushed the happy couple aside to inspect him.

“Fine, I can't stop shivering though,” he explained, sputtering when Vanderwood pushed his head back to examine his neck. His nerves sparked to life as Vanderwood ran his digits across the surface of his skin under his chin. His golden eyes stared into the other's brown ones, noting that they looked focused as if he was searching for something.

“Oh good, he didn't bruise your neck,” Vanderwood let out a sigh of relief, pulling away from him.

“Bruise...wait! Saeyoung, how is your back?!” He flinched as he was lightly smacked over the head.

“What did I tell you about getting your priorities straight? Honestly, it's like I was talking to a brick wall,” Vanderwood scolded.

“Then him and my husband have a lot in common,” MC joked, causing Saeyoung to playfully nudge her with his elbow. She laughed before telling him to cut it out. Though he simply did it again in response to her protests. “He's fine, Vanderwood looked at it,” she added between giggles.

“Oh Vandy, I'm so happy you cared enough to see me naked!” Saeyoung exclaimed in a goofy voice before gripping onto Vanderwood's arm in his excitement.

“I did not see you naked, now get off of me!”

“Just admit it, you love me~”

“I bet my taser loves you, even more~” Vanderwood said, poorly mimicking Saeyoung's tone of voice.

“Gah, no!” He exclaimed, ripping himself away from the other man. “But you didn't deny it~”

“That's it!” Saehyun watched as Saeyoung quickly ran out of the room like a child. He stared at where his brother was standing just a few seconds before in disbelief. He was fast. “Go get Saehyun some food, you idiot!” Vanderwood called after him.

“Food sounds good,” Saehyun whispered weakly as he adjusted the pillows so he could comfortably rest his back on them. He jumped slightly when he felt a pair of soft lips against his cheek.

“Don't worry, we'll get you some food, sweetie.” Saehyun gave MC a confused look, a blush instantly staining his features.

“Sw-sweetie?” He croaked.

“When you were badly suffering from your fever earlier, you kept screaming about being scared and not wanting people to touch you because it hurt.” Saehyun blinked, he didn't remember doing that. “I was so worried, I cradled you and called you sweetie and you instantly calmed down. It was so cute. You went to sleep like a baby~”

“Wh-what?! That's so embarrassing…” Saehyun grit his teeth as he covered his face with his hand. MC laughed at his shyness, which only caused him to become even more embarrassed.

“Eh, it suits you,” Vanderwood piped up, casually leaning against a wall.

“Suits me? What is that supposed to mean?” Vanderwood went to open his mouth to reply when there was a loud crash. Everyone turned their attention to the doorway.

“Vandy, I need help~”

“Ugh, can that idiot do anything on his own?” Vanderwood grumbled giving both MC and Saehyun a look before stomping out. It was almost as if he was communicating he would be right back.

There was a silence that spread throughout the room as neither MC nor he spoke. He felt the mattress bounce as MC took a seat on the end of it. They stared at each other for a few seconds, neither knowing what to say until MC seemed to remember something.

“You mentioned someone named Eun in your sleep, who is that?” Saehyun's heart jumped upon the mention of that name. He almost felt the urge to look around the room like she would be there, smiling at him, but he knew that wouldn't happen. That giddy feeling from before was replaced with emptiness as he frowned.

“My older sister,” was his short reply.

“Your older sister?” MC seemed taken aback but she recovered from whatever amount of shock she received from such a mundane answer, quickly. He nodded. “Are you two close?”

He stared down at the comforter, debating whether or not he wanted to tell her. “Yes,” he finally replied after what felt like an eternity.

“What did you two do together?” Saehyun's eyes drifted back up to MC who was looking at him with genuine curiosity. She was really interested in his life. He wasn't sure whether that made him uncomfortable or happy. Maybe both.

“When-when I was first adopted she was like a shining light in my life. Before that, everyone who touched me felt disgusting, felt painful. They would-they would chain me inside, call me pretty, I wouldn't eat for-” he paused, sniffling as he ran a hand across his eyes. “She was the first person who loved me. I was so happy to be held in her arms when I felt so small. I hated myself for so long but she-she made me like myself. Made me believe in myself. She would take care of me and we'd do everything together.” MC was giving him a sympathetic look as she moved forward and wiped a tear away from his face.

“I'm sorry you suffered alone-I-I wish I could've been there...to help.” Her frown deepened when he took in a shaky breath.

“I don't know why I told you that, I shouldn't have.”

“No-No, you can tell me anything,” MC reassured as she suddenly moved to sit next to him, wrapping an arm around his shoulders and pulling him flush against her. “I want to hear what you have to say.” Saehyun turned his head slightly to look at her. She was giving him a kind and sincere smile. It warmed his heart slightly as he swallowed thickly.

“I-sometimes I-I have nightmares of what they did to me,” He admitted. He let out a sigh when she squeezed his shoulder reassuringly.

“That's good to know, I'll be here whenever you have one, okay?” He nodded, going silent for a few seconds.

“Is it weird I kind of want Saeyoung to be there for me?” There was a loud cough from the doorway, followed by a series of smaller coughs. Like something had gone down the wrong way. No...he didn't hear all that, did he?

Saehyun's face turned as red as his hair when Saeyoung stepped into the room, holding a tray of food. If there was ever a time he wanted to drop dead in his life, now would be perfect. He immediately shoved himself away from MC, hiding his face in his hands. He almost wished that just because he couldn't see his surroundings that they would disappear.

“Saeyoung, were you eavesdropping?” MC asked in a stern voice.

“Me? Eavesdrop? Never,” Was his immediate response though MC wasn't having it. “Babe, I can't believe you'd accuse me of that.” Something about his tone of voice seemed off. Like he was forcing the cheerfulness that normally wound its way around his every word. But it seemed right now he was having trouble and it was obvious. At least to Saehyun. Was he mad that they were having this conversation? Would he have another talking to about staying away from MC? His heart plummeted. She was the only person he could express his feelings to right now, if she left…god, he missed Eun so fucking much.

“Don't play dumb, you know what you did!” MC scolded, glaring at him.

“My own wife, turning against me for another man, I'm deeply wounded,” He joked as he placed the tray he was holding on the nightstand next to the bed.

“Oh please, don't give me that. He's your brother,” MC said, rolling her eyes. The word brother triggered certain memories, the ones he made prior to passing out. Getting attacked by his so-called brother being one of them. Saeran...why had he gotten so upset with him? He didn't understand and he couldn't recall doing anything weird since last night. He honestly had believed their relationship to be improving.

“How is Saeran? Is he okay?” He whispered almost shyly. They both turned to him as Vanderwood walked in, irritation etched into his expression.

“He's fine, he just got a little-” MC cut herself as if trying to find the right words.

“I'm sorry I upset him.”

“No, it's not your fault, Saehyun. Saeran has been through a lot in his life and sometimes he lashes out. He doesn't mean to, but when he gets really stressed out he can't help it,” Saeyoung explained.

“He does this every time he gets stressed out?”

“No, well, he used to. He was getting better, but ever since you showed up he's been getting worse.” Saeyoung paused, realizing what that must sound like. “Not that it's your fault!”

“He attacked you and didn't get a single injury, yet you're asking if he's okay?” Vanderwood questioned him in utter disbelief.

“Yes.”

“Do I need to repeat myself a third time about getting your priorities straight? You should think of your safety and well-being before anyone else's.”

“No, that goes completely against everything I believe. I-”

“Don't be an idiot! When you're outside your sheltered little life like you are now, there is no room for your beliefs on helping others or putting them first. You're putting yourself in danger and that's all you're accomplishing.” Saehyun dropped his gaze away from Vanderwood, he didn’t feel like arguing with the other man. He was still here helping him when he most likely wasn’t getting paid anymore. Isn’t that a little hypocritical? Why did he care anyway?

Saeyoung cleared his throat, both of them turning their attention back to him. “Are you two done with your lover’s quarrel~?” He teased.

“Lover’s quarrel? Why you!”

“Gah no, Vandy, get away~” Saehyun almost fell off the bed as Saeyoung crawled across it to get behind MC, causing the whole thing to wildly bounce around.

“You’re such a child, get back here.”

“No! Save me, babe~”

“You deserve it,” MC replied, laughing when he suddenly started tickling her. “Stop that!” She exclaimed between laughs. They unceremoniously connected in a long and passionate kiss. The sounds of lips smacking and tongues clashing together sloppily, reverberating through the room.

Saehyun looked away awkwardly, why were they doing this on his bed? He felt the urge to throw up when he noticed his brother’s hand run a trail along MC’s form. “Vanderwood, can you tase them before they start having sex, please?” Saehyun pleaded.

“Would you morons get a room, there are children present,” Vanderwood said, gesturing to Saehyun who glared at him.

“We are in a room~” Saeyoung teased.

“Your own room.”

 

Saehyun shifted himself slightly against the backrest of the couch. He was back to watching boring soap operas. Nothing else seemed to really pique his interest when he had flicked through the channels earlier. He at least liked the romance aspect of some of these shows, so there was that.

He never really spent time watching TV. If he had the spare time he would read or write some long unnecessary paper on something he had found interesting. He supposed maybe he could ask MC for a romance novel. He really enjoyed that genre despite its cheesiness and unrealistic tropes; you could say he was a hopeless romantic.

The cushion next to him suddenly dipped as Saeran sat next to him. He looked nervous like he had something he wanted to say but wasn't able to work himself up to spitting it out.

Saehyun trained his eyes on the screen in front of him. He felt if he turned to glance at his brother it would scare him away. Though it took every fibre in his being not to look. He was so curious, he wanted to read the other's body language to see if there was any clue as to why he was here. Though he pushed the urge from his mind, letting the dull drone of the show fill the void between them. If he wanted to interact with him, he would.

Though as the seconds ticked by, he could begin to feel the tension hanging thick in the air. His palms became sweaty as he pressed them together nervously. Maybe he hadn't come to speak to him at all. Maybe he had gotten ahead of himself. Don't look. Don't look.

He frowned when Saeran got up, standing there for a few seconds looking lost. Like he didn't believe he was standing in his own home. Then he moved and grabbed the remote before switching the channel to a show about painting and art.

Saeran looked back at him as if he expected him to say something. To get angry that he changed the channel right when the leads were about to kiss. To lash out, anything. Though when all Saehyun did was continue watching, he seemed to grow irritated. Like he was expecting something and he wasn't currently receiving it.

Saeran plopped down next to him again, he noticed out of the corner of his eyes that he was clenching and unclenching his fists. Would he attack him again? The thought sent a jolt down his spine as he kept his focus away from the other man. He almost wanted to move away, but would that be too obvious? Would he take offence to that?

“Say something.” It was almost inaudible, barely above a whisper. It caused Saehyun to finally shift his gaze over to him.

“Are you feeling okay?”

“That's-that's all you have to say, after I-?” Saeran grit his teeth, anger lacing its way around his every word. “You're a stupid, airhead.” Saehyun blinked, a what?

“I'm sorry I made you upset earlier. I apologize for whatever it was I did.” Why did that only seem to anger him more? “Do you want to maybe, go get some ice cream again?”

“Why are you being so nice to me?” He hissed.

“Because I care about you.” Saehyun felt a stab at his heart when the other scoffed at him.

“Why? Why would you possibly care?”

“Do I need a reason to be a good person?” Saeran stared at him almost in disbelief. His mint green eyes searching his yellow ones. As if looking for evidence that he was being deceitful, that everything that left his lips was a ruse. But it was the truth, he wasn't lying. He had no reason to.

“Of course you do!” He was so sure of himself, of the words he spat in his direction.

“I don't, I-”

“Shut up! You're a liar!” He accused anyways. Saehyun could tell he was trying his damnedest to convince himself that the accusation was true and nothing but the truth.

“Fine, forget it, I'm a horrible person who only cares about himself...but…” he took in a breath, he didn't feel like arguing. Just bonding, just making things right. Just seeing that smile grace his lips again. The one that would warm his very soul. Not even he knew the reason as to why it did. “Can we get ice cream anyway? It made me so incredibly happy to be there with you last night.” He let his emotions show through and wind their way around his voice; trailing through his body, making themselves plainly obvious. He wanted to be sincere.

He could see a plethora of emotions flash across his brother's features. Some negative and some positive. He could tell that maybe he had gone too far with what he had said. Maybe he had come on too strong. He did.

Saeran got up and promptly left the room. He wasn't sure what the other felt, but he knew for certain that he felt empty. He had fucked up.


	6. Stronger Than You Know

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone, I finally got the chapter done and I'm so excited to see what you guys think. A lot happens this chapter, some good and some really bad. Be warned that there are some stronger triggering themes in this chapter than usual. Anyways please consider leaving a comment or kudos, it really means a lot to me. Without further ado, enjoy the chapter!
> 
> A big thanks to Robyn and Lokiiwood (undersans). Love you guys <3
> 
> Warning!: Contains major spoilers and possible triggering themes, read at your own risk.
> 
> Here's my Tumblr if you wish to contact me:  @aromaticboar 

A few days had come and gone quicker than he had imagined at first. Most of that time Saehyun had spent chatting with MC about the books she would lend him. MC referred to every book she gave him as 'the greatest book ever' so often, he lost track of how many times she used that phrase. Of course he enjoyed them, but 'greatest’ was pushing it. Besides that, he also looked forward to Vanderwood’s frequent visits which were becoming more unnecessary with each passing sunrise. He was practically a trained professional when it came to simple first aid; but for some reason he didn't mind the pampering and coddling he received from the older man. Saeyoung, on the other hand, made sure to tease him about it and the two would get into a playful banter. MC usually had to step in to break it up, thinking they were actually fighting. It was beginning to feel like he was part of this weird family or whatever it was. Well, all except for one aspect of it. Saeran now completely ignored him.

Now by himself, with a magazine he had swindled from MC; Saehyun licked the tip of his finger before pressing it down on the page in front of him. With a swift flick of the wrist, he had turned the colorful page over to the next. His eyes skimmed over its contents. Saehyun had a dirty secret. One he would never admit to anyone, except Eun. His eyes landed on a frilly, black, gothic, pouf dress. He liked to crossdress.

He remembered it all started when his sister noticed he enjoyed singing. He loved to sing, it was a secret hobby. When he wasn't reading, he was singing. Of course his parents wanted to protect him, they said he couldn't follow a career path that would throw his name out there or put him in the limelight. So Eun formulated a plan. He could sing but...under a false name and dressed like a woman, so not even his parents would recognize him. He knew they wouldn't approve. He was happy with that and no one could tell the difference. Not even the surprising fanbase he had acquired over the years. They seemed to like the fact that he was shrouded in mystery. He would occasionally visit threads and forums dedicated to discussing his past. It was all outlandish and ridiculous but fun nonetheless.

_“Eun, I’m scared, I can’t do it.” Saehyun’s eyes shifted up to his sister’s larger frame. She was smiling at him, kneeling down slightly to look him directly in the eyes. She brushed a loose brown strand of hair behind her head. Her hair was always so gorgeous. He wanted his hair to look that nice too, but it was so ugly and messy. So different from hers._

_“You can do it, I believe in you. You’re a talented and amazing little brother,” her words and voice were soothing, angelic. “I’ve known since the day I met you, that you could do anything you set your mind to. Now go…” She gently nudged him towards the stage. He could see his classmates waiting for him to make his entrance so they could continue the play, as he stumbled forward a few steps. He turned to look back at Eun, unsure of whether or not he wanted to do it. “I’ll be here, waiting for you.” With that said, he continued his trek with newfound determination and stepped into the spotlight. His heart beat erratically as his eyes landed on his parents, his mother was holding a camera. He smiled at her; yeah, he could do this._

Saehyun was snapped out of his daydream when he felt a hand on his shoulder. A voice forcing its way into his ears. “What are you looking at?” Saeyoung asked, his tone playful, almost teasing. He immediately moved to slam the magazine shut in response, but his brother swiped it away before he could. “These dresses are pretty, who are you looking at them for? A girlfriend? or maybe…” His finger uncannily landing on the exact dress Saehyun was eying not long before, “yourself!”

“Don’t-don’t be crazy, I’m a guy, why would I wear a dress?” He lied, blushing softly.

“Hmmmm~” Saeyoung hummed as he put a finger on his lips, pretending to think hard about it. “Maybe because my little brother enjoys crossdressing,” he had a huge shit eating grin on his face.

“Little brother? How do you know I'm not the oldest?” He said, trying desperately to change the subject.

“Because you're so small and cute, like me. Minus the small part,” He teased, ruffling Saehyun's hair. Saehyun immediately tried to push him away, jumping at the sudden contact. He frowned for a second at Saehyun's reaction but was quick to cover it up. “You'd be an adorable girl, I can see it now.” Saehyun stared at his brother as he went into a rant about what makeup would look good on his face. Where exactly he should put it, what colors he should use. He even went into brands.

Saehyun tried to keep an annoyed facade the entire time. But occasionally, when information he didn't know about would leak through, he became intrigued. Only to have it pointed out immediately by Saeyoung, causing him to glare at the other man. “Would you go away, I don't crossdress!” He exclaimed, he was completely and utterly embarrassed.

“You don't need to be embarrassed, Sae-hyun~” he only grew more annoyed when he singsonged his name. “I also crossdress, oh, it'll be so much fun to do together, just me and you!” Saehyun immediately shoved himself away from Saeyoung, as he tried to reach out for him again in his excitement. The chair he was sitting on tipped backwards and he jumped to his feet before he could fall to the ground. Saeyoung’s furniture wasn’t as lucky, however, as it clattered across the dining room floor.

“No, we're not doing anything together. I don't crossdress for one and I don't want to do anything with you!” He honestly only snapped like that because he was embarrassed and flustered. Saeyoung wasn’t helping by pushing him into a corner with his words. He just wanted his brother to drop the subject already. Though when he began looking like a kicked puppy, he immediately felt the urge to take his words back. “I'm sorry, I didn't mean that. I just-can we drop it?”

Saeyoung perked up somewhat at his apology. He nodded as he went to place the chair he had tipped over back upright. “I want to take you for a drive today.” Saehyun gave him a confused look, a drive? “You’ve been cooped up these past couple days and I think it would be good for you to get some fresh air. I don’t want my baby brother going stir crazy~”

“Uh, okay,” he replied, dumbfoundedly.

“You can pick which of my babies we use. Come on, let's go,” he said, throwing the magazine onto the nearest table. It slid across the smooth surface before hitting the floor. Saeyoung ignored it as he continued his trek to the front door.

“Wait, now?” Saehyun asked, following him.

“Yeah, that’s why I came to talk to you in the first place. Didn’t you hear me?”

“Uh no, I was daydreaming,” Saehyun replied, watching as Saeyoung pressed a few keys on his door to get it open. It was different from last time, figures.

They made their way to his garage as his brother whistled to some annoying tune. Glancing behind him down the road, he realized he could run. No, Saeyoung could easily outrun him and there was the added danger of someone finding him who wasn’t exactly friendly. At least for now, Saeyoung wasn’t a threat. Turning his eyes back to him, he ran them over his body looking for his pressure points and exposed areas. Maybe if he could somehow knock the other man out, he could steal his car and get back home. That probably wasn’t an option either; Saeyoung might have a weapon on him, and he doubted his capabilities to work fast enough to subdue him before he retaliated.

“What are you thinking about?” Saeyoung asked as they reached their destination. He was giving him a dangerous look, one filled with a warning. It sent a shiver down his spine as he instinctively looked away. He was starting to regret following him, he wanted to go back now.

Wait, maybe if he got him to lower his guard. Maybe if he got him close enough that he couldn't do anything fast enough, maybe, just maybe that could work. But how? He chanced another look at his brother who was unlocking one of his expensive cars. Then he glanced back down the road through the still open garage door. Perhaps there could be something in this garage he could use as a weapon. People normally kept things like saws or machetes out here, right?

He surveyed his surroundings, his eyes running over every nook and cranny for something that might be of use to him. This place was practically barren except for some gas canisters. Maybe he could dump them on Saeyoung and threaten to light him on fire if he didn't let him take his car. He wouldn't dare light someone on fire though, the idea in and of itself made him nauseated. Only a truly sick person would do such a thing. Even if he did it purely for the threat, what if Saeyoung touched something trying to get it off and lit himself up anyways? His breath hitched as the image forced its way to the forefront of his mind, while he tried to swallow the lump forming in his throat. No, he couldn't do it. He wanted to get away, not brutally injure him. He almost felt the urge to apologize for his own train of thought, even though Saeyoung couldn't hear them.

“You should get in before I change my mind~” His brother's voice was a mix between playful and menacing. It caused his legs to move on their own accord so that he now sat in the passenger seat. He turned his head to look out the window while Saeyoung pulled out of the garage and onto the road. “I made sandwiches and brought snacks and drinks,” he announced happily to the back of Saehyun's head.

“Oh, I could go for a drink right now. What kinds do you have? I really need a beer.” If he got drunk off his ass then maybe he could forget he existed; or the fact that he was currently on a joy ride with the man who kidnapped him, blood relative or not.

“Oh no, I don't drink, I brought some PhD Pepper though,” he said, nudging him gently with his elbow. He flinched and scoochted farther away in response, pressing himself up against the door. He could hear Saeyoung drumming his fingers against the steering wheel, for some reason the sound put his nerves on edge.

“Why didn't you take MC instead? Clearly you put effort into whatever this is, so why bring me? It seems pointless, everything you do seems pointless.” Saehyun didn't mean to start venting his frustrations; but with their close proximity and the only sounds being the purr of the engine, he couldn't help it. “Why did you do it? Why would you just kidnap someone? What if someone finds us and you ruin your life?!” He was gradually raising his voice. “I don't want to see any of you behind bars, why would you be so stupid?!” He was screaming now, tears streaming down his face that he didn't realize formed in the first place.

“It was stupid, okay? Are you happy?” He replied exasperatedly; successfully cutting Saehyun off before he could continue his rant. “Do you think I wanted to-” he took in a deep breath as if he was struggling to speak. “You're my-!”

“Nothing! I'm your nothing! We never grew up together, we never had childhood memories together, we didn't even know the other existed until that shitty chance encounter!”

“You think I don't regret that, you think it doesn't weigh on my mind every night now?” Saehyun felt like his body had turned to ice at the tears lining Saeyoung's eyes. “That I ripped you away from your happy life, that I punched you, my own flesh and blood in the face...Not just once, but…” Saehyun's heart split in two when his voice shook. There was a pause as neither of them spoke. The silence hanging thick and heavy in the air before Saeyoung suddenly broke down into tears with him, stopping the car on the side of the road. He watched as the other took his glasses off before wiping his sleeve along his eyes.

Saehyun unbuckled his seat belt, reaching towards the lock on the door. This was the perfect chance to escape, the perfect time to leave. Saeyoung was too emotionally incapacitated to stop him. Though his body did something completely different. He barely registered turning and wrapping his arms around his brother instead. Holding Saeyoung close, the cramped space of the car be damned. He felt a sense of relief when his brother returned it.

They sat there venting about their frustrations these past couple of days, for quite a while. By the end of it they were laughing like idiots. Both of them joking around like that serious conversation had never happened. Saehyun felt light, like a huge weight had been lifted from his chest.

 

“This is my favorite place to go when I need to clear my head,” Saeyoung explained, sitting next to him and crossing his legs. The grass flattened under his weight as he brought a sandwich next to his lips, taking a large bite. Saehyun blinked in response, rubbing a hand over his eyes before sneezing. His body shook from the force of it, launching him backwards into the ground. Saeyoung proceeded to laugh at him afterwards, pointing at him while he teased him for it. He then ripped up some weeds and casually threw it at him in retaliation. Most of it was swept away by a stray breeze while the rest became tangled in his brother's identical red mane. “Hey, rude!” He stuck his tongue out at him, rolling away with a laugh when he tried to do the same back.

“This place is nice though,” he mumbled, his face now firmly planted into the dirt.

“How would you know? You can't see with your face in the ground,” Saeyoung chuckled as he suddenly felt sand and dirt being poured on his head.

“Ack, hey!” He exclaimed, rolling back over as he quickly brushed a hand through his hair to get it off.

“That's what you get! Plus your hair looks better that way, it looks more like mine~”

“What? A mess?” He grumbled angrily, trying to fix it. Though he was interrupted as Saeyoung slung an arm around him, bringing him close. He most likely didn't really want a hug, he just wanted to bug Saehyun...and it was working. “Stop that,” he whined as he tried to push the other away.

“Saehyun, don't run away, your hair looks good when it's like mine~”

“No, it doesn't!”

“You're another me, so you gotta look like me too!” He teased, ruffling Saehyun's hair again and giggling like an idiot when this only bothered him even more.

“I’m not another you because I'm at least ten times more handsome,” he countered.

“Mhmm and where's your wife?” Saeyoung jokingly asked.

“Vanderwood.” Saeyoung practically passed out laughing at that response. With his arms around Saehyun, he tipped backwards during his laughing fit which brought his brother with him. Saehyun tried to push his brother off only to fail miserably as he was forced to listen to how hilarious Saeyoung thought it would be to see Vanderwood in a wedding dress. Saehyun let an aggravated sigh pass his lips but smiled nonetheless, while Saeyoung hit him with an onslaught of bad jokes. He seemed happy and for some reason that made him happy in turn. “Is Saeran doing alright? He hasn't spoken to me for the past few days,” Saehyun asked once he was certain that his brother had stopped goofing around.

Saehyun hadn't spoken to Saeran for a couple days now; the last time he even spared him a glance was during that awkward conversation on the couch. It was like he despised him all of a sudden. He felt horrible every time Saeran would walk into the same room as him and promptly leave when he noticed he was there. He made it a habit now to do it in his stead. He could tell it was taking a toll on MC as well, she obviously wasn't happy with their suddenly declining relationship. Though, was it ever good to begin with? He wasn't sure, it felt like it was constantly flip flopping around. One second Saeran liked him and the next he was at his throat, literally. Now he just straight up ignored him.

“He's been struggling these past couple days. We've had to book him an emergency appointment with his therapist again.” Saeyoung ran a hand through his disheveled hair, a frown replacing his once cheerful smile. “I couldn't go with him and MC today because he said he didn't want to see my face more than he had to.” Saehyun blinked as realization dawned on his features. He felt his chest constrict around his lungs as he began running his digits through the grass below them.

“I'm-I’m sorry, I probably wasn't any help spouting useless bullshit at you in the car...I guess I was just frustrated.” Saeyoung pulled him into a hug and he yelped at the sudden urge the other had to shower him in affection.

“No it's fine, I needed that talk with you. I felt so much better after it, trust me. But most of all, I feel we both needed it.” Saehyun's heart throbbed almost painfully in his chest at his brother's words. He mentally returned the sentiment, a smile gracing his lips while his body felt light like he was floating on a cloud of hot air.

Pulling away, he reached for the sandwiches he had declined earlier. He unwrapped one from the plastic wrap it was coated in, stuffing the food into his mouth. Saeyoung laughed at his sudden eagerness to eat the meal he prepared, asking him if it was any good. The moment his tongue was assaulted with the taste of turkey, he instantly regretted it. “I just remembered how much I hate turkey.”

“You said that when we got here, did you forget?” Saehyun blinked, staring at nothing in particular while he tried to remember. “Then I told you there was tuna.”

“Oh, I remember now. Trade?”

“No, you just slobbered all over it,” Saeyoung teased, taking another bite of his own sandwich. Saehyun frowned, staring down at it for a few seconds before an idea popped into his head. Drawing his arm back behind him, he launched the rest of his meal into the pond in front of them. He threw Saeyoung a mischievous look when the other man whined at him for wasting it. Though he ignored his brother, focusing his attention instead on the hungry ducks now feasting upon its remains. “At least they appreciated my hard work,” he said, gesturing to small flock of birds.

“Oh please, all you did was slap two pieces of bread together,” Saehyun countered, letting out an 'oof’ when he was playfully elbowed.

“I did way more than that!” He exclaimed; Saehyun grabbing a drink and a different sandwich, making sure to check it carefully this time.

There was a peaceful silence between them that settled Saehyun's nerves. He brought his knees up to his chest, adjusting his sitting position into something more comfortable while they ate. His focus turned to the sun's rays as they danced across the surface of the slightly murky water. He could see it was coated in algae, strings of seaweed floating at the surface which had broken off from the main plant. All he could think about while looking at it was how uncomfortable it would be to swim in. He almost wondered what kinds of disgusting creatures lived in its depths. The thought of a leech sticking to his leg entering the forefront of his mind.

“It's pretty, huh?” He almost let out a laugh at how completely opposite that was to his own train of thought. “Do you know how to swim?” The wind whipped up, causing the water to sway back and forth to a silent tune. He had to squint when one particular ripple forced a beam of light to shoot straight into his eyes for a second.

“If you're planning on asking me to swim in that, I'm going to have to say no,” he started, opening his can of soda with a pop the moment he took the last bite out of his meal. “But yes, I do know how to swim. My parents had me take some swimming classes when I was in grade school.”

“Parents?” Saeyoung gave him a look while he took a swig of his drink.

“They're not my biological parents obviously, but that doesn't matter to me. They took me in and treated me as one of their own, so they're just as good.” He couldn't tell what emotion flashed behind Saeyoung's eyes as he explained himself but it wasn't nothing.

“What age did you meet them?” Saehyun licked his lips, tasting the remnants of his soda while he tried to conjure up an answer to Saeyoung's question.

“Uh, I think seven or eight? I can't remember, maybe younger than that,” he replied, scratching the back of his head. Saeyoung nodded casually, glancing away for a second.

“Where were you before?” There was a definite tone shift, Saeyoung sounded more serious and...angry? Though he was quick to cover it up.

“Um, just some dump, nothing special.” The longer Saeyoung questioned him about this the more uncomfortable he became. He could already feel nausea blooming in his stomach, the grip on the can in his hand growing tighter. Saeyoung was now intensely staring at his face. It was almost as if he was searching it for clues. Though he didn't continue questioning him, it was almost as if he could sense how uneasy Saehyun had become. Instead, the identical redhead, turned to grab himself another sandwich. An awkward silence filled the void between them, while the other chewed. Saehyun almost felt the urge to question him on his life but resisted it. He had a nagging feeling that if he brought it up that his brother would blame him for any inconveniences he experienced, similarly to Saeran.

“Do you actually crossdress?” Saehyun blurted out, causing the other man to almost choke on his current bite of food. The question was definitely random, but he kind of wanted to hear more makeup advice instead of the chomping of teeth.

“Yeah, of course I do. I could show you if you want~” his brother was back to the playful attitude he was in before. Saehyun almost found himself sighing in relief at the fact that the tension was now disappearing.

“Sure, sounds good,” he replied which caused Saeyoung to gawk stupidly at him for a few seconds.

“You know, if you want me to be your teacher, it's going to cost you~”

“I never said I wanted you to teach me, I'm just curious!” He exclaimed, a blush staining his features.

“Mmhmm~ sure you are~” Saehyun let out his second aggravated huff in a row that day. It had reached new a record for him by this point. Saeyoung now laughing loudly in amusement at the fact that he was clearly flustered.

 

Saehyun held a pile of clean clothes in his hands, now trudging towards the bathroom. He was utterly exhausted from his trip with Saeyoung and just wanted to soak in some nice warm water. Maybe he could find some bubble bath solution so he could cover himself in soothing suds.

Reaching for the copper colored door knob, he instantly paused when he noticed a familiar hand already placed around it. He glanced up at Saeyoung who was in nothing but his boxers, the sight caused him to instinctively turn away. “Don't you have any decency? Put on a shirt and some pants!” Saehyun exclaimed, glaring daggers at the ceiling like it was the cause of all his problems.

“I'm wearing boxers, it's not like I'm naked,” Saeyoung protested which only fueled Saehyun's annoyance. “Plus it's my house,” he whined.

“Boxers aren't pants and on top of that yours have holes in them,” Saehyun immediately pointed out, noticing his brother shift to look down at them like he hadn't realized it.

“Oh, I hadn't noticed that, whoops. But they're not that big~”

“You live with two other people besides your wife in ‘ _your_ ’ house right now, so keep some clothes on!” Saehyun exclaimed, flinging the bathroom door open before promptly closing it with a huff. He could hear Saeyoung whining at him from the other side about needing to use the bathroom first but ignored him. He could use a different washroom or the nearest bush for all he cared.

Rummaging through the room, he began his search for something relaxing to put in his bath. He began opening every cabinet and drawer in his exploration, his brother finally giving up and leaving. He smirked, feeling content at the silence that surrounded him while he delved through said brothers belongings. He paused when he noticed one of the drawers had a small opening underneath a box of shaving supplies. It looked like it was frequently fiddled around with. Like someone constantly used it, but why?

Sticking his digits inside, he wormed them around through the opening until his fingers grazed something cold and metallic. Grabbing it, he carefully maneuvered it out into plain view, his heart dropping into his stomach at what he found. A razor, caked in what appeared to be dried up blood. No, he knew it was blood. He could feel his chest constrict to a point where he was wheezing. To a point where breathing took a serious amount of effort. It didn't look old either and Saeyoung didn't have any visible wounds, at least not from a sharp object. So what if Saeran…?

He burst through the bathroom door, whizzing past a confused Saeyoung and MC who immediately asked him what was wrong. Though he didn't bother answering them, his attention focused purely on the worst case scenario. Fear burst from the seams of his mind and traveled through his veins. He had never been so scared in his life from an image he had conjured up out of his own presumptions.

The moment he was at Saeran’s bedroom door, he banged his fist loudly against it. A lot harder than he meant to at first, ignoring the fact that it was rattling on its hinges. He couldn’t care less about the door, though. Right now, Saeran was his main priority.

“Saeyoung…” a hoarse and weak voice called out on the other side. It was almost pleading, begging for the one he was calling to hear his cry. The complete opposite of what Saehyun expected, it just made him worry even further. “I was stupid.” Saehyun sucked in a breath, pressing his hand around the doorknob and turning it. He cursed under his breath when it was locked. “I shouldn't have done it again, but I felt so worthless.” Hearing Saeran explain himself just caused panic to run rampant through him, his senses high off adrenaline. He began to jerk the knob like that would somehow make a difference. “I'm so stupid, so dumb…” he kept repeating insults to himself like a mantra while Saehyun wanted so badly to comfort him. “Saeyoung, answer me! It hurts!”

Like they had some sort of psychic connection, Saeyoung was right next to him with a key in hand. An audible click later, the door was swung open revealing Saeran’s form slumped weakly across the ground. His eyes practically swollen shut from crying while snot and tears coated his face and his arms...god his arms. There wasn't a spot on them that wasn't drenched in red, his clothes not any better off.

Saehyun didn't even give himself time to think before he was on the other man. He instinctively went to stop any bleeding, grabbing a nearby piece of cloth to use as a tourniquet. He yelled for Saeyoung to bring him a first aid kit and MC to dial for emergency services or get a ride ready to bring him to the nearest hospital. Even if Saeran wasn't dying from his wounds, like hell was he not suffering mentally.

He ignored everything that was going on around him the moment he began his work, even the fact that Saeran was protesting that he was there to begin with. It was as if he had tunnel vision, only able to focus on closing his brothers wounds and administering first aid. All his medical knowledge rushing back to him as he fought to make sure Saeran was alright, that he was okay. It didn't matter how much the other bit, clawed or yelled. It really didn't, because all he could care about was that he would be alright.

Saehyun watched as Saeyoung and MC dragged Saeran out of building once his wounds had been sufficiently patched up. He was screaming and crying, each sound he made striking Saehyun’s heart in all the wrong ways. He almost felt the urge to sob with him, but this wasn't about him. This was about Saeran. So he pressed his lips together firmly until the front door shut behind them until he knew he was alone in the bunker-like residence. He was relatively sure both MC and Saeyoung had thanked him, maybe even hugged him before they left, but it barely registered. The amount of worry he had felt for his brother taking over his thoughts.

Once silence filled the space around him, he could feel the adrenaline quickly leave his body. He suddenly felt his legs give out under him as he finally let himself break down, crashing from the high he was riding on just moments ago. He didn't bother moving from his position on the living room floor. He was shaking too badly from wave after wave of intense emotions to give a damn.

He clenched his eyes shut tight, trying his hardest to even out his breathing. He dug his fingers into the carpet that surrounded him. Using it as a lifeline to keep him grounded in reality, from floating off into his own twisted world. He didn't know how long he had been laying there or whether he had fallen asleep; but when he came to, he was being shaken rather roughly. A worried, yet familiar voice ringing in his ears.

The hand on his shoulder helped him slowly regain consciousness, his vision landing on the soft brown locks of a man he was almost too relieved to see. Upon the other noticing he was awake, he was quickly grabbed and brought into a hug while the words ‘thank god’ were whispered into his ear. Saehyun blinked in response to Vanderwood soothingly running his hands through his crimson strands.

“Christ, I thought I walked in on your dead body. You almost gave me a heart attack,” Vanderwood explained, eyes running over his form. “Where are you injured? Take off your clothes,” he practically demanded, though Saehyun shook his head. “Saehyun, I'm not playing this game with you. You're covered in blood, so do it now,” he instructed, almost akin to a stern mother.

“It's not my blood,” he replied, causing the former agent to give him a confused look. “It's Saeran’s, he hurt himself so I tended to him,” he added to his previous explanation.

“Saeran? What the hell happened?”

“I don't know, Saeyoung and MC are bringing him to the hospital right now. We didn't fight, if that's what you're thinking,” he admitted, realizing he was still being held in an awkward embrace. For some reason it comforted him, so he decided not to bring attention to it.

“Like hell, you didn't. You're covered in bruises and bitemarks,” Vanderwood pointed out.

“He wasn't exactly happy I was the one treating his wounds.” Vanderwood let out a huff, which sounded like a mix between annoyance and relief. Moving to pinch the bridge of his nose, still not separating from Saehyun.

“He doesn't even let me look at him and I've known him longer than you have.” Saehyun nodded, realizing it wasn't the smartest thing to do. He most likely severely damaged his relationship with Saeran and it wasn't very good to begin with. But at the time he had been too worried to place any thought into the consequences. “Let me see your injuries anyways, if even one of those bites pierced your skin it could cause a serious infection.” Saehyun let out a surprised yelp when he was swiftly pulled off the ground with ease. Vanderwood keeping a firm grip on him while he steadied his jittery limbs. “Also, next time you decide to take a nap, don't do it on the fucking living room floor.”

Saehyun let out a laugh, “I don't know, I kind of liked you worrying for me,” he teased; almost ending up back on the carpet when Vanderwood playfully nudged him with his elbow.

“Don't be a smartass,” the brunet scolded as the pair walked towards Saehyun’s bedroom.

 

He didn't know how it started or why either him or Vanderwood thought it would be a great idea to brew some tea and watch a horror movie, but they did. And so far, Saehyun found himself enjoying it. He brushed his hair aside that was still wet from taking a quick shower, training his eyes on the TV. He was huddled under a warm blanket, the tea making his insides even warmer. It was all so calming and relaxing, something his mind and body had desperately needed. He wondered how much this whole ordeal with being kidnapped and dealing with...this...whatever this was, had effect on his mental state. He gripped the handle of his mug just a bit tighter, not really excited to be seeing his therapist again. Seeing something he thought he had finally gotten past. He shook his head, now wasn't the time to be contemplating that; he had other priorities.

“Do you think Saeyoung will be okay?” Saehyun asked the moment the credits rolled. His golden eyes drifted down to the murky, steaming liquid swirling around in his cup which reflected the rolling lines of text from the screen in front of him. “I-I’m worried about him. I made him cry earlier today and now this. Do you think he can handle it?” He asked the older man sitting next to him.

“He'll be fine, he's gone through a lot worse than this,” Vanderwood reassured, patting his unsure redheaded companion on the back.

“Worse than this…” Saehyun trailed off, going deep into his own thoughts. His eyes flicking across the room while he bit his lower lip, worrying it between his teeth. “I know it's not really my fault and it's not healthy to blame myself, but in a way I feel like maybe what happened to Saeran... What's happening to Saeyoung right now, is because of me. Maybe if I had...I don't know,” he rambled helplessly, taking another sip of his tea.

“Don't be stupid, none of this is your fault or your responsibility. You never even asked to be here,” Vanderwood replied, casually leaning back against the sofa.

Saehyun glanced to his side, the steam from his drink rolling around his cheeks and causing them to turn a soft pink. “I know it's stupid, but it's just how I feel. Maybe if I had paid more attention to my surroundings I might've met Saeyoung sooner, I might've been able to help. Just like she helped me…” Saehyun jumped when his mug was forcefully pulled from his hands and placed on the coffee table next to Vanderwood’s own. The older male tugging at Saehyun’s blanket and hiking it up further towards the redhead’s chin.

“Don’t even think about blaming yourself for that, it's annoying. So just shut up and watch this next movie,” Vanderwood said, glaring daggers at the TV while he fiddled with the remote.

“Romance? But you said you hated romance,” Saehyun commented the moment his brown-haired companion hit play. They had this discussion prior to beginning their movie session, about what genres they would and wouldn't watch. Vanderwood had very much protested against cheesy romantic flicks.

“Yeah, but you like it,” he replied, handing Saehyun back his mug the moment the movie started. Saehyun brought the beverage to his lips once more, gazing over at Vanderwood as he did so. What was their relationship? Were they friends? Acquaintances? A friend of a friend? Or maybe a friend's brother that you had to be nice to because they're your friend’s brother? Ugh, he needed to stop thinking and just relax. It didn't matter anyways, as long as his relationship with him wasn't punching bag he was fine. “You're not even paying attention.” Upon being caught, he quickly turned his head back towards the TV, whispering a quick 'sorry’.

As the movie played out, Saehyun couldn't help but smile slightly at the cute romantic scenes. Though the state his brothers were in constantly worming its way to the forefront of his mind, made his happiness short lived. Every time the main leads would do something endearing, all he could picture was MC and Saeyoung. Maybe they would be enjoying their evening right now if he had-. He cut his thoughts short, running his hand along his face before finishing off the last of his tea. “I'm going to go get some more,” he announced, getting up and trudging over to the kitchen.

 

Saehyun was laying in bed, eyes half-lidded and his room draped in darkness when he heard a knock at his door. At first he thought he was imagining things, the knock was so soft and timid that his ears had barely picked it up. Then it resounded through the room, a little more confident this time. Now he knew he wasn’t hearing things.

Saehyun sat up, rubbing the sleep from his eyes before flicking on the lamp next to his bedside. He shuffled out from under his covers, sluggishly walking towards the door before opening it. He blinked when he noticed MC standing there, looking like she had just finished crying her heart out. He frowned at the thought, glancing down the hall expecting to see Saeyoung standing behind her but he was nowhere to be found.

“Sorry, did I wake you?” She spoke, her voice hoarse. Her normally very well maintained hair was sticking up every which way like she had been spun through a dryer. To say she looked horrible was an understatement.

“No, I couldn’t really get to sleep anyways,” He replied, running his tongue along his bottom lip.

“Me neither,” she responded, letting out a dry laugh. A laugh that held no humor or happiness. They stared at each other, silence hanging thick in the air as neither really knew what to do next. How to help the other in this situation.

“Do you want to come in, or…?” Saehyun suggested, gesturing behind him into his room. MC blinked before nodding, a small smile gracing her lips.

“That would be nice, thank you.” Saehyun stepped out of the way, following MC as she moved to sit on his bed. He sat next to her, fiddling with his thumbs. “You look cute with your hair all messy like that,” she piped up the moment he felt the mattress dip under his weight.

“Why the heck do you and Saeyoung like my bed head so much? It’s really not that amazing, I would like it more if you commented on the hair I actually put effort into,” He whined with a pout, crossing his arms. MC giggled softly at his reaction, placing a hand on his arm while she did so.

“Nah, I take it back. Everything about you is adorable,” she teased. Saehyun let out an irritated huff in response which only seemed to amuse his brother’s wife even more. There was another pause as neither of them spoke, MC staring at Saehyun’s face like she had something on her mind. Something she wanted to voice but couldn’t get past her lips. The hand on his arm gripped his pajama top with more force then before. As if holding onto him just a little bit tighter would give her the courage to speak.

“Where’s Saeyoung?” Saehyun asked, breaking the ice for her. He was starting to feel guilty when the expression she was giving him practically read that she was struggling to think up something to say. Or perhaps how to phrase what she wanted to say.

“Oh!” He hadn’t meant to startle her. “He’s at the hospital with Saeran,” She explained, absentmindedly running her fingers along his arm and causing his skin to pebble. Saehyun shifted slightly, unable to process why she was being so handsy all of a sudden. Maybe she just needed the physical contact? Neither her husband nor her brother-in-law were in a very good place right now, it was most likely stressing her out; so he opted not to bring attention to it.

“You’re not with them?” He said quizzically, giving her a confused look. She nodded, letting out a shaky breath and pressing herself flush against him. Did-did she want a hug? He thought, going stone still at the feeling of her body touching his.

“I figured they needed some time alone with just the two of them. I didn’t want to interfere and ruin their relationship anymore then I already did, especially when it was just getting better,” She answered. Then she already did? The hell was she talking about? Did she punch one of them on the way there? Because neither of them had a problem with her, they had a problem with him.

“I’m obviously the issue here, I don’t know what you’re talking about. If anything I would recommend you stay there in case they start fighting.”

“Yeah cause that really worked the last time and the time before that,” she replied with a roll of her eyes. She then let out an empty chuckle as she seemed to remember something, “maybe I should have Vanderwood watch them,” she added, sniffling loudly. “Or maybe Vanderwood should just take my place and marry Saeyoung instead,” she exclaimed, shoving her face into his shoulder. Saehyun stiffened but didn’t move away, she was obviously just venting her frustrations. Maybe this would be the best thing for her right now.

“No, I would be jealous. Vanderwood’s my wife already,” he replied, becoming surprised when MC laughed.

“What?” She asked in disbelief, giggling slightly. “And you didn’t invite me to your wedding?”

“We didn’t want Saeyoung crashing in on the reception,” He said in jest, smiling when she laughed again.

“I could see him doing that,” MC giggled, turning her attention away for a second. “Have you eaten dinner?” She asked, opening her mouth in a yawn.

“Yeah, my wife cooked for me. But in all seriousness, I really shouldn't even be on your mind right now. You should just go and get some sleep since you're not really in the state to drive back.”

“I can't sleep though, not with this going on. Plus, I don't know if you really ate or not.”

“You seem pretty tired to me,” Saehyun rebutted, causing the younger woman to let out a whiny groan in protest.

“Maybe I can just sleep with you,” she half-joked. In a way it almost sounded like she was tempted to.

“Yeah, no thank you, I don't need Saeyoung murdering me in my sleep.”

“You mean if I was still single, you would?” She asked sarcastically with a flutter of her eyelashes.

“You can at least take me out to dinner first, I have standards,” he replied in a goofy voice, causing her to burst out into a laughing fit.

“I was offering you dinner though~” She definitely seemed like she was in a better mood now. That was a relief, but at the same time he wondered how long that would last. The moment she left, her current situation would most likely come crashing back down on her happiness once more.

“Fine, let's watch a movie and you can make me the food you offered.” She smiled brightly at that, practically pulling him towards the living room in her excitement.

For a second time in a row that night, Saehyun ate supper. Afterwards they sat and watched a few movies of MC's choosing. Most of which were comedy, though she picked a romance one near the end for him. He was almost slightly offended when she passed out halfway through that one, but couldn't shut her yap every other movie. Though he easily brushed the annoyance off, picking her up, carrying her to her own room and tucking her into bed. He rubbed the back of his neck, shutting off the lights and door behind him before making his way back to his own.

 

Saehyun’s eyes cracked open, sucking a string of saliva into his mouth. He was being shaken roughly, almost desperately. His gaze focused on the form of his brother, who was standing next to his bed with the most solemn expression he had ever had the honor of seeing on his face. Saehyun rubbed a hand across his cheeks, letting out a yawn and squinting at the light shining in through the hallway.

“Saeyoung? What's wrong?” He asked.

“I just-I-” Saeyoung stared at him, his eyes searching desperately for something; though Saehyun wasn’t quite sure what. Saehyun smacked his lips, waiting for the other to continue as he sat up. He noticed him flicking his gaze to the doorway as if he had second thoughts about this whole encounter, but something else was keeping him rooted in his current position.

“Is Saeran okay?” Saehyun asked, barely getting the words past his lips in his tired state.

“I-yes?” Why was he phrasing that like a question? It’s not like Saehyun knew what the hell was going on.

“You don’t know?” Saehyun asked; running a hand through his hair, Saeyoung mimicking him with his own.

“I do, it’s just that-well MC is with him now and he was-” Saehyun could tell now that Saeyoung was very much sleep deprived and stressed out. His mind jumbled and his words occasionally incoherent. It was a miracle he drove back home in one piece.

“What are you doing, still awake? You’re of no help to anybody running around mumbling and freaking out. You shouldn’t have been driving at all in the state your in!” Saehyun scolded, frowning when that only seemed to cause Saeyoung’s mood to drop even lower.

“I can’t lose him again, Saehyun, I can’t!” Saehyun stared him with wide eyes as he seemed to almost be breaking down before him. “Sometimes you look so much like how he used to. When we were kids and it-” Saeyoung suddenly clenched his eyes shut tight, tugging slightly at his hair in his frustration. Saehyun could see it plain as day on his brother’s face that he was beyond exhausted, both emotionally and physically. “It hurts…” His brother's tone of voice caused his heart to clench almost painfully and tears to spring forth like he was the one in anguish. He slowly reached out to the other man, his fingers pausing above his arm.

“You're a strong person Saeyoung,” he started, finally placing his hand around the identical redhead’s wrist. His fingers curling around the fabric of his shirt, creasing the cotton underneath his grip. “You can get through this, you both can get through this. Saeran will be fine, you'll be fine. This is just another bump in the road and yeah it sucks,” he continued, their attention focused purely on the other. “But just because it's hard, doesn't mean you have to suffer through it alone. Don't take this burden by yourself, sometimes it's healthy to let it out.” He paused as he tried to read Saeyoung’s emotions. “I'm here too.” His hold tightened encouragingly as he spoke. “I want to be here for you, because-because I care about you.”

“Saehyun…” He pulled Saeyoung into a hug before he could finish his sentence. Before he could continue whatever nonsense it was that he wanted to say. He smiled when the other seemed to release a content sigh the moment their arms wrapped around each other. He couldn't help but soothingly run his hand up and down Saeyoung’s back.

“Do you want to hear a story? I still need to pay you back for that time you read me one~” he teased, smirking when Saeyoung let out a shaky laugh.

“Sure, I forgot why I came in here anyways.”


	7. Forgiveness Is The Key To Happiness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone, sorry this chapter is a little shorter than usual but I swear the next update will be a bit longer. Unlike last time, this chapter is much fluffier so at least there's that. As usual, please, please leave your thoughts in the comment section below (or a kudos if you're not good with words) I would really appreciate it. Now without further ado, please enjoy the chapter~
> 
> A big thanks to Robyn and Lokiiwood(undersans), I love you guys <3 
> 
> Warning!: Contains major spoilers and possible triggering themes, read at your own risk.
> 
> Tumblr: [@aromaticboar](https://aromaticboar.tumblr.com)  
> Ko-fi: [@Xenolith](https://ko-fi.com/aromaticboar)

Saeran came back from the hospital a day later. His arms were wrapped in gauze and MC was taking extra care of him. There wasn't a time where she wasn't babying him. In a way, Saehyun found it kind of cute. Especially since he noticed the slight blush and smile gracing his brothers features each time she would hand feed him. He had to suppress a laugh when Saeyoung tried to do the same; Saeran cussing him out, it was almost comical. Though he felt lonely that he couldn't join. After all, it wouldn't be spying if he made his presence known.

Ever since he had been told Saeran was coming back, Saehyun made sure to stay out of sight. He felt if he showed up that Saeran would immediately drop whatever good mood he was in and that wasn't something he wanted. If their relationship was to heal, he would have to be slow and take baby steps. Saeran needs to be the one who sets the pace and then he would go with the flow. No more jumping in at inopportune times.

Saehyun’s hands gripped the edge of the wall as he watched the trio interact. They were like a family, all smiles and laughter. He frowned when he realized that was because he wasn't there. He downcasted his gaze towards the ground, turning to walk back to his room. The echo of laughter following his every step while he walked as silently as a cat on the prowl. He felt if he made a single sound he would become the killer of their happiness. A happiness they so badly deserved right now.

He slowly opened his door, closing it behind him with a soft click. What to do, what to do, he thought to himself before rummaging through his belongings. He stopped when his hand landed on his cell phone. He turned it back on, noting it was almost dead. Calling, texting or his data still didn't work, he realized while he fiddled with the small device. The last messages his sister sent him still causing tears to spring to his eyes. He closed the app before he had time to read them over. He didn't want to look again.

Turning it around in his hand, he popped the back of his phone open, his eyes landing on his empty sim card slot. So that's why it wasn't working. He dug through his bag for a spare, subconsciously. He always kept a new one in an empty pill container, or at least his sister made sure he kept a spare one so he could always contact her. He blinked when he found it, dumping the contents into his hands. Wait, it was still there. He stared at the small chip resting in his palm. Why hadn't he thought to check before?

Though he wasn't overjoyed like he thought he would be. He had an out and yet...and yet it felt so wrong. He could feel nausea bite at his stomach, shoving it back where he had found it like he was hiding away his deepest darkest secrets. Is this what people called stockholm syndrome? Because the thought of the consequences they would face made him bite down hard on his finger to stifle a whine. He couldn't do that to them, he couldn't. Why hadn't they seen that?

He let out a loud yelp when he heard a knock at the door. Turning to it like he had been caught stealing at the supermarket by an off-duty officer. He was shivering slightly, practically tossing his bag across the room in a panic. It landed on his bed with a soft thud as the door opened behind him.

“Saehyun, are you hungry? MC wants to make you-what’s wrong?!” It was Saeyoung, his voice quickly shifting to worry when he noticed Saehyun sitting on the floor, shaking.

“Uh, I don't feel very good. Maybe I shouldn't have eaten your pancakes this morning. It probably poisoned me,” he lied.

“What? But I worked so hard on those pancakes!” He retaliated, stepping towards Saehyun. “I even checked the expiry date on all the ingredients beforehand.”

“Are you saying you don't normally do that?” Saehyun huffed, side-eyeing the other man.

“N-no! I'm just saying I did do it,” he rebutted, pushing his hand up against Saehyun’s forehead.

“I don't believe you. Also, I don't have a fever, it's my stomach,” he informed, Saeyoung removing himself from him.

“Oh, MC can make you some tea, it always helps me when I'm sick. But why are you sitting on the floor?”

“I tripped,” he deadpanned.

“I don't believe you,” he mocked, sitting down next to his identical-looking sibling. They stared at each other, both trying to keep a serious expression on their faces which slowly contorted over time. Eventually, Saehyun lost their little staring contest as he began snorting, trying to stifle his giggles with his knuckles. “You lost, now tell me what's wrong~”

“I wasn't laughing, I was choking,” he replied.

“Choking on your lies!” Saeyoung exclaimed excitedly, reaching out both hands to grab him. Saehyun rolled away, laughing like a child as he got up and retreated to the side of his bed. Saeyoung followed him, trying to block off his exits as he smacked his brother in the head with a nearby pillow. “My glasses!” He squawked, said glasses flying off his face onto the floor. “You'll pay for that~”

“It was self-defence,” he replied crawling across the bed to get away, only for Saeyoung to run around to the other side. He then turned and went back in response, the two of them going back and forth like a couple of dorks.

“You can't run forever~” Saehyun noticed MC was now standing in the doorway with a huge smile plastered on her face while she watched them. Though he wasn't able to look for very long since he was forced to dodge out of the way of another incoming attack from his brother.

“MC, save me!” Saehyun jokingly begged, panting as he used another pillow as his shield.

“No, MC, help your beloved husband. He smacked my glasses off!”

“Your glasses? Oh no, that is a crime that can not go unpunished,” she chuckled, moving to join in.

Saehyun was already struggling with just Saeyoung but now that MC had joined the enemy’s ranks, he quickly became outnumbered and outgunned. He fell back onto the bed, a pillow barrage hitting him square in the face while he suffered through his defeat. He sputtered and flailed his arms in vain as it did nothing to deter the happy couple.

“I give, I give!” He shouted, panting when they removed their 'weapons’ away from him. He couldn't help but smile when they high fived each other triumphantly, MC giving a little cheer.

“You're under arrest, Saehyun Choi, for not listening to your big brother and for knocking off his glasses,” Saeyoung teased.

“We'll have to sentence you to dish duty,” MC tried to say in an intimidating voice but failed miserably.

“No please, it was self-defence. Saeyoung threatened to knock off my glasses.”

MC gasped, putting a hand to her lips dramatically. “Saeyoung, you didn't?!”

“No babe, it's a lie. I would never~”

“That's it, dish duty for you too!” Saehyun stuck out his tongue teasingly upon the declaration of Saeyoung's punishment, only to get whacked in the face with a pillow once more.

 

Saehyun stared down at his tea, the brown liquid rippling with his every exhale. After he had washed dishes with Saeyoung, which ended up being MC's biggest mistake since all they started doing was playing with the bubbles like a couple of children, MC made him some tea. Luckily through that whole ordeal, he still hadn't run into Saeran. Apparently, he was asleep, the hospital not being the most comfortable or relaxing place to get some shut eye. Saehyun had only ever gone to a hospital to learn, it was an intense environment, even for a student. Fortunately, he had never gotten injured or sick enough to go there for any kind of treatment. Though he knew all too well how exhausting it could be, even for a patient.

Taking a sip from his tea, he nodded happily at its taste. Apple and cinnamon, he officially adored that combination. He snapped his attention away from it when he heard footsteps approaching the couch. He expected it to be either Saeyoung or MC but instead, he felt his skin crawl when it turned out to be Saeran.

His crimson locks stuck out every which way like he had just rolled out of bed. Which was different from his normally brushed and well-maintained style. He was wearing a baggy long sleeve shirt over some sweatpants, his bare feet slapping against the flooring with each step. “Saeyoung, do you have that tea MC makes?” He asked, rubbing his eyes. Gosh, he had bags for his bags, Saehyun thought as the other approached. But at least he didn't know who he was really talking to yet.  
  
Saehyun cleared his throat, trying to make his voice sound deeper. He had a much higher pitched voice than his brother, it was the reason he was able to sound so feminine when singing. Though in this situation he had a feeling it would give him away; but if he stayed quiet, Saeran would most likely get upset. “Yeah, do you want me to get MC to make you some?” He asked.

“No, I don't want to bother her more than I already have,” he whispered, sitting down next to Saehyun.

“I'm sure it's not a big deal, MC enjoys being with you. She loves you after all,” Saehyun covered his mouth to prevent himself from smiling when Saeran started blushing.

“R-really?” He stuttered, fiddling with his fingers nervously.

“I'm one hundred percent sure!” Saehyun tried to pull off Saeyoung’s overly cheerful tone only to practically cough out a lung. He covered it up with a laugh to not look suspicious. “Sorry, tea went down the wrong way~”

“Idiot,” Saeran replied, glancing away for a second. “I haven't seen Saehyun around, w-where is he?” Saehyun’s heart practically skipped a beat at that question.

“Saehyun’s probably in his room, reading a book or something,” Saehyun reassured. It was so weird referring to himself in the third person.

“Oh.” Well, that was the end of that. He felt almost disappointed that he didn't want to ask or say anything more about him.

“Do you want my tea? I haven't really touched it. I'm going to go check on MC, see if she's doing okay.”

“Is something wrong with her?!” Saehyun was startled at the amount of worry reflected in his brother's gaze.

“No, she just went to do something 'real quick’ and hasn't come back. I'm just gonna go check to see if she's having trouble, I'll be right back~” he singsonged, practically bolting out of the room. That probably seemed suspicious, but whatever. He was just relieved he didn't have to be there anymore.

Walking back to his room, he paused when he realized it would probably make Saeran angry if he never returned. Or if Saeyoung never returned, that is. Turning around, he began searching for MC. Peeking through every door and around every corner until his eyes landed on her lithe frame. His face lighting up in a blush when he noticed Saeyoung had her splayed out across the top of a washing machine. They appeared to be off in their own little world, not even noticing Saehyun approach while his brother ravaged the smaller woman's neck with his mouth.

He knocked awkwardly on the open door, looking away while the two slowly separated. “S-sorry for interrupting but Saeran needs you,” he mumbled barely above a whisper. Gosh, his face was basically on fire, this was so uncomfortable.

“You two are talking?” MC asked excitedly, the irritated huff Saeyoung released, not going unnoticed by Saehyun. He mentally apologized for getting in the way of his fun. He probably needed it after all that stress, but how was he supposed to know?

“Uh, not exactly. He thought I was Saeyoung and I didn't want him to get upset so I just played along.” Saehyun explained, rubbing the back of his neck. He still wasn't able to get himself to look either one of them in the face. “I said I was going to check on you, so it's probably best if you go back and show him you're okay.”

“Geeze, Saehyun. You interrupt us and have nothing good to say? I'm so angry,” MC said in a teasing voice. The movement out of the corner of his eyes told him that she had moved her hands to her hips.

“I'm sorry, I'll make it up to you. I'll uh-I’ll uh, cook dinner?” He suggested, fiddling with his fingers awkwardly.

“Hmmm, tempting offer. What do you think, babe?” She asked as Saeyoung let out an 'oof’ when she elbowed him playfully. “Stop moping,” she scolded.

“I think I'm hungry for something else,” he replied, pinching MC in response and causing her to yelp before swatting his hand away. He had a playful grin on his face, trying to do it again only for her to sidestep his attempt to bug his own wife. “Don't run away, I need you~” he whined, wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her flush against him. She was laughing loudly, trying to pull away from her husband while he growled like some sort of wildcat, up against her ear. Saehyun took that as his cue to leave. He was just about done watching this couple's antics.

He turned away from them, stopping dead in his tracks when he noticed Saeran rounding the corner. Shit, shit, shit, he cursed mentally, quickly ducking into a bathroom and shutting the door. He let out a relieved sigh when he hadn't been noticed, now listening in on the three of them chat.

“Saeran, you're awake! How are you feeling?” MC asked, in her usual cheerful tone. He could hear the shuffling of feet in what he assumed was the two of them drawing in closer to each other, pressing his ear up against the barrier between them to hear better.

“Tired...are you doing okay? Do you need help with the laundry?” Saehyun was glad he didn't notice the change in 'Saeyoung’s’ outfit.

“No, I just got it done, actually. Thanks though, hun.” Hun? He had a feeling Saeran just about burst into flames at the utterance of such an affectionate word, being directed at him. “Shouldn't you go back to bed? I don't want you straining yourself right now.”

“Yeah, probably. I was kinda hungry though,” Saeran whispered, sounding somewhat flustered.

“Oh, well luckily, Saehyun just volunteered to make us dinner,” MC singsonged.

“If he and Saeyoung are anything alike in their cooking skills, then I'm not hungry anymore.”

“Hey!” Saehyun almost felt the urge to yell that along with his brother. He was not nearly that bad. “I worked really hard on those pancakes this morning and you said you liked them!”

“There's a first time for everything.” Saehyun had to hold in a laugh at that response before stepping away from the door. There was no point in continuing to listen to their chatter, he already knew Saeran hadn't suspected anything.

Glancing around the small bathroom, he figured he might as well use it while he waited for them to leave. The only furnishings in here was a small sink, a mirror and a toilet. It wasn't a full bathroom, most likely one used for guests or simply if the other one was already in use. He shrugged, turning on the tap and splashing water onto his face.

 

Saehyun carefully measured out a teaspoon of salt like he was doing some sort of chemistry experiment. Too much and it would explode, too little and it wouldn't react properly. Or maybe it was akin to writing up a prescription, too much and- Saehyun shook his head. What the hell was he thinking? It was definitely not that complex.

He dumped the salt into a stainless steel bowl of ground beef, telling himself something along the lines of 'good enough’. Though he instantly paused as he went to mix the meat in with the rest of the spices. What if it wasn't, ‘good enough’ though?

Vanderwood decided to make his presence known right at that moment. Just about giving the redheaded triplet a heart attack when he came up behind him.

“You scared me,” Saehyun let out a breath, holding a hand over his chest to still his beating heart.

“You're too jumpy,” Vanderwood commented, leaning over his shoulder to see what he was doing. The hairs on Saehyun’s neck stood up at the feeling of the older man's locks brushing against the side of his face. “What are you making?” He asked.

“Hamburgers, Saeyoung mentioned liking them so I searched for a recipe in MC’s cookbooks,” he mumbled almost shyly. “American recipes are...strange.”

“You should mix it with your hands,” Vanderwood suggested, causing the smaller of the two to almost gag.

“I'm not touching raw meat with my bare hands!” He exclaimed like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“Why not?”

“It's unsanitary and disgusting and…” Saehyun finished his sentence by sticking out his tongue as if he was about to hurl.

Vanderwood proceeded to roll his eyes, “you're such a child,” he stated, pushing Saehyun aside to do it for him. “You didn't put enough nutmeg either.”

“I put the exact amount that it asked for, I even carefully measured it five times over,” he declared, giving the other a confused look when he laughed at him. “What's so funny?” He whined.

“Nothing, forget it.”

“No, tell me,” Saehyun urged, yelping when he was promptly flicked in the forehead.

“Stop whining and go grease the pan,” Vanderwood scolded, completely changing the subject. Saehyun mocked the brunette under his breath while he followed his instructions, putting the pan onto the stove with a loud bang. “What was that?” Vanderwood said, tossing a glare in his direction.

“N-nothing!”

“Thought so.”

“What are we making?” MC asked, stepping into the room just as Vanderwood began arguing with Saehyun over burning the patties. There was a pile of slightly charred burgers sitting next to the stove on a plate. Steam rolled into the air away from them, the smell that something had been overcooked distinctly wafting through the air. “Hello?” MC said again when neither of them paid her any attention, continuing their bickering.

“I told you to flip them when the underside turned a dark brown,” Vanderwood said through grit teeth.

“No, you told me to flip them after five minutes, which I did!” Saehyun exclaimed, throwing his arms up momentarily.

“But if they turn brown before that, you can flip them,” he growled.

“How am I supposed to know if they're brown, if the side that is brown is facing the pan?!” Saehyun asked exasperatedly.

“Now you're just asking stupid questions and I know you're not that dumb!”

“Alright, you two, break it up,” MC said, stepping between them. It's not like they were going to get into a fist fight but they were bickering quite loudly. “Saeran is trying to sleep and the burgers aren't even that bad for a first attempt,” she said with a chuckle as Saehyun stuck his tongue out at Vanderwood the moment she stopped talking. She let out a sigh, most likely wondering if she was surrounded by children.

“They're still burned,” Vanderwood argued.

“A little, but they're still salvageable,” MC reassured while Saeyoung sat at the dining room table with an amused expression plastered on his face.

“Vandy, back again?” He said in a playful voice, causing everyone to turn their attention towards him. “I don't give you my blessings to date my little brother, by the way. He's cute, I'll admit that, but he's still too young. I can't let you steal away his innocence~”

“What the hell are you on about?” Vanderwood asked irritatedly.

“Yeah, we're already married,” Saehyun joked. MC busted a gut laughing in response to that, placing a hand on the counter as she gulped in air between laughs. “What will the kids say?” he added.

“That their deadbeat father can't cook a fucking burger,” Vanderwood tried to say seriously but ended up laughing near the end. Saehyun followed suit, he was almost too pleased that Vanderwood joined in on the now running joke.

 

“Stay alert, don’t turn your attention anywhere else,” Vanderwood instructed, a fist flying by Saehyun’s head as he narrowly ducked out of the way. Shuffling to the side, his feet uncoordinatedly smacked into each other causing the redhead to lose his footing. He flailed his arms wildly, trying to steady himself only to have his body forcefully slammed into a nearby wall. “I said to pay attention,” the older man repeated, hands moving to his throat. Saehyun instantly began to panic, moving his hands to grip at the other’s closed fists before clawing at it desperately. He was panting and gasping, sweat dripping down the sides of his face.

After supper, Vanderwood declared that he would teach Saehyun how to defend himself. He nor Saeyoung were given a chance to protest before he was being dragged to his brother’s garage. It was barren aside from his expensive sports cars so it was the perfect place to get into a tussle. Of course, Saeyoung didn’t believe that at first, whining adamantly that they would destroy his babies. So, he was stood off to the side, guarding them with his life.

“No, what do you do when someone grabs you in a choke hold?” Vanderwood questioned, pushing a little harder on his neck. It wasn’t enough to cut off his airway, but it sent fear coursing through his body. For a reason he could not explain, all he could imagine was the angry face of one his brothers, with nothing but hatred displayed across their features, directed only towards him. It sent his mind spiralling, making it hard for him to focus on any particular thought.

“Um-I-I don’t-”

“In a fight, you don’t have time to think!” The brunette scolded, tossing him onto the ground before he could reply. His form slid across the smooth concrete, halting a few feet away from its original position. His fingers pressed against the cold hard surface of the flooring while he tried to get up, yelping when he was slammed back down by the sole of a shoe to his chest.

“Can we stop? I can’t breathe, I need a-”

“You don’t have time for breaks, by this point you would be dead. Now get up!” Saehyun groaned, laying his head back while his hair flattened out around him. He flung an arm over his eyes, becoming unmoving in retaliation.

“Ease up, would you? Do you want to nurse him back to health again?” Saeyoung asked, walking towards them before helping the identical redhead off the ground. Saehyun let out a huff, leaning against his brother slightly to regain to his breath. Once he did, he stepped away and brushed an arm over his forehead to wipe away the sweat. This is why he hated exercising, now he smelt putrid and was covered in his own bodily fluids.

“I wouldn't strike him hard enough to injure him, I’m not an idiot,” Vanderwood replied; Saehyun fumbling with a water bottle that had been placed off to the side, next to some towels. When he finally removed the cap, he practically gulped it down like he had trekked through the desert for days on end without anything to drink.

“You okay?” Saeyoung asked with a chuckle, water trickling down the others chin and onto the floor through his enthusiasm to become hydrated once more.

“No, I think I’m dying,” Saehyun over exaggerated, plopping himself down onto the ground due to the fact that standing was beginning to take too much effort.

“You’re such a child,” Vanderwood spat, crossing his arms over his chest.

Saehyun took a second to run his golden eyes over the other man’s form. Unlike him, he had barely broken a sweat and he didn’t look tired or worn in the least bit; though it made sense, considering the former agent was quite a bit more muscular than he was. Okay, maybe more than a ‘bit’.

Saehyun couldn’t help but trace the outline of each muscle with his gaze, stopping at the other’s abs which were almost visible through the thin fabric of his t-shirt. He could feel something churn in his stomach at the sight, though he didn’t understand what it was. Maybe envy or jealousy? No, he never really cared for such things before. He took another sip from his water bottle to clear his head. There was no point dwelling, it didn’t matter anyway.

“Alright, I'm ready for round two,” Saehyun joked, wiping off his face with a towel. He placed the bottle down, getting into a stance that Vanderwood had just taught him. He licked his lips, lapping up any excess water left there. Man, his muscles were already beginning to ache. Why did he feel he was already going to regret this tonight? All he could imagine was trying to get to sleep while his muscles ached in protest.

“Good, spread your legs a bit more though,” Vanderwood commented.

“Are you sure that's all you want him to do?” Was Saeyoung’s snide remark, causing Saehyun to sputter and cough on his own spit.

Vanderwood glared at him, “if you're not going to be useful then go back to your fucking cars,” he ground out.

 

Darkness blanketed the living room, the only light being the flashing images of the TV. Saehyun was curled up next to Saeyoung and MC, wrapped like a burrito under multiple blankets as he tried to grin and bare through the pain of his now aching muscles. He needed to remember never to do that again, no matter how convincing Vanderwood made it sound.

His eyes began to drift shut, before quickly opening again as he became startled by the sound of gunshots blaring from the TV. He jumped, his breathing quickening briefly as the noises triggered the unpleasant memories of only a few days prior. Having a gun pointed at his head by the prime minister's employee or maybe it was a supporter? He couldn't remember. The fear was still very much there, though.

He felt Saeyoung suddenly give him a reassuring pat on the back as if sensing his distress. It calmed him enough to get his breathing back in check, while his brain registered the fact that it was just a movie. He pressed his head harder into the pillow below him, sinking into its plush depths.

He could feel exhaustion beginning to tug at his mind once more, blinking sleepily when the credits began to roll. He watched the happy couple chatter excitedly about it, discussing the parts they liked best and what disappointed them before MC left the room to make more popcorn. It appeared she wanted to watch another movie, or maybe it was Saeyoung who did. He wasn't really paying attention.

“Saeyoung…” he started after a few seconds or so of listening to his brother munch on the last bit of his ice cream cone.

“Yeah?” He whispered, his voice soft and soothing.

“I'm considering forgiving you,” Saehyun replied, yawning quietly. “You're a better brother than you first let on,” he half-joked, covering a quarter of his face under the comforter that enveloped his frame.

There was a long silence between them, or at least what felt like a long silence. At first, Saehyun thought that maybe he had offended the larger male and he believed his suspicions to be true...until he heard the other sniffle. He instinctively turned his attention to Saeyoung's face, the glow of the TV reflecting off his identical yellow eyes. Around the edges, he could see the beginnings of tears, while a smile slowly graced his lips. Saehyun’s heart beat fast at the sight, wiggling slightly in anticipation for the hacker’s response.

“Thank you, Saehyun…” Saeyoung’s voice shook but he sounded...happy.

Saehyun nodded, covering his own smile up as MC came back with a new bowl of popcorn. Within a few minutes, he had fallen asleep.

 

“Wake up, sleepyhead.” It was Eun's voice or at least what sounded like her voice. Maybe it was just his imagination, or maybe she was really there. He cracked his eyes open, light pouring into them instantaneously. Though he didn't seem to care as Eun was now standing over his form, a hand gently running through his crimson locks. If he was a cat, he would most likely be purring, he thought, opening and closing his mouth with a smack of his lips.

“I missed you, Eun. I missed you so much,” he whispered to her. She laughed, a bright white, blocking out the scenery around them. Maybe he had died and gone to heaven because all he could think about was how much she looked like an angel.

“Why did you miss me? I've always been here,” she replied, joy and happiness dancing around in her gaze. He felt completely soothed by it like all his problems vanished when under her glow.

“No, I lost you and you can't reach me,” he explained, his mind muddled and dizzy with sleep. He couldn't even remember why she wasn't around or why he couldn't see her.

“Don't be silly, Saehyun. Just reach out your hand, I'm here,” she said, brushing a loose strand of brown hair behind her head. He slowly pushed his hand out from below him and reached towards her just as she instructed. His arm felt heavy as if it had turned to lead, so his movements were slow and sluggish.

The closer he reached, the more the world around him would reappear while she vanished. He began to panic, trying to push himself to reach her before it was too late. He mentally cursed himself, forcing his body to move quicker. But it felt like his arm was pushing through a strong current rather than the air. A force pushing him away, like it didn't want him to come any closer. He tried to call out her name, but his voice would not emerge from the depths of his throat. She quickly vanished before he could do anything, leaving a heavy hole in his heart upon her escape. In her place was MC, her expression just as soft and inviting as Eun’s had been. The moment their eyes met, she giggled.

“Good morning, are you hungry?” MC asked. He uttered something incoherent in reply, though it made sense in his head. It was either 'kinda hungry, yeah’ or 'food sounds good’. Maybe he had morphed the two together, he couldn't remember. “Hungry sounds yeah? Are we making up a new language?” she teased, as he slowly blinked. It felt like someone had come by and tried to glue his eyelids shut.

“Yes...wait, what was the question?” He mumbled, causing her to laugh.

“I'll go get you some breakfast,” she announced, ruffling his hair before stepping away from the couch he was laying on. Oh yeah, he had fallen asleep watching movies, he recalled, wiping up a string of saliva that had fallen from his lips and trailed down his face. He questioned why he always had to sleep with his mouth open...how gross. He then went stiff when he heard footsteps just behind him. Was Saeyoung also around?

He felt someone boring holes into his back with their gaze alone. Staring intensely at him, like they wished he would disappear. He shifted towards the source, staring stupidly up at Saeran who was glaring back down at him. He was surrounded by that dark aura again, the same one that he could feel drifting around his form when they met in that room full of monitors. He had an intense look in the eyes that mirrored his own.

Saehyun gulped audibly at the sight, just barely noting the fact that his throat was dry and scratchy. He then flinched when the other reached out towards him. He could practically feel the malicious and anger fueled intent behind it. His body practically turning to stone as he watched it draw ever closer.

“Oh, Saeran, there you are!” It felt like time itself had stopped when MC spoke. Saeran’s expression instantly softening like the animosity he had felt towards his brother never existed. The air around them became free of tension, almost eerily so as he turned to walk over to her.

“Morning, MC,” he greeted.

“Were you talking to Saehyun? I didn't mean to interrupt.” MC was completely naive when it came to this situation.

“...” Of course, Saeran wouldn't reply, no 'talking’ had been occurring. In fact, it felt like he had wanted to kill him.

“You don't need to be embarrassed,” she replied, their voices fading when they left the room, eventually becoming nothing but soft murmurs in the distance.

Saehyun plopped his head back down onto the nearest couch cushion, he hadn't realized until now that he had been shaking. What just happened? he asked himself.

“Morning, Saehyun!”

“Oof!” And did Saeyoung just hit him in the face with a pillow?!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr: [@aromaticboar](https://aromaticboar.tumblr.com)  
> Ko-fi: [@Xenolith](https://ko-fi.com/aromaticboar)


	8. A Step In The Right Direction

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, this chapter is much shorter than usual but I wanted to get it out anyway. I've really been losing any and all motivation to write which I hope comes back soon. I've just been going through a rough patch in my life and I don't have many people who care to support me. I hope to get the next update out soon, but we'll see. Anyway, without further ado please enjoy and I would really appreciate any feedback. It really means a lot to me to know somebody still cares about this fanfic. 
> 
> **Warning!:** Contains major spoilers and possible triggering themes, read at your own risk. Do not read or comment on this if you are a minor.
> 
> Tumblr: [@aromaticboar](https://aromaticboar.tumblr.com)  
> Ko-fi: [@Xenolith](https://ko-fi.com/aromaticboar)

Saehyun let out an aggravated groan, smacking his fingers angrily against the side of his mouse. He glared at the monitor in front of him while Saeyoung cheered that he had won for the fifteenth time in a row. They had been playing games for the past couple hours and Saehyun was, to be frank, horrible at it. He constantly forgot what keys to hit and his reaction time left much to be desired.

“This game is stupid, this is why I don't play them,” Saehyun huffed, flicking a bubble gum wrapper into a nearby bin.

“You're just terrible at it, get good,” Saeyoung teased, as his irritated brother picked up his straw from his empty cup and threw it at Saeyoung’s head. It bounced off his forehead before falling into his lap. “Ew, that was wet, you know!” he exclaimed, moving to find something to toss back.

“Wet with my backwash,” was Saehyun’s mischievous reply; though he only ended up regretting it when he watched Saeyoung coat a chip in his saliva. “You better not!” He warned, preparing a shield with a nearby empty cookie box. It was in vain, however, as the chip ended up stuck to his cheek. He let out a noise like a huge disgusting spider landed in his lap, throwing it off. Saeyoung was laughing his ass off, MC walking in at that moment and getting hit with the wet chip.

“What did I tell you two about throwing things?” She scolded, placing it into the garbage and giving them both a look. Both brothers turned away and feigned innocence, Saeyoung adding to it by whistling. “Don't pretend you didn't do anything.”

“It was Saehyun, he started it,” Saeyoung instantly accused.

“Don't pass the blame onto me, traitor!” Saehyun whined.

“That's it, dish duty for Saehyun and laundry for Saeyoung,” she replied, causing them both to let out groans. “Now come on, I've decided we should have a picnic for lunch, I've even invited Vanderwood,” she added winking at Saehyun. He gave her an unamused look in return, why did she wink at him?

“Aww, can't we both get dish duty at least?” Saeyoung asked, following his wife as she left the small office area.

“Like I want a repeat of the other day, I almost tripped on a puddle of soap you squirted on the floor,” she argued, their voices growing more distant.

“It was a mistake, babe~” Their chatter eventually transforming into soft murmurs.

Saehyun sighed once they had completely exited the room, running a hand through his thick curls. He needed to take a shower before they left, he thought, moving to do just that.

Once he entered the bathroom he immediately went straight for the shower, fiddling with the faucet. He hissed when he went to test the water with his hand, only to have it be scalding hot. He quickly turned on the cold, relieved when it became a more lukewarm temperature. Stepping in, he closed the shower door behind him before watching water quickly begin its journey down his naked form.

“Mhm,” he let out a pleasurable noise, basking in the warmth of the water. Fumbling with a shampoo bottle, he went to squirt some on his hand, the pink and white swirled liquid spreading out across his palm. He moved his arm up to lather it through his locks after sufficiently wetting them, coating them in little white suds. In a way, he almost wished there was someone here to do it for him, the thought sending tingles down his spine but he was quick to rid his mind of it.

Once he was finished he moved his hand down his body, smearing his chest with soap as he went. He paused around his groin, his fingers ghosting the soft crimson curls that matched the ones on his head. When was the last time he-? He cut his own thoughts off, as if embarrassed by where this was going, even though nobody would know. It was a while ago, since a day before the kidnapping, he remembered, letting out a huff as he curled himself around his member. Just wash it and be done, he scolded himself.

After the first experimental pump, which he swore was just to get it washed; came another and another until he was pulsing in his own palm. He leaned back against the tiled wall behind him, staring at nothing in particular while he continued committing his sins. He really didn’t have time for this, he was supposed to be in and out but he had dug himself too far deep to escape.

Saehyun let out an almost inaudible breathy moan when he circled around the head. He felt so sensitive from the complete lack of attention it had been receiving recently, and god, did it feel good. He gently bit down on his bottom lip, using his shampoo as a kind of lubricant; bubbles forming and running towards his balls before dripping downwards and ending their journey in the drain. Each caress of his handmade an extra sloshing noise, just barely drowned out by the running shower head.

“Nngh…” he whispered under his breath when he traced his thumb over his slit, the action awakening a billion little nerve endings along his body. His cock began to drool pre-cum in response, hanging just below him like a thin, fragile thread before snapping off and disappearing at his feet in a whirlpool of water and suds.

“Hah~” another noise slipping past Saehyun’s lips involuntarily, his movements speeding up with the need to wrack his body and mind with pleasure. These past few days had left him longing for this and he didn’t realize until now how pent up he was. Each time one of his digits danced across a throbbing vein, he was reminded of how much he had been denying himself. He was a man, it was only natural, healthy even, to eventually yearn for some form of release. For someplace to channel all his sexual frustrations and desires in a natural way.

He clenched his teeth together, various lewd images swirling through his mind while he searched desperately for the right ones that he deemed worthy to linger on. When he found it, he clenched his eyes shut tight and tilted his head forward, his hair framing his face and shampoo trailing down to his lips from in between the ruby coloured strands.

Soft brown hair, bright pink lips, curving into a seductive smile. A chest that bounced with his every thrust, hands firmly placed on either side of her hips, intoxicated by her smell, by her eyes. He imagined them fluttering open to look back at him, a golden brown.

“Saehyun, are you okay in there?” He practically tripped over his own two feet, his ecstasy shooting out towards the shower wall and coating it in his shame. In his panic, he let out a loud moan, by accident before slamming his hand against the frosted glass door to steady himself. It couldn’t support his weight for longer than a couple seconds, opening with a loud bang. “Saehyun?!” It was MC, panic completely overriding whatever small amount of pleasure he felt when the doorknob began to turn.

“I’m fine, I’m fine! I just have a stomach ache!” He almost slammed his face into his hand at that horrible excuse. Though it was far too late anyway, MC was already inside the room, staring at him like a deer caught in headlights. It was like the first time she walked in on him in the shower, except much, much worse.

Her eyes went from his face, to his dick, which was very much still in his hands and back to his face again, multiple times. “I’m so sorry!” She finally exclaimed, a blush staining her cheeks before she quickly fled and slammed the door behind her.

Saehyun felt about ready to drop dead while he finished up his shower after that, not able to look MC, or even Saeyoung for that matter, in the eyes the moment he stepped out. He walked like he was in some kind of trance towards the car they were taking to get to the picnic site with his head facing towards the ground.

MC seemed a lot calmer about it though, trying to coax him into talking while they drove. It seemed she quickly got over the initial shock. Why was he sitting next to MC? He guessed it was better than sitting next to Saeran, but now it was just torture. He luckily was able to avoid much chit-chat, sticking to one worded answers until they arrived.

He followed them, when they got out; walking as far away from the rest group as possible. At least the scenery was calming, lush green trees and shrubs filled with an assortment of different shaped leaves surrounded him. Though it did nothing to quell his embarrassment.

When they met up with Vanderwood, he took a spot under some shade while keeping himself occupied by plucking grass out of the ground, one by one. He wished he had told them he was sick and locked himself in his room for the rest of his existence.

“Saehyun, are you feeling okay?” Saeyoung asked, sitting next to him.

“I'm fine,” he replied, turning his attention to a rock next to him. He poked it, jumping back with a yelp when a spider crawled out from underneath. “Ahh! Saeyoung, kill it, it's coming for me!” He yelled, falling backwards on top of the identical redhead in his panic. His yelling drew everyone's attention, causing them to laugh when they realized what was going on. When the spider turned the other way, he let out a breath, crisis averted.

“What the hell are you screaming about?” Vanderwood asked, his tone laced with irritation.

“There was a spider out for blood!” Saehyun explained as Saeyoung laughed underneath him. Saeran was giving him an unamused look while MC was trying her hardest to contain her giggles.

“Are you scared of bugs, Sae-hyun?” Saeyoung singsonged, drawing out his name purposefully to tease him. He then received a jab in his side, his body jolting and a wheeze passing his lips in response.

“Gah, don't poke me, I'm sensitive,” he whined, causing MC to release her contained amusement. Her laughter echoing around them as she struggled to quiet down once more.

“Alright you two, get over here, everything's ready,” she announced after taking in a breath, gesturing to the blanket she was sitting on, a cooler placed in the middle between her, Vanderwood and Saeran. They turned back to their previous activities as Saehyun moved to get up, apologizing to his brother for throwing himself on top of him. Though before he could, Saeyoung gripped his arm to prevent him from leaving.

“You didn't tell me what was wrong,” he whispered, his gaze switching from playful to something more intense. “You've been avoiding MC suddenly, what did you do?” He asked, voice bordering something dangerous. Saehyun bristled in reply, cursing Saeyoung and his skills of observation.

“I wouldn't touch your wife, stop blaming me for stuff like that. Just she-nothing weird happened-well it was kinda weird, I wouldn't call it sexual though-well it was kind of sexual-but it was her fault,” he rambled embarrassedly, flicking his gaze anywhere but towards his brother's face.

“Spit it out already!” He said, raising his voice just slightly enough to accentuate the fact that he was being dead serious. Oh no, his shitty explanation was just pissing him off even more. Saehyun blinked, a blush staining his cheeks.

“I don't want to talk about it, it's embarrassing for me. She just walked in on me-you know-” he mumbled, glancing behind him to make sure no one was listening. He was almost pleading that Vanderwood would come over and separate them, but he was simply chatting with Saeran about baking, while completely ignoring the conflict brewing between the two identical looking brothers.

“No, I don't 'know’,” he replied, mocking Saehyun’s tone of voice near the end.

Saehyun gulped audibly, butterflies swarming into his belly as he realized he would need to explain himself fully. Couldn't Saeyoung just make an educated guess? There's only so many things she could just walk in on that would embarrass him so much. This was almost as bad as having MC walk in on him in the first place, he thought, biting down gently on his bottom lip.

“I was-” he paused, taking in a deep breath to reign in what little confidence he had. It felt like his dignity was being thrown onto the floor and stomped all over. “I was masturbating, okay?” He whispered, voice dropping to something almost inaudible.

Saeyoung’s expression softened as realization dawned on his face. He then placed a hand over his mouth, clearly trying not to laugh. “I'm sorry, you need to repeat that,” he teased. “I couldn't quite hear it,” he added.

“I am not repeating it, you heard it just fine,” he growled under his breath, while Saeyoung began to laugh at his expense. “You're officially the worst brother ever, I like Saeran better,” he whined, turning to leave.

“Stop teasing Saehyun, or else!” MC scolded upon hearing the last bit of what was being said as the two of them walked over. Saehyun only hoped to whatever lord existed above that Saeyoung didn’t blab about this newly acquired information to the other two.

Though as Saehyun sat there staring at his helping of salad, since he had refused to eat a fast food burger, he could feel his mind become draped in a veil of depression. Even if he could understand Saeyoung getting upset since it involved MC, he was not willing at all to give him any kind of benefit of the doubt. He instantly believed he was up to something and if he were, to be honest, it hurt. Especially more so since he was left to think about it. He could feel his appetite drift away into an endless void of nothingness, picking lazily at his greens with a downtrodden expression.

He turned to Saeran when he poked him in the arm. He hadn't even realized they were sitting side by side until now. He must have done it subconsciously after the whole embarrassing confession with Saeyoung.

Saeran leaned in next to Saehyun’s ear, “what did Saeyoung say to you?” He asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

“I was just caught doing something embarrassing,” Saehyun explained which caused his mint eyed brother to raise a brow at him.

“Don't get upset over that, Saeyoung’s an idiot who says stupid things,” Saeran said, stunning Saehyun. Was he trying to comfort him? But why? He swore that he was angry with him.

“It just upset me that-that it was like, I don't know, he's always blaming me for stuff. It doesn't make sense, I barely know you guys so I understand why you don't trust me. But I-but I don't know, it hurts,” Saehyun vented, his voice shaking slightly, as he jammed a slice of tomato into his mouth. “Sorry, it's stupid,” he apologized around his food.

Saeran gave him a look, as MC and Saeyoung began laughing at something uttered by Vanderwood quite loudly. He then turned back to his meal without a word, making Saehyun believe he had upset him or weirded him out. He sniffled loudly, his stomach churning as it threatened to expel its contents. Why was he getting so emotional? He questioned himself, running an arm over his eyes.

“Saehyun, are you okay?” MC questioned, worry dripping off her every word, everyone going silent.

“Yeah, I'm fine,” he replied, his voice cracking and his vision going blurry. Shut up, shut up, shut up, he cursed himself while he blinked rapidly. Why was he always so sensitive? Why did he have to overthink every little thing? Who cares, who cares! He screamed in his head, trying to will the throbbing in his throat to disappear. It felt as if it was trying to constrict in on itself, not enough to block his airway but enough to make him uncomfortable.

He wanted to get up and walk as far away as he could, the feeling of everyone staring at him like he had grown another head dropping his mood to even lower depths. He sniffled again, acting upon his urges and getting up, murmuring something about needing to use the restroom really badly. He then hid behind the furthest bush and curled in on himself. He swore as he left he heard Saeyoung call for him in a concerned manner, but he didn't look back. He just needed space for the rest of his life, no, for the rest of eternity. Why the hell did he vent to Saeran of all people? Idiot, idiot, idiot.

Within what felt like an hour, but was only a couple of minutes, came the sound of rustling leaves behind him. “Saehyun, you're not actually peeing, are you?” MC asked only to receive no response. “If you don't respond, I'm going to walk over there,” she warned. For some reason hearing her voice made him let out a choked sob, the noise eliciting her to push her way through shrubbery over to him. “Saehyun…” she whispered once her eyes landed on his form. She then came to sit down next to him on the dirt of the forest floor. She put an arm around his shoulder, pulling his head towards her chest. He just let her, another pathetic noise escaping his lips. “Is this because Saeyoung teased you about something? I swear to god, sometimes his jokes go too far. I knew he was up to something when he didn't let you walk over,” MC started as Saehyun sucked in a breath. “If he ever bugs you like that again, come and get me, I'll tell him to mind his own business!” MC reassured, frowning slightly when all he did was hiccup. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“It's stupid, I'm stupid. I don't know why I told Saeran, he doesn't care. Neither of them cares,” he explained, tears finally escaping the threshold of his eyes and running clumsily down his cheeks.

“What did you say to Saeran? You can tell me okay? It's okay, it's okay,” she said, soothingly running her digits through his crimson locks.

“I don't know, my feelings, they're dumb, I just-I don't even know why I feel them,” he replied, trying to wipe away the salty streaks stuck to his cheeks. Each time he did, they were only replaced by more. “I just-he’s always blaming me for things and I get that I haven't known him for long but...but why does it hurt?” His voice was struggling to slip past his throat which was burning with his every breath.

“He has no right to be blaming you for anything, you haven't done anything wrong,” she whispered, wiping away the wet stains under his lashes with her thumb. “Your feelings are not stupid either and you have every right to feel them and every right to cry,” she added.

“It shouldn't matter, it shouldn't matter,” he uttered, his words fractured as he finally broke down. He was a sobbing mess, gripping onto MC like his life depended on it while she stroked his hair and whispered nothing but positive reassurance that everything would be okay. He felt so good while he cried, it was so amazing to release, his throat finally relaxing.

He let out a sigh when he was done, his eyes closed and his chest felt light. With his head pressed against MC’s chest, he felt safe, like he didn't want to separate from her warmth. He honestly wanted to fall asleep and he was tempted to until he heard another rustle of leaves, rocketing up into a sitting position, luckily it was just Vanderwood. He was standing in front of them, pushing a thick branch up and out of his face.

“Your husband is freaking out over you two, you should go calm him down, I'll deal with Saehyun,” he said as MC nodded, giving Saehyun one last look before leaving. “What's wrong now? You've been acting weird ever since you showed up, care to explain?” he asked, moving to lean against a tree trunk.

“No.” Vanderwood rolled his eyes, pulling Saehyun off the ground and flicking an ant off his shirt. Saehyun didn't notice it until he did that and he let out a squeal in response, gripping onto the older man.

“I can guarantee it's not as bad as you're making it out to be,” Vanderwood added, completely ignoring Saehyun’s little freak-out. “Now spill, or else,” he fake threatened.

“Or else, what?”

“Or else that ant is coming back.” Saehyun let out a snort, rubbing his puffy red eyelids.  
“I'll be prepared with my new self-defense skills,” he joked, flailing his arms when Vanderwood almost caught him off guard with a single light push.

“No you won't, now out with it,” he demanded, grabbing both of Saehyun’s arms before he fell over and pinning him to the nearest hard surface. “or else you'll really regret it,” his voice dipped to something dangerous, though the playful sparkle in his eyes betrayed his acting.

Saehyun stared back at the other man, the hairs on the back of his neck standing on end. “It's-it’s embarrassing, you're just going to make fun of me.”

“Oh please, if it's because of Saeyoung making fun of you for jacking off, I'll have you know I've walked in on him doing way worse when we used to work together.”

“H-how did you know that's what we were talking about?” Saehyun stuttered, his face a bright red.

“I have really good hearing,” he explained, causing Saehyun to almost faint. Could this day get any worse? “Stop looking at me like that. It's not a big deal, it'll only get to you if you let it get to you. Saeyoung was always good at playing off his embarrassing moments with a joke.”

“I'm not Saeyoung,” he mumbled lamely.

“Yeah, I know that. I'm just giving you an example of what you could do. Or you could threaten to tase him, either way, works.” The last part was supposed to be a joke but Saehyun just gave Vanderwood a confused look like an idiot. “I was kidding,” the older male grumbled awkwardly.

“Oh..oh! Haha, sorry my mind is all muddled,” he replied, jumping slightly when Vanderwood wiped a now dried tear streak from his face.

“You cry too much,” he said more to himself than the bewildered redhead standing before him. “Now let's get back, you left all your food there,” he added as Saehyun nodded.

The two of them walked to their small picnic site, the brunette announcing he had found him while Saeyoung had a look on his face that read he was genuinely concerned. He decided he didn’t want to talk to his brother right now, so instead, he sat next to Vanderwood and finished up the rest of his salad in relative silence while half-listening to everyone else chatter. He could feel Saeran continuously glance at him from across the plaid blanket but he opted to pay it no mind. He was too exhausted to care or want to take notice of it. Saeran was probably just back to hating him or whatever that mood was that Saeran always felt like being in.

By the end of lunch, he had completely forgotten why he had even been upset. If it weren't for the fact that his eyelids were swollen and itchy from constantly rubbing them, it would've looked like he had never cried at all.

Saehyun ignored his brother and his brother's wife while they packed up. He was too busy focusing on the cherry flavoured soda in his hands, the precipitation on its tin surface coating his palms and causing him to occasionally wipe it off. It's not like they were asking him to help, anyways.

He became startled when he suddenly had a blue popsicle stuffed into his face. He stared at it like an idiot for a few seconds, following the hand gripping the stick to its source with his eyes. Saeran was staring at nothing in particular as he waited for him to accept it, like he wished he wasn't currently offering him the chilly dessert. Saehyun hesitantly took the frozen treat, growing more confused when the other redhead promptly took off. He wasn't going to sit down with him? He thought, giving Vanderwood a look like he had the answer to his nonverbal question. The older man simply shrugged, not having any ideas either.

Saehyun brought it to his lips before running his tongue along the tip. The sugar, coated his taste buds, cancelling out the taste of the beverage he had been sipping. Glancing to his side he noticed Vanderwood staring at him, an odd expression on his face, one he had never seen before. It caused his stomach to do somersaults, though he couldn't figure out why. He quickly turned back, putting his can down onto the grass next to him, ghosting his now free hand over his stomach. He jumped as it sent shockwaves coursing through his body, just about dropping Saeran's gift in the process. What was wrong with him?

 

Saehyun was splayed out across the couch in Saeyoung's living room, dipping in and out of sleep. The TV was droning on about something he didn't really care about, but occasionally focused on for a few seconds, only to drift back into an unconscious state. A few times he would be woken up by the sounds of talking or a soft clatter somewhere in the building, though for the most part he was left undisturbed.

“Saehyun,” Saeyoung called, his voice soft and gentle as if it were possible to break a human being with his tone alone.

Saehyun grumbled some nonsensical response to his name in his half-conscious state. He didn't even remember what he was trying to say, if he were being honest. Though when a hand landed near his head, he found himself cuddling it, causing its owner to stiffen. In his jumbled mind he believed it to be Eun, so he thought nothing of drawing it closer to him and laying himself atop of it.

“Love you…” he muttered before smacking his lips together sleepily.

“I'm not MC,” Saeyoung half-joked, relaxing somewhat.

“I wasn't saying it to her,” he mumbled, causing his brother to stiffen again. He heard the other swallow as a few minutes ticked by, no one saying a thing. It gave Saehyun enough time to almost fall back asleep; the memory of this moment about to be wiped permanently from his brain. That was until his brother pulled him up and into a hug. He blinked awake, confused by the sudden change in positions.

“I'm sorry about earlier today, I shouldn't have-I just-” Saeyoung stuttered, seemingly unsure about how to phrase his apology. “Don't think I don't care,” he added. Where was this coming from? It was obvious he was only doing this because MC probably bitched him out. To Saehyun it felt almost ingenuine, as he tried to piece together a response.

“It’s-it’s fine,” he muttered, patting his brother on the back awkwardly. He didn’t really know what to say or how to continue the conversation but he was glad, at least, that his brother didn’t hate him. Though he would probably still end up being the first one blamed for future conflicts, so this did nothing to sate those worries. However, this was better than nothing, a step in the right direction and one they both desperately needed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please consider leaving a comment or kudos, thank you. 
> 
> Tumblr: [@aromaticboar](https://aromaticboar.tumblr.com)  
> Ko-fi: [@Xenolith](https://ko-fi.com/aromaticboar)


	9. Ambushed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...it's kind of been a while since I've updated this, I know, I'm ashamed of myself too. T-T But a lot kept going on that completely ruined my drive to write just about anything, it was just one shitty thing after the other and it really got me down. Anyway, you don't care about any of that but basically, stuff is looking up now so I hope from this point forward that I can update more frequently and sooner. Don't worry, I haven't dropped this fic or anything, this story is still relevant, baby! XD enjoy~
> 
> I would like to give a big thanks to, [@chaoticstarblossoms](https://chaoticstarblossoms.tumblr.com), for beta reading this chapter. Thanks and love you~ 
> 
> Tumblr: [@aromaticboar](https://aromaticboar.tumblr.com)  
> Ko-fi: [@Xenolith](https://ko-fi.com/aromaticboar)
> 
>  **Warning!:** Contains major spoilers and possible triggering themes, read at your own risk. Do not read or comment on this if you are a minor.

Two months, it had been a whole two months since the kidnapping. Two months since he had last seen his family, spoken to his friends or mingled with anybody outside of his two brothers, his brother’s wife and occasionally Vanderwood. Saehyun swore he was beginning to lose it. He had never been cooped up like this, separated from the outside world, since before he was adopted by his currently family.  
  
Well, it wasn’t nearly as bad as the treatment he got then. He was fed, housed, comforted, loved; rather than chained away in the dark to rot. That didn’t mean his current situation was healthy, no matter how much his bond with Saeyoung grew; or the fact that Saeran finally opened up to him a bit more every day. That was all fine and dandy, but they could go about their lives like there was no addition added to their little happy trio at all. He couldn’t and he very much still had a life to live outside of his pillow fights with a moody hacker.  
  
“Hey, Saehyun, guess what I picked up for you at the store,” Saeyoung said with a cheery grin, successfully cutting off his brooding while he peeked over the couch at him. Two pairs of identical golden eyes met, after the smaller of the two turned over onto his back to focus up at his brother. He could tell his hands were hidden behind his form and he was dancing happily on the tips of his feet like he couldn’t wait to show him something. The medical student stared at him, waiting in silence for him to pull his gift into view. Though he guessed his lack of a response bothered his older sibling as he began to speak again. “Come on, not even a guess?” he asked disappointedly, smirking before Saehyun even processed his words as if knowing he would react.  
  
“Oh, sorry, I thought you were just going to show me. Um…” he replied, trailing off before bringing a finger to his lips, pretending to be deep in thought. “Ice cream,” he guessed, forcing a smile as Saeyoung cheerfully gave him a popsicle.  
  
He took it from the other’s calloused hands, staring at the multicoloured treat. For some reason, and one he could not understand, Saeyoung had been feeling the need to go out and get him ice cream often. It was strange and made the other oddly excited like there was something else tied to bringing him the frozen dessert rather than just the joy of gift giving. Saehyun didn’t really care for ice cream all that much but he smiled anyway for his brother’s sake. Playing it off like he was just _‘that’_ excited to receive the chilled sweet from the identical redhead. It seemed to really make him happy, so what was the harm?

He brought it to his lips, tongue snaking about halfway out before he was forced to pause. “Wait, Saehyun, before you start,” Saeyoung piped up, causing his gaze to turn over towards him. He blinked when he was suddenly pulled into an embrace. “Need my daily hug,” he mumbled happily.

Despite himself, Saehyun's heart skipped a beat while he shook his head. “Why do you even need daily hugs? Can't you just get them from MC?” He asked, patting the older male on the back.

“Not the same…” he whined, rubbing his cheek against his shoulder like an idiot. “Besides, I need to make up for all the lost hugs we didn't get, growing up apart,” he justified as Saehyun grew silent. The smaller Choi wasn't really sure what to say while he swallowed thickly, listening to the drone of the TV for a second. “Plus you're the only one who always lets me do it~”

“I can't believe MC rejects your advances occasionally,” He replied jokingly as Saeyoung finally pulled back, shrugging his shoulders nonchalantly.

“Eh, sometimes she's busy or not in the mood,” he answered, taking a large chomp off the top of his popsicle.

“Oh…”

“Why do you always let me, anyway?” He asked, his expression soft and filled with nothing but hope, causing the youngest’s stomach to burst forth with what felt like something akin to a coiling worm.

“I don't know - you always look so happy and it makes me feel the same way,” he explained, pink tinting his cheeks while he finally took a bit of his frozen treat into his mouth before it melted everywhere. The larger redhead's smile faded slightly as he turned to glance down at his lap in what appeared to be shame.

“But...I've done nothing but hurt you. I've physically hurt you and emotionally…” he whispered, tapping his finger absentmindedly against the stick in his hand.

“What are you suggesting? I yell at you instead?” The medical student asked, offering his sibling an unamused look.  
  
“Wouldn’t be the first time...” he replied, voice trailing off into something filled with sorrow.  
  
“Are you talking about Saeran? You know, it’s probably not healthy to replace him with someone else,” Saehyun blurted out the moment the thought entered his mind. Shit, when had he gotten so comfortable around his captor, anyway? He questioned himself internally, running his tongue along the food grasped between his digits, once more.  
  
“What?! No, that’s not what I’m doing at all!” He exclaimed, eyes widening as he realized he had gotten slightly emotional. He cleared his throat, adjusting himself on the couch, and moving his right foot up onto the cushion he was seated on.

A heavy silence surrounded them, while Saehyun gazed over at his brother through the lenses of his glasses. Blinking once as he glanced momentarily towards his popsicle, trying to formulate something to say. They both nervously reached upwards to adjust their glasses in unison, opening their mouths to speak. Saehyun laughed when he realized they were subconsciously mimicking each other's actions. Saeyoung soon following in joint amusement.

“You go first,” they both said, voices sounding almost identical. The small Choi burst into another fit of laughter, grinning from ear to ear while the older triplet elbowed him playfully.

“You're doing it on purpose!” The eccentric hacker accused, a bright smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

“No way, you are!” Saehyun giggled, dodging a pillow as it was catapulted at his head. The cushion soared through the air, past the threshold of the loveseat they were lounging on before hitting an annoyed Saeran as he sauntered in through the front door. Mint green eyes turned to glare at them, before softening when they seemed to notice something.

“Can I have one?” He asked, Saeyoung immediately jumping to the task of getting him a popsicle as well. Saehyun chuckled, watching him as he danced towards the kitchen like a moron before turning back to his other sibling, feeling the couch shift under his weight as he took a seat. “What are we watching?” He asked, glancing towards the TV with a bored expression.

“A romantic soap opera!” He exclaimed, pouting slightly when Saeran gave him a look.

“Is that all you watch?” The larger groaned, quickly changing the channel to a show about baking. The smaller of the two didn't much care, he hadn't been paying attention from the moment Saeyoung showed up anyway. Turning back to the frozen treat in his grasp, tongue darting out repeatedly to run across the smooth chilly surface.  
  
“So? Maybe I do. I just like romantic stuff. Don’t you ever think about being in a relationship?” He asked, golden orbs turning towards his sweater-clad triplet who shifted uncomfortably.  
  
“Not really?” he started unsurely, not turning his attention away from the screen before them as if too embarrassed to look his way. “I mean...you saw what happened not long ago. I don’t think I’m ready,” he mumbled almost inaudibly.  
  
“Have you ever given thought to a post-secondary education?”  
  
“A what?”  
  
“You know, college, university -”  
  
“I know that, but why?”  
  
“Well, it might be something you enjoy. You can focus your attention on a subject you're passionate about and you’d meet new people, get out of the house more. Maybe even get your own place. You know, live your life as you see fit,” Saehyun rambled, making subtle hand gestures as he discussed this potential option with the other redhead.  
  
“What does that have to do with me not being ready?” he asked incredulously.  
  
Saehyun chuckled, “the whole point of University is to get you ready.”  
  
“For a job.”  
  
“For life.”  
  
Saeran gave him a look, turning his attention to his sibling for a second, as he thought about this new possibility. “You think I could really do something like that?” he asked undecidedly.  
  
“Yeah? Why couldn’t you?”  
  
“Because I’m me.”  
  
“That’s a terrible excuse and you know it,” Saehyun countered, grinning when Saeran snickered at his response.

The larger of the two began picking small balls of fluff off his sweater, flicking them onto the floor in front of him. He was nibbling his bottom lip, seemingly mulling over something. “Saehyun…”

“Hmm?”

“What do you think I'd be good at?” He asked, shifting around nervously, almost as if he expected a negative response. Scorn for thinking freely on what he wanted to do with himself, for himself.

“Well, what do you like doing? What are some of your hobbies? Or maybe something you believe in, something you'd want to see in the world,” the smaller explained.

“I don't know.”

“You do know, you're just not thinking hard enough.”

Saeran paused, glancing downwards towards his fiddling hands, thinking for a moment. His emerald green pools flicking over the small movements his digits made as if they were extremely interesting. “I like gardening and I like cooking,” he finally said after a moment.

“Good, good, that's a great start!” He reassured cheerfully, nodding his head as he was offered a shy smile from the other male.

“I like it when MC smiles, I like when Saeyoung smiles...I like when you smile.” Saehyun immediately winked at him, causing the other to laugh and shove at his arm playfully.

“Stop that, it's not funny!”

“You're smiling~”

“Only because you look so stupid.”

“Ow, I'm hurt.”

“And you -” Saeran started, turning and addressing the largest triplet, who was grinning at them cheekily from a seat at the dining room table. “Where's my popsicle? Stop eavesdropping on our conversation, it’s annoying.”  
  
“I wasn’t eavesdropping,” the eldest lied, puckering his lips in a strange manner that Saehyun assumed was supposed to be a pout, or maybe an attempt at being cute. The smallest redhead was unsure, raising a crimson eyebrow that matched the colour of his thick curls.  
  
“Then what were you smiling at? The fucking wall? Give me a break,” Saeran cursed in annoyance, rolling his eyes and crossing his arms over his chest, before slouching back on the sofa.  
  
Saehyun sighed at the sudden shift in mood from the male sitting next to him, choosing instead to finish off his popsicle than listen to his brothers begin to childishly bicker back and forth. There was no point in indulging and the arguments were nonsensical anyway; Saeran was just being his usual grumpy self. The smallest Choi noticed his mood seemed to shift on a dime and he was beginning to suspect it was due to a mental disorder more so than his own personality. Though he was no trained professional, so his opinion on the matter was irrelevant. He tossed his stick into a nearby trash can with ease, getting up to slink back to his temporary living space. He could ask Saeyoung about going home later, now didn’t feel like a suitable time.

“Wait, Saehyun, where are you going?” Saeyoung whined, sounding almost disappointed as two pairs of eyes turned towards his receding form.

“The same place I go every day unless you feel like getting my leash and taking me for a walk,” he replied sarcastically. It hardly held much anger and spite, but it still got the point across that he was unhappy with his current situation. He could practically feel the dark aura that surrounded his brother immediately the moment he finished his retort.

“What - What do you want me to do?” He asked through grit teeth, Saeran’s expression turning to discomfort as his gaze shifted between them rapidly. Saehyun shoving his hands into his pockets.  
  
“You don’t need an answer to that, I’m sure you’re well aware,” he replied coldly, watching the once happy expression drain from his triplet’s face. The previous soft and cheerful moment, broken by him no less. But he couldn’t let him forget, he couldn’t sit here and rot for the rest of his days. He had a life outside of the small bubble he had been forced into for the past few months now. One he was more than happy to resume.

“What happens when you go back?” Saeyoung asked, defeat laced in his tone.  
  
“What do you mean?”  
  
“Will I ever see you again? Or is that it? Do we return to the way it was before? Like this never happened? Like you’re not my brother?” He whispered, almost as if he didn’t want anyone else to hear him.  
  
“What does it matter? You’ve lived a whopping twenty-six years without me already. We’re hardly brothers anyway.” He blinked as he watched the older male clench his fists slowly at his sides in reply, eyeing them warily. His mind jumping to conclusions, thinking up the worst possible outcomes to this situation he had unknowingly found himself in.  
  
“You say that and yet -” a humourless smile painted Saeyoung’s lips. “And yet you were so upset when I accused you of fooling around with my wife when it felt like you couldn’t get a decent enough relationship with me.” Saehyun’s heart skipped a beat. “You let me hold you close every day, you cried to me while you were sick and injured - you - you -” was he getting choked up?  
  
Saehyun turned to face him with a clear look of surprise plastered across his features, tears lining his sibling’s golden orbs. He was holding his arms out, Saehyun’s gaze turning towards the outstretched limbs. He knew he shouldn’t but...the redhead moved forward tentatively, taking one slow step after the other until he felt them encircle his frame. There was comfort in these arms, one he couldn’t quite place his finger on.  
  
“You _are_ my brother, you always have been…” How did he know he would walk right into this? Why - why did he want to cry? His chest hurt. “you know that, right?”  
  
He opened his mouth and shut it, glancing towards Saeran who was looking away awkwardly; but seemingly also affected by this conversation as well. “Saeyoung...just, figure this out for me, okay?” he mumbled, pressing his forehead against the other’s shoulder.  
  
“I will, I promise.” He didn’t doubt him. Not when he said it like that.

 

Saehyun opened his golden pools, staring up at the sky as his gaze wandered across puffy white clouds and birds that were so far away they almost looked akin to tiny ants. The intense light from the sun was making his eyes swell with tears; he wanted to sneeze. “Achoo!” The grass below his form swayed with his sudden movements, a few stray dandelion seeds startling into the air and dancing along with a soft breeze. The brunette next to him yawned loudly, shifting slightly and adjusting the fishing rod nestled between his legs. Occasionally he would fiddle through his tackle box, the only sounds that would break through the rush of gentle waves lapping along the shore.

“Are you even paying attention to your line, sleeping beauty?” Vanderwood asked in a condescending tone, glaring at him through honey brown eyes. He merely tilted his head in the opposite direction, letting the lush vegetation brush against his pale cheek. It was around a day and a half later that the former agent decided to take pity on him and pull him away from his brothers to go on some strange little fishing trip. He didn’t quite understand the logistics of such a decision, but he didn’t fight it either. Anything was better than laying around Saeyoung’s house looking bored.

“I’m glad you think I’m beautiful,” was Saehyun’s quick retort, closing his eyes again. He should’ve brought the sunglasses MC bought for him, but he hadn’t really expected it to be this bright out, though at least he remembered to wear sunscreen.  
  
Vanderwood let out an irritated huff almost immediately in response; the soft noise of his reel turning, filling the void between them momentarily. “You’re not going to catch anything like that,” he lectured.

“It just feels nice to sit in the sun, it's warm and relaxing. Like taking a bath when it's cold out,” Saehyun murmured, rubbing at his tired eyes. A few blades of grass that had been stuck to his hand fell onto his shirt, making him brush them off.

“What are you? A reptile?” Vanderwood teased, chuckling despite himself.

“No, I've just been holed inside for two whole months, straight, for the most part. It eventually gets to you, I'm not used to a life like this, I just want to go home. I never asked to be here and it feels like Saeyoung doesn't want me to ever leave,” he mumbled, plucking some weeds from his side absentmindedly, Vanderwood’s small grin slowly falling from his face. Replaced by a much more serious expression.

“He has grown pretty attached to you, hasn't he?” He mumbled, glancing over at Saehyun's bobber which was still rocking on the surface of the water, untouched by any passing wildlife.

“I don't think he's attached to me, more like the idea of me. The brother he always wanted from Saeran but never got - until now.”

“Well, I don't think that's necessarily true. He'll always love Saeran for Saeran, but I think he loves you, for you,” the brunette replied, giving Saehyun something to mull over. “He just treats you like a brother now, because you are his brother,” he added, casting his line out again with a swish of his pole. “Though, relationships aren't exactly my forte, believe it or not.”

“So what are you saying? Don't take your word for it?”

“Probably.”

“That's reassuring,” the redhead said sarcastically, grinning despite himself as they both chuckled.

“It's hard to know what Saeyoung's thinking. I've worked with him half my life and I still don't know,” the brunette responded in amusement, shaking his head.  
  
Saehyun slowly sat up, letting out a groan at the ache that rushed over his back from lying awkwardly across the soft soil below him. He slowly placed his hands back on his fishing pole, instead of using his legs to hold it up lazily. His crimson locks fell in front of his face in the process, causing him to brush them aside. “You know, the view is really nice from here. I don’t normally go out to the country often, so I guess this is a nice change.”  
  
“I’m glad you’re so optimistic, especially considering the situation, though I like your attitude.” The sound of a lighter could be heard but the redhead paid it no mind, admiring the scenery while he could. The rolling of mountains in the distance, the brushing of evergreens and gentle green leaves as far as the eye could see. Wildflowers and the fluttering of birds through the canopies. It was certainly a stark difference to the concrete jungle he'd grown accustomed to.

His enjoyment of their surroundings was short-lived as Saehyun scrunched up his nose when the smell of cigarette smoke hit his unprepared nostrils. His golden orbs drifted over to the former agent, noting the culprit hanging off his lips. The redhead rolled his eyes, digging for a little something he brought with him.  
  
“Hey!” Vanderwood exclaimed in surprise but was quickly cut off when a lollipop was shoved directly into his open mouth. Saehyun put out the lit object, using a small shell to place it in until he could properly dispose of it, later.  
  
“It’s a sugar-free lollipop, better for your lungs and your teeth,” he stated matter-of-factly, ignoring the glare being directed at him.  
  
Vanderwood looked about ready to give him a piece of his mind when something else caught his attention. “Saehyun, your bobber!” the redhead glanced over at it boredly, it vanished? No, that was stupid, it was under the water obviously. “Reel it in!” The medical student did as he was told, getting annoyed when the action was harder than usual.  
  
“Is it stuck on a rock or something?” he mumbled unsurely, his nerves jumping when a large creature splashed at the surface of the lake, disturbing the sleepy waves. What was that?  
  
“Don’t pull, you’ll snap it!”  
  
“Alright, alright!”  
  
“Let me get the net!” Vanderwood exclaimed, Saehyun watching curiously as he dunked the tool into the water quickly before pulling up a huge, flopping, aquatic animal. What was that?! Why did it need so many teeth?! “Wow, I should cook this up tonight,” the brunette said proudly, trying to pry the hook from its mouth with a pair of tweezers. It took Saehyun’s brain a second to register what he was staring at. His face was akin to that of a person who just watched someone meet their grisly demise. “Do you want to hold it? I’ll take a picture,” the older of the two teased, blinking when he realized the look his companion was giving it.  
  
“No!” the redhead yelled, completely mortified by such an idea.  
  
“Awe come on, it won’t bite,” he taunted, moving the net towards Saehyun’s face and bursting into a fit of laughter when the other put all his effort into sprinting back to their shared vehicle, running like his life depended on it. “Hey, get back here, it’s your catch. Don’t you want to see me cut it open?” the brunette added through intakes of air, he had never laughed so hard in his life.  
  
“Shut up and put it back!”

 

It was around sundown that Vanderwood decided to pack it up. The sun painting the sky in thick layers of reds and yellows, dancing and mixing upon the horizon. It was gorgeous to say the least, Saehyun's eyes matching a few of its hues, while he stared up in awe at the sight. It looked perfect, especially hanging over the tops of pine trees. It was somewhat like looking at a professionally crafted piece of art.

“So, how was it?” The brunette asked, his voice breaking through the soft hum of the motor and the crunch of the wheels rolling across a poorly paved road.

“What are you talking about?” Saehyun mumbled absentmindedly in reply, barely paying attention as he gazed out the window. “Oh! Look! What is that?!” He exclaimed suddenly, causing the older to glance towards what he was shouting about.

“A vulture, I think?” Was his reply, honey brown pools wracking over the redhead's face, a smile tugging upon the taller's lips.

“It's huge!”

“Yeah, they eat roadkill and throw it up on your face if you get too close.”

“And...you ruined it for me.”  
  
Vanderwood couldn't help but laugh in response, shaking his head, before focusing his attention back on the road ahead. Another short amount of time spread between them where neither of them spoke, the road eventually becoming smooth and better paved as the crunching slowly faded out to be replaced instead by the hum of the engine. Saehyun began to shift awkwardly in his seat while he rubbed his knees together. His expression contorting as he grew more uncomfortable. It took the brunette a second to notice how uncomfortable his red-haired companion seemed, raising a brown eyebrow.  
  
“What’s your problem?” The older asked, hands on the wheel occasionally moving the round object from side to side, keeping them safely on the highway they just entered. Traffic here was sparse, as the medical student began to wonder why his brother had to live so far away from the city, to begin with.  
  
“I have to go,” he mumbled unsurely, the larger of the two rolling his eyes.  
  
“I told you to piss in the bush back at the lake,” he argued, causing Saehyun to glare at him.  
  
“I’m not pissing outside!” He barked, giving the other an angry look that made Vanderwood snort in amusement. It was the most unintimidating face the older had ever had to bear witness to. Saeyoung had an identical face and yet he still managed a more ghastly expression, even when he wasn’t trying. But then again, the ex-agent noticed differences between the two brothers, appearance-wise. Saehyun had much more feminine features, like his large doe eyes, long lashes, bright pink lips and an obsessive need to fiddle with his hair. His cheeks were also chubbier, despite how much smaller he seemed in comparison to the other two. It gave him an almost childlike vibe and pushed the brunette to want to protect him.  
  
“Fine, I’ll find a gas station,” Vanderwood grumbled in annoyance, brown orbs scanning the sides of the road for any signs indicating a pitstop. The redhead watched Vanderwood as he drove with a disgruntled expression on his face. He couldn’t stand public washrooms, but it was better than pulling his dick out in a public area, even if there weren’t many people around.  
  
That’s when Saehyun noticed something was off, they had turned down a different road, leaving the highway behind them, but there had been no indication of a stop. The redhead squinted in distrust, wondering if the older man would pull him out by his ear and force him to go in the woods. The prospect didn’t seem too out of character from what he knew about the former agent so far, but he started to doubt that theory when Vanderwood continued to glance at their rearview mirror. What was so interesting back there? Saehyun wondered, turning his head to look back and yelping when that made the older jab him in the side with his elbow. He swore if he didn’t have such good control over his bladder, he would’ve emptied it all over himself and the other male’s truck.  
  
“Do you mind, what’s your problem? That hurt,” he growled, blinking when Vanderwood told him promptly to shut up and not turn his head. What the hell?  
  
Adjusting his glasses, the smaller began to develop a sneaking suspicion that something was wrong. _Very wrong_. Were they being followed? Didn’t Vanderwood just make it worse by getting off on some random, empty stretch of road? He questioned, glancing to his own side mirror as he noticed multiple black vans tailing them. Their windows appeared illegally tinted; Saehyun remembering there was only a certain amount of which someone could put on their windows before it was considered breaking the law. Now, he was no expert by any stretch of the word, but he could only assume that black and opaque was pretty unlawful.

He felt a bout of nervous energy settle in his stomach while panic began to sprout forth in his mind. What were they going to do? They were going to run out of gas eventually and they couldn’t lead them to Saeyoung’s house, it would just put everyone in danger. He swallowed the lump that had formed in his throat, glancing towards the driver with a worried expression. Vanderwood acknowledged it silently, blinking slowly in a manner similar to a cat, presumably glad he was able to figure their situation out on his own. Though that did nothing to quell the intense fear brewing within him.

The next twenty minutes were spent in tense silence, Saehyun fiddling nervously with the hem of his shirt while he tried to will the nausea away. The only things he focused on was the occasional squelch of the windshield wipers making their way across his vision, pushing aside the tears that fell from the sky when it began to cry with a soft trickle of rain. His breath continued to come out in shaky puffs of air in response to his wavering emotions. The longer they fled, the more it seemed like their attackers were gaining on them. Was this how he was going to die? He felt the urge to cry.     
  
His breath hitched when Vanderwood suddenly moved his hand away from the wheel towards the center console. The redhead’s eyes widened, watching him lift it open and pull out a gun, metal twinkling in the dreary light of a small summer’s rain. He was about to ask if the older was insane or if he wanted to have them both killed; his fear rendering him speechless, however, as his gaze landed on the deadly weapon. There was a soft click, the bullet locking into place. Saehyun focused on it obsessively, teeth pressing together as the tense feeling in the air became overpowering.  
  
“No - !” He let out a scream as glass shattered around him, something quick and lethal whizzing by his ear, his heart trying to follow its lead as it practically leapt from his body. One small centimetre and it would’ve pierced straight through his skull. It took him a moment to realize that Vanderwood hadn’t been the one to shoot it.

Saehyun covered his head with his hands, curling in on himself and jamming his eyes shut tight as if not looking would remove him from the scene entirely. Instead of what he had hoped, he heard the screeching of tires and the roar of the engine as the vehicle sped up causing him to lurch forward. His seatbelt came to his rescue, preventing him from slamming his head against the front of the vehicle and sustaining any injuries.  
  
Vanderwood turned in his seat, seemingly unfazed, to shoot his own gun, aiming directly for the tires of their assailants while the smallest let out another wail at the piercing noise. The gunshots felt as though they echoed through his body, vibrating him to his very core and causing him to dig his nails into his own head to try and ground himself. A couple more penetrated their truck, popping Saehyun’s eardrums and causing the sounds around him to diminish to a loud ringing. Tears cascaded down his cheeks and he was almost certain that by the warm feeling between his legs, he had released the contents of his bladder involuntarily, though he paid both no mind. What was he focusing on then? Where was he?!    
  
“Saehyun - Saehyun!” He jolted, almost smacking Vanderwood away in a panic. He was panting, staring up at the other with shaking and blurry vision.  
  
“ **What?!** ” He screamed, still high as all hell on adrenaline and fear.

“I lost them.”  
  
“What…?”  
  
“We stopped, they’re gone. I shot their tires out,” he explained, watching as Saehyun stared at him like a deer caught in headlights, his brain registering nothing but; _run, run, run, get away!_  
  
“What…?”  
  
Vanderwood groaned, realizing words weren’t going to get him very far. Saehyun screamed again as the ex-agent picked him up, shimmying them both out of the cramped vehicle. The redhead was gripping onto the older male desperately, a now very cold and rancid smelling liquid running down his legs towards the dirt below their forms. It left a trail of small droplets leading to the entrance of a cabin Vanderwood had brought them to; hidden far away in the woods behind thousands of thick overgrown trunks, aside from prying eyes and those who sought them out to kill them.  
  
The inside smelt muggy and distinctly of mildew, like no one had been there in a long time. Vanderwood’s boots echoed across the wooden flooring towards the bathroom, where he swiftly stripped the smallest of his clothes. Luckily water ran to the building from a pump built underground and the roof was covered in solar panels, an easy way to acquire their own electricity while staying off the grid.

The brunette tossed the soiled garments aside, turning on the faucet while Saehyun shivered viciously behind him. He looked like he wanted to throw up, pass out or both, which worried him. If something else happened and Saehyun came down with a stress-induced fever again, he wasn’t sure if they could get away in time.  
He quickly moved and placed the other male into the warm, clear, water filling up the porcelain basin. He reached out for some soap, squirting the fruity scented liquid onto a nearby loofa. He figured he might as well wash the poor guy, none of this was his fault and he’d been scared shitless. He had acted so well too, despite his lack of knowledge on being ambushed.  
  
“You’re fine, it’s okay…” the older whispered soothingly while he ran a sponge across the other male’s body, gently, leaving a line of suds in his wake. Vanderwood was never very good at comforting people but it seemed his words and actions alone were enough to calm the tiny Choi down to some degree.  
  
“Why am I in a bath?!” Saehyun babbled loudly, looking around himself frantically as if the water would swallow him whole at any moment.  
  
“You - well you -” Pissed yourself? Okay, maybe that wasn’t the right thing to say right now. “I thought it might calm you down, you were really freaking out.”  
  
“This is all your fault! This is all you and Saeyoung’s fault!” He screamed, slamming his fists against the surface of the water and causing it to splash around him in response to his sudden outburst. He was crying, sobbing in anguish as his cheeks dusted a light pink. “I want to go home! I hate all of you! I have never been so close to death so many times before in my life!” he added.  
  
Vanderwood said nothing, letting out a long drawn out breath. What could he say? He had every right to blame them for this. For the life he had been thrust into, even if it wasn’t entirely the brunette’s decision, to begin with. The fishing trip, however, was another story, that was entirely on his shoulders. He knew how dangerous it was and yet he still convinced an emotional Saeyoung to let him take his brother out somewhere, just to get away for a bit. He thought he had been doing the right thing, but it was rather foolish in hindsight.  
  
“You’re right. It’s my fault, but I’ll get us through this, okay?” Vanderwood finally whispered after listening to the smaller male ramble incoherently for a good ten minutes, venting all his frustrations. Upon hearing him speak, Saehyun raised his head and stared at him for a second, he held a look of disbelief on his face.  
  
“What…?” So they were back to this.  
  
“I said -”  
  
“I know what you said.”  
  
“Then why did you -”  
  
“Because it sounds like a lie, that’s why. Everything since day one has always been me, me, me. It’s your fault for existing Saehyun,” the redhead explained, rubbing away the tears blurring his vision. “None of you were willing to take responsibility for anything!” He exclaimed, sniffling loudly. “I was so confused...lost...alone. And you know what’s even funnier? The fact that Saeyoung always blamed _me_ for something, like his severe trust issues are _my_ problem to fix.”  
  
“Saehyun…” he reached his hand forward to tilt the redhead’s chin towards him, sighing when his hand was immediately smacked away. The sound echoed throughout the bathroom area, Vanderwood dropping it back at his side. “For what it’s worth, I never blamed you.”  
  
“Congratulations, would you like an award?” Was the bitter reply that left the medical student’s mouth, directly after.  
  
“No,” Vanderwood whispered as he rose onto his feet. “I’ll be in the other room if you need me, I have to get you new clothes anyway.”  
  
“Wait! Don’t leave me! I don’t know where I am and - and -” Vanderwood didn’t need much more of an explanation to take a seat once more, watching as Saehyun finished bathing himself, neither speaking.  
  
“Saeyoung’s probably losing his shit,” Vanderwood mumbled as he helped Saehyun out of the tub and wrapped him in a towel. “We were supposed to be back hours ago. Though on the bright side, I guess it’s a good thing you caught that fish, otherwise we wouldn’t be having dinner,” he explained, quickly retrieving the clothes from his trunk that Saehyun had brought as a spare, just in case. It was a good thing he thought of everything, otherwise, he’d be naked right now waiting for his clothes to dry after scrubbing them manually.  
  
Saehyun slowly dressed, his fear of the day’s previous events most likely overriding his hatred of being nude in front of another person. Normally something like this would be a good enough reason to warrant a tantrum from him, but right now he was surprisingly quiet. Instead, he focused on not falling flat on his face while he maneuvered his second leg into his sweatpants.  
  
“Oh…” there was nothing else he wanted to say to that.  
  
As they walked into the small living area, the first thing that hit the tiny Choi was his immense urge to sleep. He wasn’t even hungry, not in the least bit. Though once he settled down on the couch and Vanderwood started to cut and cook his catch, he realized he felt slightly different about his needs.  
  
Vanderwood eventually handed him a plate of fish...just fish. He wanted to slam his face down on the table next to his plate the moment he saw it. This was officially _the worst_ , he wasn’t sure if any other bad day in his life could top this one, except maybe the day Saeyoung beat him unconscious the night after he was kidnapped.    
  
“Thanks…” he mumbled unenthusiastically as it was placed on the coffee table before him. There wasn’t even a dining table in this hut, shack, hole in the fucking ground. He didn’t know what to make of this dump, besides the fact that it was a dump. He didn’t even like fish.  
  
Vanderwood plopped himself down next to Saehyun on the couch he was sitting on, moving to stuff some of the meal he had prepared into his mouth. “I sent Saeyoung our coordinates, he should be here by very early morning.”  
  
“Great, can’t wait to go back.”  
  
“I’m sorry…” Vanderwood apologized, scrapping his fork against his plate awkwardly.  
  
“My problems are now solved.”  
  
Vanderwood sighed, “you don’t have to be a smartass.”  
  
“...”  
  
“Just eat, okay? Maybe a hot meal and a nap will cheer you up a bit,” the ex-agent suggested, swallowing thickly and watching the redhead stuff some bland fish into his mouth. “So?”  
  
“What do you think? There isn’t even salt.” Crunch, “and there’s a bone.” Tonight was going to be a hell of a long night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr: [@aromaticboar](https://aromaticboar.tumblr.com)  
> Ko-fi: [@Xenolith](https://ko-fi.com/aromaticboar)


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